A Journey into the Realm of Complete Bollocks

Superhero

I am a superhero, and my name is the Mighty Thunder Cock. I have several superpowers which are weather based, but I can only use them when my penis is engorged through sex. It gets tricky in the middle of combat. Just the other day I had to fuck America Man right up the arsehole before we could deal with a burning building, and now his arsehole is burning instead, but I did put the fire out, and he did say "put it out at any cost". Apparently he felt the cost was rather pricey, but glad that so many were saved. I don't expect another team up with America Man because of that incident. He could stop some confusion if he dressed less gay and spent less time in the gym. He could fuck a woman to, that would stop a lot of the rumour.

Last month there was a gang of muggers working in the centre of London, and I managed to corner them in one of the parks. That's when my powers went flaccid, and I could not call down lightning to strike them down. I had to fuck all five of them near to death, but they gave up in the end. The Great and Mighty Thunder Cock always gets his man and gets his fuck on at the same time.

My mighty wang can reach huge proportions. Larger than even than a horse, but for my boyfriend I only use 12 inches, which he says is about average for most men. However, when fully engorged I can cause all sorts of weather effects, wind, fog, rain, fire rain, fine rain and drizzle, but in Briton it's hard to tell if its me, or just another pissy day in England.

Its because of my powers that I get the name, Mighty Thunder Cock. As weather veins are mostly shaped like cocks and are often called weather cocks. Weather Cock Man was to mild, and so I went with the Mighty Thunder Cock because it had more pizzazz. It's so me.

What's that I hear? A police siren. Those stout, plucky coppers might need some help? Never let it be said I'm not prepared to help the filth. After all who doesn't like it filthy, and I do like a man in uniform. Right I'm off to fuck some coppers blue, up, up and Hey, Hey.