By Stephen Smith
May 7, 2002

Every step I take,
Just seems to be a step towards the end,
The inevitable will come,
Whether I like it or not,
Judgment will pass,
I'll be marked without mercy,
For the cruel hands that judge,
Shall never take pity,
To them I am only a soul,
Just one of the many,
Piled up in a stack,
No point in looking back,
No point to caring,
After all,
I am just a soul.
One of the many,
That comes through all the time,
I just happen to linger in the doorway,
Just one of the determined.
Determination gets you nowhere in this game,
Strife just makes you fall back behind,
I know I should just move on,
But I feel the need to stay.
It aches every time,
The pain never decreases,
I don't know why I put myself through this,
I do not matter.
Maybe if I were better,
Better on the outside,
They would take me,
I'd have a chance.
I will never achieve that way,
The only way you can,
I'm doomed to fail just like the rest,
This will be the end.
A never-ending end,
Such a struggle is vain,
Once it's all over,
I'll have no one to blame.
I probably should move on,
There is still a chance for me now,
If I stay any longer,
That chance will be gone.
It hardly exists now,
What makes me think I can go on like this?
I'll never reach nirvana this way,
I'm being passed on with rapture,
It's a false ecstasy I momentarily feel,
Soon I will wake.