It was over; no changing that. It had ended just as quickly and surprisingly as it had began. Only one week. That's all it lasted. But now it was gone. No more sweet kisses, no more awkward yet welcomed silences that all new relationships are cursed with, no more hand holding, no more quick emails just to say hey and much he missed and loved me. No more. Gone. But where could it have possibly gone? How could I have been so absurdly dense and not have seen the end approaching? Was I a fool, an idiot? Was he playing sick mind games with me the whole entire time? But how could that be true? How could the way that he looked deep into my soul with his gorgeous green eyes, the way he gently cradled me in his arms and kissed my lips, the way he looked at me and said "I love you" with so much sincerity be a lie? It was all so genuine, so believable. But where had it gone wrong?
These are all questions I pondered every day and asked myself, but never dared to ask him. My mind flashed back to that fateful day in the middle of April. The first day that I have ever gotten my heart broken. I wish that I could forget it as easy as I could recall the event, but my mind always refuses.
I had gone to Jerzy's house because he had called me and asked that I come. I never knew what was waiting for me behind those doors. If I had, I wouldn't have gone. If I had heard what was going to happen over the phone, I would have just as soon stayed home. But I didn't know, and I did go.
I slowly crossed the street and looked up and saw the big gray clouds that threatened rain. I shivered and pulled my jacket closer. As soon as Jerzy stepped outside I could sense something was terribly wrong. The air around him that usually warmed me, chilled me to the bone. He quietly kissed me on my cheek. But it wasn't a kiss. No, far, far from it. It was a mechanical thing that he was programmed to do, like a metal robot in a sick dimension. He thought that I didn't suspect a thing. He thought that I was stupid. Yeah, bull shit.
"Jess, we have to talk…" Jerzy said while he fidgeted with his dark blue jacket. He had his back to me, and yet I could still imagine the look on his face.
My feet stopped dead and wouldn't move. He turned to face me, as I put my head down to conceal the tears that threatened to run down my face.
The tone of his voice froze my heart into a solid block of black ice, and sent sharp needles into my skin. I no longer felt the radiation of warmth that I usually was with him. I could almost here the words come out of his mouth before he said them, and I wanted to turn and leave. Yet, despite my pounding heart, my legs decided to stay and here what he had to stay. In the distance I heard the light crash of thunder.
"We can't go out anymore. I don't love you like I used to. We should just be friends. You understand." The words stung my heart, and ripped my soul.
With that he kissed my cheek, squeezed my arm, and ran hurriedly to his house to get out of the heavy breeze that had suddenly erupted from the sky. I felt the sprinkle of raindrops on my cheeks, mixed in with the salty tears of sadness that began to emerge form under my closed eyes.
There I stood, tears streaming down my blotchy face, watching my "perfect soldier" walk out of my shattered life. I turned, and walking slowly in the now pouring rain, and headed out of his life for good.
Didn't he understand that he completed me? Didn't he care that with out him I was nothing? He was the final piece to finish the complex puzzle of my life. But now it was gone. All that was left was a picture that was crumbled into thousands of miscellaneous pieces that meant nothing separately. The pieces ached and yearned for the return of the final piece so that it could be complete again. But it he never would come. He was gone forever.
Why had I been so gullible? Why had I believed all of the "We will be together forever's, and the "I will love you always? I had been a fool. A 13-year-old girl blinded by what I thought was love, and the first experience that would break my heart. I guess that is why they say that only fools fall in love. But everyone falls in love, only the stupid ones are fooled by it. Or maybe they are just human.