*This idea is completely Unforgiven-sins idea! I thought it was bloody brilliant! My friends and I are crazy and truly morbid so I just wrote down a few of the dumb things we say and do! Enjoy and R&R and check out Unforgiven cause her's is kickass aight?! *

"They sound like a bunch of monkeys playing on garbage cans."- My thoughts on slipknot
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" Oh yes were known for Swinging in our Day!" My friend grandparents (meaning *hopefully* that they were swing dancers?)
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* At Jessica's house*
Me-"So your saying you have a huge Jesus in your backyard- this very moment?"
Jess- "Uhh yea?"
Me- "Let me at him!"
Jess-"why?"
Me-"cause I always wanted to hump Jesus!"
Jess-"No way Rae! He cost $600!"
Me-"your parents paid $600 for a life size Jesus?"
Jess-"Stupid or what?"
Me-"Can I just look?"
Jess-"yea look out the window"
Me-"Oh my Jesus- Mary AND Joseph! There are spot lights on Jesus!"
Jess- "..."
Me- "I'm gonna go to the bathroom." Leaves room and dashes outside
Jess- "RAE!"
Me- "Too late!" rubs butt on Jesus
Jess- "Lemme get the camera!"*Jessica laughing*
Me- "Jessica!" starts crying after pic is taken
Jess- "what?"
Me-"I think I'm gonna have jesus's baby!"
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Walking in the Mall
Me-* balloon under shirt* Hi Guess what?
Unknown man- What?
Me- I'm having Jesus's baby * walks away*
Unknown- "uhhh"
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Teacher- Rachael (Rae) what do you want to do when you get out of college?
Me- Hmmm (serious as possible) Become a nudist and spread the word that the aliens are coming and sell ground up paint chips.
Teacher- Not funny!
Me- I never said it was funny
Teacher- I really am sick of your funny business.
Me-Ok! Ok! I just want to become a mime!
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At lunch
Laura- "I dare you to steal the lunch tray."
Me- "and I would do this because?"
Laura- "we can glue them to the wall in Mrs. Washington's class"
Me- "You truly are a criminal mastermind"
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Mrs. Washington is truly the stupidest teacher I have ever encountered in my life. She teaches integrated science reading and math- like she actually has a degree in all of that! She cannot speak at all this is how she sounds:

Dumb teacher-"otay erybodies we funna find the veofity of de earf's 'otation."

Translation- "okay everybody, we are going to find the velocity of the earth's rotation."

This is how she talks to me whenever she would send me out for talking

Mrs.Washington- "Mrs Washington dun believe you be talking too much. Mrs. Washington knows you is smart but Mrs. Washington need you to drop that there attitude."

Okay first I laughed in her face- corrected her grammar and got sent to the dean's office and got a detention- BUT IT WAS WORTH IT!
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My mom- we have been sitting her for 2 hours and you haven't said two words to me!
Me- Penguin ... Juice...
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Jordin and Jennah= step sisters
Me- Jordin? Where is my mom?
Jordin- sexing?
Me- say what?
Jordin- SEXING!
ME- How old are you?
Jordin- sexing
Me- Yes I got the sexing part- your what 6?
Jordin- yeah I'm 6
Me- you know nothing about "sexing" Jordin.
Jordin- Nah she isn't sexing she's on the porch
*What the hell are we teaching kids these days?
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Mark= step dad
In living room hanging out with a few friends over!
Jennah- it says here if you fart 16 times a day then your healthy
Mark- WOW I must be overly healthy
Jennah- Come here Jordin!
Jordin- what?
Jennah farts on Jordin! Jesus in front of friends
Jordin- (screams- runs outside in PJ's) I smell like farts! X10
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Sitting outside after school on our stoop
Maurice(MU)- What you guys doing this weekend?
Jess- Going to an Indian Pow Wow
MU- Not uh!
Jess- Yes we are and Timmy is dressing like a cowboy!
Mu- Why a cowboy?
Jess- So he can chase the Indians
MU- They are native americans Jessica-
Me- They are bloody Indians!- *Jump and start doing my rain dance*
...people stare...
MU- You say that there and your going to get your ass whupped Rae!
Me- Whatever you need jesus *Jess and I fall on our need and start humming*
(we do this whenever either of us says "you need jesus")
Jess- Break it down Rae! Who does he need?
Me- JESUS!
Jess- Who does he want?
Me-JESUS!
Jess- who will save him?
Me- JESUS!
Jess- Damn straight!
MU- you both are going to hell, you know?
Me- bloody right we are- and we will be holding the door open for you, you flaming homosexual! (which he truly is)
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LOL what a nice way to end it...... lol just R&R and please don't take to much to offense ok? Although it happened... there is nothing u do about the bloody thing since it already happened! Anyways lol j/p go on to the 2nd chapter thingy and read oh???!!!!!!!!! Aiiiiiii!