THis is an ACTUAL e-mail I sent to one of my friends. My goodness. I don't know why I'm even putting it up here- maybe just to see what people will say about it, and maybe to fianlly once and for all cause the men in white coats to come for me. At any rate, you can read this really random e-mail and decided for yourself!

*dum dum dum dramatic music*

(Some names have been changed to protect the innocent)

*mystical voice* And now....

Like the sand through the hour-glass,
So are the Days Of Our E-mail.

Allrighty then, har har har. Random babble is fun! I send it to Nicolle ALL the time, although she never answers me anymore...*sob*
You be taking finals this week, probably too, right-o? I am, tis ICKY. Waaay to much time spent studying. In fact, I should be studying now. But I'm not, MUAHAHA. Instead, I am random babbling. Once I go, it's hard to stop! Plus, I be procrastinating, whoo hoo! Joy and love. Did you see LOTR? I hope you did, otherwise you be deprived. Just like poor Nicolle, who had not seen it last time I talked to her. Of course that was while ago since I LOST (aaaaarrrg) her number and she won't e-mail me back *cry*. What 'bout Black Hawk Down? That be good too!
I get to take an acting class! wheehee! I'm sure you care, but it's random, so it fits! class of fun! I am taking it to avoid Drama at my school with stinky Mrs. GOOBERSHLAUKIN! Mrs. Goobershlaukin from GERMANY!! EVIL Mrs. Goobershlaukin from GERMANY!! Evil Mrs. Goobershlaukin from Germany who tells us not to eat in the theater and then brings her squishy nasty TOFU blocks in to snack on while she fails at being a drama teacher! ANY way....
So, acting class! Be fun. Now I talk about something else. What shall I talk about? I shall talk Of the Rings! Cuz I LOOOOVE that movie! I get to go see it for the fourth!!! fourth!!! time on Thursday, hoooray! Fan of Legolas, right here!
Also may see Black Hawk Down again, good movie too! Hweee! (my NEW word, not that I don't have enough of those!) LOTR and BHD have something in common, they both contain- ORLANDO BLOOM!! Hooray for him and screw Josh Hartnett! Josh Hartnett be ICKY. *ahem* ...anyway.
So, yus. Yep yep yep, what shall I babble about now? hmm....let's see. I shall bash Mrs. Goobershlaukin some more, only because it is just sooo fun.
For one thing, she named her kids SIMONE and JEWELS and SPRING!!! WHAT kind of names are THOSE??? She's an ex-hippie German! *run away in TERROR!!!* Plus she's like forty-thousand years old and thinks she's about 13. Tis SCARY! We used to have to do exercises each morning where we imagined ourselves inside a pink, frilly, soft, warm, cozy, froo-froo BUBBLE that was gently floating away, away, away. GAG!!! WRECH!!! *dives under a couch in HORROR* What kind of exercises are those? Insane, ex-hippie, tofu-munching, give-strange-names-to-kids, pink-bubble-loving, spandex-wearing, wrinkled old German exercises!!! AHHH!! Run completely and totally and far far far AWAY!!
Enough on Mrs. Goobershlaukin. Don't have to think about icky her no more. because I get to go take a FUN acting class! Hooray!
Okay, now I shall talk about sooooomething else. hmm....what shall i talk about? hmm dee dummm, lezzee.... here's a random burst-
"HIGH HO SILVER- AWAY!!!!!!!!!!"
Yes, I like them random bursts. I shall have a few more, perhaps, when I can't think of anything else to say. Because I had a horse, and his name was HIGH HO SILVER!! har har har, now I'm being VARY random. Random is fuun! If I get REALLY out of ideas, I'll start speaking in Latin. Or Greek. Or Japanese. Wouldn't that be fun?? Would for me! I could start talking about Grumio, coquus latinis! But I shan't. Not yet...Mua HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!! *ahem AHEM* anyway.
Yus, so. Hmm...I wonder how many pages this be? At least, if it wasn't all one single page. Well, that made no sense. Tis pretty long anyway. What Nicolle always does when I send her something long she replies with two or three sentences, then I feel muy sad! Oh well. If my mom can talk to her mom (gooood luck) then maybe Nicolle can come what ever direction it takes to come back to California! hweee! At least for a while. Then maybe we can use my new acting-class skills and make another movie! That is, if anyone cares. Maybe a year will be enough resting time, hmm hmm hmm. Anywho, anywhy, anywhere, anywhen... hey, i like that! ANywhen. Now I can use that instead of Anywho, which stupid Stick Stickly used to say all the time. *sings* write to me, Stick Stickly, P.O. box 963! New York City, New York State, 10108!
It rhymes if you say it right., Not that you care, not that I even care! I've probably scared you enough anyhow, so I think I shall take a screwdriver and pry my fingers off of the keyboard and *shudder* arrrrgg, the hooooooooooorrrrrrooooooooooorrr!! *death*
Allrighty then, so, Now that I've, let's say a half an hour writting this, I shall go! Toodles!

High Ho SILVER!!!


I'm expecting everyone has run away in fear at this point. Just imagine if you actually recieved an e-mail like this! MOOA AAH! Beware, maybe you WILL!