Father, when you receive this letter, remember when you found me in the streets of Naïr, ten years ago? It was extremely lonely, I still can't forget that, your arrival was like the rising of a new dawn. I'm absolutely grateful that you took me under your wing in the White Lotus. I've made countless friends and some unforgettable memories! You gave me a special White Lotus hairpin to signify my official membership and that was the first time I've received something from someone, I get overjoyed just thinking about that! 'Daughter of Baird' too! I understand that it isn't worthy of a title but it just feels absolutely prestigious as one! But it began feeling different these past three months though... Your men came back from war bringing with them your sword, usually I'm used to your absence but this really hit me differently. It isn't the same having them in the encampment without you, our grand master, my dad... Anyway, I am deeply sorry for being impatient but I have decided that I will go out and explore the world by myself despite the promise we made. Don't worry, though, it may have taken time but I am sure of this, be proud of me okay? I'll document my findings too so when we meet again, somewhere out there, I'll be the one telling stories by then instead of you! Until then!

-your daughter, Eleanor Senia


"I still believe you're out there, dad..."

I whispered to myself as I wipe away a tear while storing the letter inside a drawer of the desk dad would spend countless nights on. I turn the chair around and take a look at the achievements he has achieved with the Order, it feels lonely not having him tell stories of how these events came about. I walk out of the Grand master's Hall and barged in Ilya's room all of a sudden.

"White Lotus members must knock the door and await for the approval of the person inside before entering!"

Ilya mockingly says as she turns towards me, she really loves playing with me. Though she does look like she was drawing something, my bad for barging in without even telling her, I'll consider this as payback for what I did.

"Sorry,"

"So what is it this time?"

She continued, crossing her legs and pressing the pencil tip on her cheek. It then felt like an awkward two minutes of me composing myself while Ilya glares straight into my soul. I figured out she's becoming impatient the moment she began tapping the wooden floor and so I spilled the tea.

"I'm leaving."

Her eyes began glistening the moment she heard that, like she was about to cry as she slowly walked towards me but then out of nowhere she slapped me! I didn't think she'd react that way.

"What was that?"

I asked her as she laid her hand on my cheek, I was surprised. She looked like she was about to cry, then she slaps me, then she caresses the very same cheek she just slapped? Sometimes I wonder why she happens to be like that, not that I am, too

"It hurts, doesn't it? this better not be the third time this week, you've been announcing departure after departure for half the month already!"

"I-"

Before I could continue, she squeezed me tightly, I was brought back to the mood while she mumbles with her head buried on my shoulder

"But really, are you serious this time?"

I nodded, hugging her back. I could cry just from hearing her say that

"I'll miss you, Illy."

"Back at you, flower."

I'm gonna miss her calling me that, I'll definitely miss her, we were like sisters, stuck together through thick and thin, from tag teams to getting called off by my dad, surely a factor of our friendship was because she was my first friend when I entered the Order. None wanted to approach me because of my hair and eyes, but her? She asked me to be her friend right from the get go, it was smooth sailing from there.

"Tell dad of your sudden departure before you go, okay?"

"I'll inform sir Arya, thanks!"

And to sir Arya's office I went, that took a little over three rooms from dad's office to get and the place was cold right from the doorstep, completely opposite to dad's room. I could use a jacket whenever I'd come in there

"What brings you here, Eleanor? Have a seat."

He says pointing at the chair near the door with one hand and sorting through papers with another, things sure get busy when you become the person having to handle dad's work when he's gone.

"I have decided, I won't wait for dad anymore, rather, I'll find him."

"I understand, good luck on your travels, Eleanor"

"Wait, you're setting me off that easily?"

I asked, and I had to, there had to be something before the Order would let me go or does sir just think that differently compared to dad? He replied before I was able to throw my thoughts at him

"The order prohibits deep emotional connections, Eleanor, and that is for departures like yours to not affect what is currently in hand! Good luck"

"Y-yes sir..."

Of all the people to be angry it had to be Ilya's father, I know about the rules of the Order, he didn't have to raise his voice like that, geez.

"Oh and just a quick note, sir, I'm leaving by sunrise."

"Understood."

I told him just right before I was going to leave the room, hoping to catch a glance of him taking his attention away from all the papers. But that's it for that, haven't had sir Arya chew on me like dad would, that was definitely a first.

The moment I entered my room before dusk hit, I packed my bag, preparing for tomorrow. Inside were tank tops and shorts, the usual, and also a few canned food to last for the four day trip to Naïr. Right when I was done I hopped unto my bed flat, gazing upon the stars. We're always made to reflect before we go rest, and as much as I am sure of my decision, I'm still scared. Who and what I'm leaving aren't just anybody, the Order has been the past 10 years of my life. I might not meet these same people again after becoming a wanderer a couple years from now, but a decision has been made. And there's no turning back.