THE GREAT GAS STATION SKETCH!
*Fade in, two gas stations across the street from each other. A man walks out, he is Arabian, he yells across the street*
Arabian man 1: Hey fatboy, you one crappy ass gas station owner!
*An Arabian man comes out of the opposite gas station and yells back*
Arabian man 2: Who you calling fatboy, dip shit!
Arabian man 1: You, dumbass, there ain’t no other crappy gas station owner here!
Arabian man 2: Have you looked in the mirror lately!
Arabian man 1: I’ll kick your ass!
Arabian man 2: Come here and say that!
Arabian man 1: Oh I’ll send someone!
*Arabian man 1 sends a suicide bomber over to Arabian man 2’s gas station and blows it up*
Arabian man 2: Holy Shit! You blew up my fucking gas station!
Arabian man 1: Ha ha ha ha ha, what you think now stupid, you gonna talk shit with no gas station!
Arabian man 2: Are you fucking insane! You blew up my fucking gas station!
Arabian man 1: At least you still have your sign!
Arabian man 2: Oh, thank god, now people can come and pump fire into there fucking cars! I put soda on sale, now there's no soda; the sign is useless fuck face!
Arabian man 1: The soda aint on sale anymore, it on fire, hahahaha!
Arabian man 2: You must pay!
*Arabian man 2 sends suicide bomber over to one of Arabian man 1’s pumps, then explodes*
Arabian man 1: Oh no, you blew up one of my four pumps, way to go fatboy you sure showed me! Way to go on blowing up the broken one!
*Arabian man 1 pulls out garden hose and puts out the small flames*
Arabian man 2: You gonna die bastard!
Arabian man 2: Karbeb, my son, come to me!
*Karbeb runs to Arabian man 2
Karbeb: What you want daddy!
Arabian man 2: My son, you are blessed, today you are to join Allah.
Karbeb: Dat be cool daddy!
Arabian man 2: Here, put on this vest and run to that gas station and push the button.
*Karbeb puts on the vest, he runs halfway across the street and then is his by a car that explodes and flips
Arabian man 2: Oh Jesus fucking Christ, you wait there, I get more kids!
Arabian man 2 comes back with multiple children with vests on, he sends one that is hit by a car, then another, and another, and another, and another, and another. Arabian man 2 sends multiple children at once, but they are all hit, finally he talks
Arabian man 2: Okay, all of you go at once!
*All the children run into a parade, a smoking elephant leg falls by Arabian man 2
Arabian man 2: Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck fuck fuck fuck! I FUCKING HATE YOU!
Arabian man 1: At least you still have your ice machine!
Arabian man 2: That doesn’t matter, it only release water!
Arabian man 1: Why don’t you put out the flames on your children’s backs.
*The fire consumes the whole gas station then stops burning, all that is left is a vacant lot
Arabian man 2: You know what, I don’t care, I’m just going to sit in the ruble and pray.
Arabian man 2 sits in the ruble and prays, a strange sound comes from the sky and lighting hits Arabian man 1’s gas station, blowing it up
Arabian man 1: (calmly) Oh fuck.
The end!
*Fade in, two gas stations across the street from each other. A man walks out, he is Arabian, he yells across the street*
Arabian man 1: Hey fatboy, you one crappy ass gas station owner!
*An Arabian man comes out of the opposite gas station and yells back*
Arabian man 2: Who you calling fatboy, dip shit!
Arabian man 1: You, dumbass, there ain’t no other crappy gas station owner here!
Arabian man 2: Have you looked in the mirror lately!
Arabian man 1: I’ll kick your ass!
Arabian man 2: Come here and say that!
Arabian man 1: Oh I’ll send someone!
*Arabian man 1 sends a suicide bomber over to Arabian man 2’s gas station and blows it up*
Arabian man 2: Holy Shit! You blew up my fucking gas station!
Arabian man 1: Ha ha ha ha ha, what you think now stupid, you gonna talk shit with no gas station!
Arabian man 2: Are you fucking insane! You blew up my fucking gas station!
Arabian man 1: At least you still have your sign!
Arabian man 2: Oh, thank god, now people can come and pump fire into there fucking cars! I put soda on sale, now there's no soda; the sign is useless fuck face!
Arabian man 1: The soda aint on sale anymore, it on fire, hahahaha!
Arabian man 2: You must pay!
*Arabian man 2 sends suicide bomber over to one of Arabian man 1’s pumps, then explodes*
Arabian man 1: Oh no, you blew up one of my four pumps, way to go fatboy you sure showed me! Way to go on blowing up the broken one!
*Arabian man 1 pulls out garden hose and puts out the small flames*
Arabian man 2: You gonna die bastard!
Arabian man 2: Karbeb, my son, come to me!
*Karbeb runs to Arabian man 2
Karbeb: What you want daddy!
Arabian man 2: My son, you are blessed, today you are to join Allah.
Karbeb: Dat be cool daddy!
Arabian man 2: Here, put on this vest and run to that gas station and push the button.
*Karbeb puts on the vest, he runs halfway across the street and then is his by a car that explodes and flips
Arabian man 2: Oh Jesus fucking Christ, you wait there, I get more kids!
Arabian man 2 comes back with multiple children with vests on, he sends one that is hit by a car, then another, and another, and another, and another, and another. Arabian man 2 sends multiple children at once, but they are all hit, finally he talks
Arabian man 2: Okay, all of you go at once!
*All the children run into a parade, a smoking elephant leg falls by Arabian man 2
Arabian man 2: Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck fuck fuck fuck! I FUCKING HATE YOU!
Arabian man 1: At least you still have your ice machine!
Arabian man 2: That doesn’t matter, it only release water!
Arabian man 1: Why don’t you put out the flames on your children’s backs.
*The fire consumes the whole gas station then stops burning, all that is left is a vacant lot
Arabian man 2: You know what, I don’t care, I’m just going to sit in the ruble and pray.
Arabian man 2 sits in the ruble and prays, a strange sound comes from the sky and lighting hits Arabian man 1’s gas station, blowing it up
Arabian man 1: (calmly) Oh fuck.
The end!