This Puzzle

By Tara Nicole Walker

8.29.2002

Scattered here before me

Are pieces of my dreams

Pieces of me

Parts of my world

This is

The puzzle of my life

Every piece

A different something

Another nothing

One more part

Of me

What goes where?

And when?

These answers

Yet elude me

They stand just beyond

My desperate grasp

Like things my eyes long for

Just beyond the light

I'm lost from myself

In this maze

That is truly

Everything I am

Not two pieces connect

Or even fit together

Truly in the right way

I clutch at the blindfold

That covers my eyes

My desperate eyes

My needing eyes

My longing eyes

And as I cry

I hear someone

Laugh

And I realize

That the voice

Is my own

The other part of me

That stands adrift

On her hollow raft

Of evil pleasure

She knows how I fit together

To become me

To become one

To be whole

Yet she lends not

A helping hand

Not an encouraging word

Nor a soft whisper

A simple

Harsh laugh

Echoes in my ears

The glee of Me

I blindly feel around

For a piece

To start with

Something to begin with

The piece is my heart

It does not fit with my mind

My mind does not fit

With my soul

My soul does not fit

With my logic

And my logic

Does not fit with my heart

I fumble once again

And find

My man

But my man does not fit

With my heart

But he fits with

My mind

I reach and find love

With another man' name

But he fits

With my heart

I fumble again

Confused and heartbroken

My dreams remain shattered

My fantasies unfulfilled

My soul still unshaken

This is what I live

Day by day

Hour by hour

This is what

Life consists of

The search

For the one piece

That will bring

This puzzle

Together