Let's Fake a Smile

They tell me to smile,

So I do

But how can I smile

With all this trouble in my mind

A broken gaze, a horrid day

They ask if I'm okay

And I say yes

There's demons that watch me

But that's not true

Demons don't exist

Just truth mixed with myth

At least that's what I'm told,

Because I don't know what's wrong with me

My mind is numb and my emotions deep

I want to ask but I'm too afraid

That they'll label me straight away

So many are pretentious and chea

Believing in each other's lies

But I need actual help

Unlike so many

Yet I don't raise my hand

Yet I don't speak

I want your answers, but I don't want your words

I don't want the whispers add onto my own

Deep down, I struggles

Struggle with all the trouble

Going on in my mind

I don't know if this is normal

I don't know if I'm okay

But I'll glide deep down

Push my feelings deep down

Fake a smile or two

I want to ask for help

I don't want the help that comes with help

I want to know what's wrong

I don't want them to know what's wrong

So when they tell me to smile,

I will

But I can only hope that the smile stays and doesn't turn into the pain that makes me cry for help.