Confessions of a Student - Part 1

This is the first part of what will/might/should/probably won't become a regular series of journals, based loosely on the life of a University/College student. This is meant to be funny, but some of it will probably end up as a bit of a rant.

I must point out, that this is NOT based on my life. As I'm posting this on a University computer, I thought I'd better put in some kind of disclaimer. Just to cover myself, you understand...


Week 1 - 24/9/2001 - Moving In, Registration and Finding the Bar


Well, here I am, University at last. Either that, or I took a wrong turn and wound up in Cell Block H. There is a prison just down the road, and I think my building was built by the same people... I swear those prisoners must get bigger rooms than this. The building is huge, but the rooms themselves are tiny. The lift reminds me of The Flintstones - I swear they must have trained monkeys at the top floor pulling them up and down!

I arrived on Sunday morning, with the usual pile of boxes filled with clothes, food, and most importantly, a TV. I started to unpack, then realised I might as well do it later. Much later. Next month probably. I managed to get the TV out though, and my laptop so I could write this. It being a Sunday, there's nothing on TV, so I took a look around the flat I would be calling home for the next 9 months.

It didn't take long. A tiny kitchen, an even tinier bathroom, and a small cupboard with a bed in it. I still don't believe this can be a room. There's enough room in here for a bed, a desk, a wardrobe, and just about enough room to stand between them. My room at home is over twice this size! Every time the phone rings, I'm sure they're going to tell me they made a mistake and they're moving me to a real room. Any time now... Any time...

Ah well, while I wait, I'll tell you about the rest of my week. Registration wasn't too hard. First of all, attend a bunch of pointless lectures telling you stuff you already know. I think there was one lecture in the library, telling me where the library was! Now, you stand in a queue for an hour, sign a form that you don't have time to read, and voila! One new University student, all ready to learn. Well, ready to start drinking, anyway...

Standing in the queue made me realise just how many people are here. There must be thousands of people here! And a large number of them seem to be very, very different to what I'm used to... I saw one person who was about 7 foot tall, and another at around 4 foot. I also saw one guy smoking a spliff while he waited. Toto, we are NOT in Kansas anymore! But more on my fellow students next week, probably...

Next up, registering for my first-semester modules. Not difficult, really. Just pick everything that starts with "Introduction to..." or has the code "101" at the end. I'm not sure if that's the right way to do it, but I think I got away with it. I get the feeling not everything is going to be that easy, so I'm gonna enjoy it while I can! And they said I was too disorganised for University... I'll show them!

Okay, I have too much blood in my alcohol stream now, and I need to remedy the problem, so I'll sign off for now. I'm off to get into the University bar, and drown my sorrows. My phone call hasn't arrived yet, but hopefully by next week I'll be out of this shoebox, and into a real room! See you all next week!