Nobody wants to be lonely

Lyrics belongs to the song 'Nobody wants to be lonely' a duet by Ricky and Christina

            I was walking back to our dorm after working for 4 hours straight in order to finish an assignment that was due tomorrow. When I finally finished, it was already 10. Hopefully I wouldn't wake you when I open the door. As I fumbled for the keys, I noticed that the lights were not on and it was either you were asleep or out. If you were out, you were probably with him again…

            No, I've promised myself not to let that get to me. It was wrong and a bad idea. But who can I blame for unwanted adrenaline at the wrong times because of the wrong person? I can't help it… I didn't choose to be born different… or maybe it was 'just another phase'. Then again, this was too long to be a phase, it is more like an epic… but now I've accepted the fact that it is not a phase, I'm in love with you. Yeah, for your information I'm a girl. That's why it will only make sense when I say it's wrong and also the fact that we share a room on college campus…

            I finally got the right key into the lock and turned carefully. The door creaked but it was too soft to wake you. You're a pretty heavy sleeper. But you weren't in your bed. Then I noticed that the curtains were pulled back, allowing the moonlight to shine through. And you were there, sitting by the ledge, and you have been crying. I felt a pang in my heart.

There you are
In a darkened room
You are all alone
Looking out the window
Your heart is cold and lost the will to love
Like a broken arrow

            "Hey" I was lost for words… that was all I could push out my mouth.

            You looked at me, tears welled up again and you started crying. And me being the idiot just stood there, in the dark, looking at the angel weeping in the moonlight.

Here I stand in the shadows
Come to me, come to me
Can't you see that

            After a while, you stopped, though you were still sniffling, you managed to talk.

            "We broke up."

            I understood. It was a spontaneous reaction. I went to you and you gladly came into my arms. I wrapped them around you, my hold was firm and tight but gentle. Just to let you know that I wanted to protect and love you at the same time. You buried your head in my left shoulder and I felt your body shake as the tears came again. I could do nothing except to carry on holding you, hoping to take away your pain as we embraced.

            When your crying subsided, I felt a little relieved. You shifted your position so that your back was against me and I was up against the wall, sitting on the ledge. You gestured for me to hold you and I did. You leaned back against me and I heard you whisper.

            "Thank you"

            "Anytime…"

            Then your hand found mine. With our fingers intertwined, we spent a moment looking out the window. Though I had you in my arms, I knew I could never have you… it was impossible. I've seen the guys you dated and your boyfriends. The way you look at them, the way they look at you… I don't blame them. You're gorgeous.

Nobody wants to be lonely
Nobody wants to cry
My body's longing to hold you
So bad it hurts inside
Time is precious and it's slipping away
And I've been waiting for you all of my life
Nobody wants to be lonely, so why
Why don't you let me love you

            I got a glance at my wristwatch and found that it was 11:30 already. When I looked down, I saw that you had fallen asleep. I found myself staring at you, I couldn't tear my eyes off you. No matter how many times I scolded myself that this was wrong, I always gave in to that want in my heart. It ached when I couldn't hold you. I could feel tears when I thought of you and the fact that you can never love me. But I never did cry… I wanted to be strong… for you.

            As I was lost in my own thoughts, I could stand it no longer… I leaned nearer to you, so near I could feel your breath on me. I was frightened that you would wake up any second…

            "I love you." I whispered and hugged you a little tighter. As much as I wished that you heard that, I wished you didn't as well. But those words have been locked in my heart for so long…

Can you hear my voice
Do you hear my song
It's a serenade
So your heart can find me

            Then the next thing I know, you were staring back at me. Oh shit…

            "Is that true?" you got up, moving away from me. It hurt when your warmth left me.

            "Huh? What?" I tried to play innocent.

            "Don't pretend, you're a bad actor…" you could always see through me… maybe you already know how I felt for you…

            "Yes… I love you." I finally answered, but it came out nearly as a whisper. I felt tears well up again. Shit again…

            I couldn't hold them back this time, they flowed like a river down my cheeks.


And suddenly you're flying down the stairs
Into my arms baby

            Then I felt your hand rubbing the tears away. I looked up, teary eyed, my vision was blurry but I could tell that you were in front of me, very close. So close I could feel your breath on my face. Our faces were never this close before. My emotions were all jumbled up, confusion, pain, love, fright and every other shit I was feeling. I blinked, clearing my vision and I could see tears in your eyes again as well.

Before I start going crazy
Run to me, run to me
'Cause I'm dying

            I reached out and wiped your tears away. As I did so, you closed your eyes. I took it as a sign. I closed my eyes and leaned forward… and then…

            Magic…

            The moment that I've dreamt of and fantasized of for so long… I wish that this moment would last forever, for there would be no other like it. I can't describe what I feel, imagine finally getting a drink of water after being lost in the desert for days, imagine finding the last piece of the jigsaw puzzle that you've been hunting for so long to finish it, imagine, imagine being complete after years of emptiness…

            Then you pulled away. I looked at you, I did not know what to say… then you moved away…

            "This is wrong," you said. That hurt, it felt like I just got a shock treatment. I still couldn't say a thing.

            "I can't… I can't… I'm sorry…" you said, and you started crying again. By now, my tears were dried up and all I could do was sit there and stare at you.

Nobody wants to be lonely
Nobody wants to cry
My body's longing to hold you
So bad it hurts inside
Time is precious and it's slipping away
And I've been waiting for you all of my life
Nobody wants to be lonely, so why
Why don't you let me love you

            Finally I spoke up, "Why won't you let me love you?"

            "It's wrong…"

            I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. Then I heard the door open and close. I opened my eyes and you were gone… I thought of that kiss we just had… it was perfect. I know you have feelings for me, I could feel you. You kissed back, you knew how I felt and you understood.

            "Don't leave me…"

I wanna feel you deeply
Just like the air you're breathing
I need you here in my life
Don't walk away, don't walk away, don't walk away, don't walk away
No no no no

THE END