Some Lame Soap Opera

The summer before your senior year of high school is supposed to be your most memorable summer filled with parties, alcohol, a copious amount of weed, and probably hooking up in a car with some random you met at a rave while you were both rolling on molly.

I mean I guess that's what all the movies portray at least.

And yet here I am early to the early bird showing of a PG-13 horror film based on a horror book series I loved when I was in fourth grade and I'm surrounded by the usual early bird showing crowd that consisted of 60-80 year olds that snuck in plain turkey sandwiches on white bread with the crusts cut off to theaters in their unironic fanny packs. My intuition was also telling me that these were the same people who worked out at the mall on Sundays (and by working out I mean power-walking around the mall food court in workout attire). Clearly living their best life while I was (clearly) lacking in it.

"Okay, but wasn't the dude at the popcorn stand gorgeous?" Anna practically purred as she smothered our bucket of popcorn with extra butter. Her big brown eyes became dreamy as she stared off into the distance. "His eyes were a sparkling blue like the ocean..." she started to recite what sounded like a poem, "and he made my panties the ocean."

She laughed as her full lips twisted into a wide grin, definitely proud of herself for that masterpiece, while I gave her a round of applause. "A true poet," I commended.

Anna was going to be in her junior year of high school in a couple months and I was going to be a senior. She was the new girl at school in the beginning of the year and we met through our mutual friend, Ashley.

Ashley had been my best friend since fourth grade but we drifted apart this past year for many unsaid reasons. Although I hadn't known Anna as long as I did Ashley, it was almost like we were meant to be best friends. We had the same sense of humor, disliked the same things, and both seemed slightly disenchanted by the human experience. I feel like that's truly best friend gold.

Anna was very mature for her age-an old soul with a mind full of dirty innuendos. She gave really thoughtful advice and talked a lot about sex for somebody who was a virgin.

"I feel like you and the popcorn stand guy would make a cute couple," she commented with a nudge. "Beautiful babies would be made, for sure."

My eyes nearly rolled into the back of my head as I groaned. "Yeah, right! Like that kind of guy would be into me," I mumbled. Popcorn stand guy was truly gorgeous creature with amazingly curly brown hair that looked even better than my own, stunning blue eyes you can get lost in, a beautiful smile with adorable dimples, a surfer body, and probably only dated girls that looked like Barbie.

"Bitch, you are beautiful and you always forget about the hard work you've put in! So be nice to yourself!" she nearly yelled at me. She was always the angel on my shoulder telling me nice things while simultaneously also being the devil telling me to do bad things.

I've been insecure about my body for as long as I could remember. I have memories of me being as young as nine, looking in the mirror, and hating what I saw. It wasn't invisible fat like the size 5 high school girls in the lunch room would complain about after eating a bag of Hot Cheetos but I was actually fat. My family would constantly remind me as well as people from school and that was the biggest part of my childhood. My fatness.

I've always been a chubby kid but after my dad got sick I blew up like a balloon. I was really into sports but sometime around the sixth grade I got insecure about my body fat jiggling as I ran up and down basketball courts or around bases at the softball field and stopped participating in sports altogether.

It was Anna (a little bit of my PE teacher) who convinced me to sign up for softball during my junior year after Anna overheard a girl in her grade that was on the softball team talking about she wishes someone who could hit like me was on the team. It was a big step outside my comfort zone for me but it started this chain reaction of newfound confidence I never really had before.

Although the beginning of my junior year was only nine months ago, I feel like a somewhat different person coming out of it. I wore shorts for the first time in years last month to my friend Cody's BBQ hangout and I've stopped wearing baggy sweatshirts every day. By the end of junior year I dropped down from a size 18 to a size 16 because of softball conditioning. I know I will never be a size 5 like my sister Christine, but that's never been my goal in life. I'm sick of living life hating my body so I'm trying to accept it.

"Plus that ass is amazing," Anna added as she lightly punched my right buttcheek. "I would sleep on it if I could," she said jokingly.

Anna would always tell me, bitch you better love yourself the way I love you! And I'm really trying but some days it is just hard because I've just become conditioned since I was really young to hate my fat body. Even today, before I left to see this movie, I put on a sleeveless shirt I never had the courage to wear before. It was a mustard yellow top with a white peter pan collar and I tried it on and thought it was a cute outfit. When I looked in the mirror right before I left I hated how fat my arms looked so I quickly changed into a baggy sweatshirt.

It is easy for girls like Anna to say shit like Love yourself! All girls are beautiful! Our bodies are art! She was thin, naturally beautiful, and a lot of guys at school liked her so of course she could live by those words when nobody was telling you that your body was somehow wrong.

I made Anna find us good seats near the middle of the theater while I went to find the bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror before I walked out, saw a potato staring back at me, and let out a sigh. The mustard sleeveless top was way cuter than this sack.

As I exited the bathroom I heard a familiar voice that cut me. "Hey fatty!"

Immediately, my cheeks went hot and my body froze. A myriad of emotions surged through me-anger, embarrassment, sadness. That voice belonged to Francis Gotti-my brother's best friend who had made my life hell since I was ten years old.

My brother Jake has been calling me names and teasing me about my weight since I was just a kid and he used to do it in front of his friends. Not only was it humiliating, but his friends just laughed along with him and some even followed suit and called me names for years. Fatass. Fatty. Fat girl. And people wonder why I lacked self esteem.

I clenched my fists to keep the tears I felt welling up in my eyes from falling. I hated feeling like that insecure 12 year old girl I've been trying to bury for so long but things such as that voice keeps grabbing their own damn shovel to uncover it all.

With my blood boiling, I quickly spun around to face Francis just as a tall dark-haired guy wearing a black leather jacket smacked him on the back of the head-hard.

"Ow! Fuck!" Francis yelped as he rubbed the back of his head, looking in shock at the guy who hit him.

"Man, that shit gets so old. You're 20 years old for fuck's sake. Grow up or just shut the hell up already," leather jacket guy retorted. His face was filled with disgust and anger but his dark brown eyes eyes softened when they met mine.

The look of concern on his face caught me off guard a bit but this actually isn't the first time this guy has come to my defense. His name is Matt Summers. I've sort of known him for a couple of years but he's always been kind of an enigma to me. I always saw him as my brother's cool friend who rode a motorcycle, had his arms covered in tattoos, and would probably tease me about going to see a PG-13 horror movie based on a childhood book.

"Sorry, little Francis over here is just angry and bitter because he hasn't gotten laid yet," he informed me in a playful tone as he gave Francis a loud smack on the back.

The corners of my lips twisted into a small grin and Matt flashed one back at me.

"I mean look at the way he treats women. The pussy parade must be following right behind him," Matt continued, his sarcasm thick.

I found myself choking back a chuckle.

Francis shook his head and lowered it in what I can only see as defeat. "Man whatever," he grumbled before he walked off to catch up with the other people in their group.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head as he walked away with a couple of familiar faces. "Why is that guy such a dickhead?" I scoffed. I couldn't fathom someone being so mean to somebody they barely knew.

Matt smacked his lips and shook his head. "Well kid, that's what you get when your parents don't hug you," he joked in a dry tone before shoving a handful of popcorn into his mouth. It wasn't even fair how good he still looked with a mouth full of popcorn.

I stopped my thoughts from going any further and blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "No motorcycle today?"

He shook his head and grinned sheepishly. "No, not today. I'm actually seeing your sister right after this movie and she's too afraid to take a ride with me so I had to take my car," he replied, mouth still full of buttery goodness.

"I think it's because she wants to live or something," I shot back with a shrug. My mother would seriously have a heart attack if she knew Christine was dating a man who rode a motorcycle.

He chuckled. "Well she hasn't really lived if she hasn't been on my motorcycle, right?" he said with a wink.

"Oh so you're one of those guys!" I exclaimed, nodding my head enthusiastically.

He shot me a confused look and wrinkled his nose. "One of what guys? What are you talking about?"

"The kind of guy that wants to fuck his motorcycle," I replied flatly, trying to keep my face blank.

The laugh he let out came from his belly. "Ha! You're funny," he commented, wagging a finger at me. " Dry as fuck but that's what makes it funny."

I've sort of known Matt for about two or three years but have only really seen him in passing and haven't exchanged many words. He was my older brother Jake's friend in high school and has has been dating my older sister Christine for about two months. I've had more conversations with him since he started dating her and it was enough to develop sort of a small crush on him. Or maybe it is lust. I don't really know.

I feel like it is the plot to some sort of lame soap opera.

Christine was the oldest out of the three of us and just graduated from college with a degree in journalism. She's always been fairly thin and can even be referred to as "the pretty one". When I was twelve, my aunt once told me I would be prettier than my sister if I was skinny. Jake was pretty pissed at her for dating his friend but eventually got over it. I think.

Jake was the second oldest and in college. Everyone thinks of an older brother being protective and wanting to fight anybody that messed with their siblings. However, that isn't the case with Jake. He's always been very cold and let his friends call me names. He was super into fitness and worked as a personal trainer on weekends. I feel like some people see my siblings and think "well at least they ended up with nice bodies".

"So Jake picking you up after the movie?" Matt asked. He knew damn well I did not have my drivers' license yet and was getting dropped off by Jake or my dad.

Before I could answer he cut me off. "I can give you a ride if you wanted since I was gonna get Christine at your house anyways. My movie may end a little after yours but if you wanted to wait for me..."

He keeps catching me off guard and I forget how to speak sometimes with this guy. I mean I don't really know him. He's been friends with my brother for years but it's not like I've hung out with him and Christine doesn't really talk about him to me. What I know about him is what I've seen from him.

I was going to say no but I kept thinking that Anna would be so mad at me if I refused a ride from the guy she refers to as "Christine's hot ass boyfriend". She is the only one who knows that I have a slight crush on my sister's boyfriend/my brother's friend. We both know that is isn't a deep crush so it is pretty harmless, we think.

Thinking your sister's boyfriend is hot isn't horrible, right? I am no competition next to Christine so I shouldn't feel guilty. She's skinny and pretty so she automatically won already. Plus, I'm pretty sure I thought Matt was hot way before Christine started dating him. He only sees me as Jake's sister or Christine's sister anyways. A harmless crush that wasn't even serious.

I flinched in surprise as Matt reached over and picked a popcorn kernel off my shirt. He grinned again before flicking it back towards my face.

I shot him an irritated look as I elbowed his side. "Ugh you're so annoying," I mumbled, trying to hide my smile.

His grin grew wider and he started to walk backwards towards where his friends had gone. "Text your sister or bro for my number and text me when your movie ends," he called out before turning away.

I shook my head in slight disbelief. "So. Annoying," I repeated to myself, still trying to hide my smile.

A/N: Hello! After 10 years I'm back and I really wanted to rewrite this story. This will be the only chapter posted on Fictionpress. This story will be updated on my wattpad. Find the link on my profile :)