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A. Gray

VIRG!

8/1/2012 #301
Nesasio

Man, I was really tubby last summer. *cringe*

8/1/2012 #302
inwardtransience
Caught in ice so she stares, stares at nothing. I can help her but won't, now she hates me. Did she call me name? I think it's gonna rain, oh, when I die.

Seriously I love this song :D

8/1/2012 #303
A. Gray

me to!

I've lost 23 in a year... that sound so fail...

8/1/2012 #304
Nesasio

It's funny 'cause I haven't even lost that much weight. I've just been exercising more so I replaced it with more muscle in my legs especially so I'm more trim.

That and I wore some really unattractive outfits whenever someone else had the camera. XD So it was like enhanced flab.

8/1/2012 #305
Rogue Energizer Bunny

I'm so mad right now that I can't even express it in words. They don't come home until 8 fucking o'clock, and then they try to micro-manage me? No. If I'm not your priority anymore, that's fine, but in the fucking two hours I see you I want to talk to you, not be called lazy. I hate this house. I miss them.

8/1/2012 #306
inwardtransience

I'm trying to lose weight. My heart doctor told me to, how sad is that? XD

8/1/2012 #307
Nesasio

I've lost about 15 pounds. It fluctuates 'cause I have a kinda horrible habit of enjoying cake and stuff at like 3AM and I work around food so there's that problem too. But just think how much worse I'd be if I didn't bike to work and spend all my time on my feet, haha.

8/1/2012 #308
Nesasio

@ Livia: Who's that?

8/1/2012 #309
A. Gray

i got diagnosed with depression, and then the doc said to loose weight so I am. Changed my life style.

8/1/2012 #310
A. Gray

That sucks liv. Maybe write them a letter so they understand?

8/1/2012 #311
Nesasio

I've had depression for ages. I self-manage it pretty well, but the last few months have been rough. I took up meditation and that helped. I've been meaning to take up yoga again but then I'd have to get up earlier and let's be honest, I like sleep. So it hasn't happened yet, haha.

8/1/2012 #312
Rogue Energizer Bunny

My motherfucking parents.

8/1/2012 #313
A. Gray

I did counciling, and am medicating. April I am supposed to start weening off drugs so I can get off them.

8/1/2012 #314
inwardtransience

Three girls with depression in a row. I'm in therapy and I've been medicated since I was seventeen.

8/1/2012 #315
A. Gray

we are rocing this metal shit!

8/1/2012 #316
A. Gray

wow I really meant mental....

8/1/2012 #317
Nesasio

There've been a few times when I probably should've been on medication but never was. I mean, I've never been suicidal or anything like that. It's just always a constant thing and has been since I was in middle school and some times it's worse than others. I think I'm doing better, though. It's nice to have something to look forward to and even though I have no idea what I'll do for a job when I move, at least I'll be out on my own and more in control. That'll be nice.

I've been thinking I might want to write for a job. I dunno, though. I never saw myself as a professional writer because I just do it for fun and I'm really not that great. But at least it'd be something I enjoy doing and hell if I'm gonna get a job in my actual field anytime soon without grad school. Maybe in a couple years I'll know wtf I'm doing. XD

8/1/2012 #318
inwardtransience

Metal works :D

What's the difference I'll die in this sick world of mine

Seriously Alice in Chains kicks so much ass.

8/1/2012 #319
A. Gray

only reason I am alive today is because of my duaghter. I was bad and wanted to die in a bad way after I had her. but I didn't think my hubby could properly care for her and I didn't want to leave her with him. I was wanting to kill her then kill me, but I could never bring myself to actually kill my sweet girl.

8/1/2012 #320
Nesasio

Eep, post-partum? Or just the stress aggravated the original depression?

8/1/2012 #321
A. Gray

I first considered suicide in elementry school. my councilor said that was really abnormal...

8/1/2012 #322
Rogue Energizer Bunny
Maybe write them a letter so they understand?

No, because I'm so dramatic and acting out for attention. I talked to Mom about stuff and she said we'd go to church more often, and never spoke about it again.

We didn't even go to church.

8/1/2012 #323
A. Gray

aggravated the depression.

8/1/2012 #324
A. Gray

do you have another family member that ou could talk to that might be more willing to listen?

8/1/2012 #325
A. Gray

bith control makes me insanely crazy too... think it's hormones.

8/1/2012 #326
Nesasio

I was lucky that I discovered fanfiction before I started to get depressed. I just channeled all my negative emotions into the writing and took it out on the characters. Probably saved me all sorts of self-loathing and self-injury. It probably would've scared the shit out of my parents if I ever let them read my writing, though. It's actually tame by comparison now. Better written, haha, but not as violent.

8/1/2012 #327
inwardtransience
I first considered suicide in elementry school. my councilor said that was really abnormal...

I first considered in elementary school, passively attempted in middle school, and actively attempted at high school. So yay me.

8/1/2012 #328
Rogue Energizer Bunny
do you have another family member that ou could talk to that might be more willing to listen?

I don't know. Dad's out of the state, grandparents are too.

8/1/2012 #329
A. Gray

even then just talking to one of them could help not only in letting it out to a party that might understand, but if they are subtle they might be able to hint talk to the folks and get them to see a bit of reason.

8/1/2012 #330
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