The Roadhouse
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Thoughtful Silence

Don't get me wrong... I do love some of John Woo's films... and he can definitely get away with a few slow-motion shots of doves :)

What d'ya got against Michael Bay? Do you not like the 'in-your-face' effects?

Uwe Boll though... my definite vote for one of the worst Directors... ever.

7/16/2008 #31

*falls asleep on the floor*

7/17/2008 #32
Violent Messiah

I don't know exactly why I don't like Bay, really...its just the hollow feeling I get after seeing one of his films, you know? All flash, no substance is what his films scream to me.

As for Uwe Boll, that guy cracks me up. I've never seen a director actually revel in his mediocrity, or have his level of denial. Did you ever hear of the time he challenge some of his critics to boxing matches as a sort of defense for his movies? Of course one of the qualifications to be allowed to fight him was that the critic could have no boxing experience and had to not exceed certain physical conditions, so you got several thin pasty weak looking guys that had probably never been in a real fight in their lives. Real threats, eh?

What Boll neglected to mention was that he had boxed extensively in college, so the result was him pounding the poor schmucks for a while. Then he had the nerve to proclaim that since he defeated his critics, he proved his films did indeed not suck. Nutty, ain't he? -=x

7/17/2008 #33

*still sleeping on the floor like a drunkie*

7/17/2008 #34
Thoughtful Silence

I get where you're coming from 'bout Bay... like, while I didn't dislike The Rock, there was just something about it... though, that did have Sir Sean Connery in it, so, kudos :) Then again, John Woo did Broken Arrow didn't he? That was a bit too much all action, no substance, in my opinion.

Uwe Boll, though... he must live in his own little world.

By the by, I thought it was funny that someone with your penname (which reflects your work, I've been reading) to review... what was it... Third Time's the Charm? :)


7/19/2008 #35
Violent Messiah

The movie industry would be a much better place if Boll really did live on his own world, far away from video game licenses he could turn into crap movies. -=x

7/19/2008 . Edited 7/19/2008 #36
Violent Messiah

"By the by, I thought it was funny that someone with your penname (which reflects your work, I've been reading) to review... what was it... Third Time's the Charm? :)


Heh...yeah, I know. Ah well, we all need to branch out now and then, right?

Besides, it was a nice little tale. Of course, if the character had hunted down her ex best friend and slit her throat at the end, well...that would've earned it bonus points from me. Ha!

And yeah, Broken Arrow isn't one of my favorite Woo examples. I prefer his Hong Kong stuff over his Hollywood stuff, although Face Off and MI:2 were fairly decent. Not as good as The Killer or Hard Boiled, but all right. Oh, and sorry about the double posts, guys. Power outage when I was sending...whoops. -=x

7/19/2008 . Edited 7/19/2008 #37

*stares at air*

7/19/2008 #38

VM and Silence-

Thought I would speak up from behind the bar. Saw ya'll were mentioning a guy who has earned my ire, Mr. Boll. Have some news clippings for you to read. Lemme find 'em... here we go:

(From Wikipedia) When rumors surfaced that Boll had expressed interest in a Metal Gear Solid movie, and claimed to have been given a script to read, Metal Gear creator Hideo Kojima responded in his audioblog HIDECHAN, "Absolutely not! I don't know why Uwe Boll is even talking about this kind of thing. We've never talked to him. It's impossible that we'd ever do a movie with him."

and thats not all-

MTV Movies Blog suggests, "If you’re not going to make a faithful adaptation, why make an adaptation at all?" Blizzard Entertainment refused Boll's request to make a World of Warcraft adaptation in a most critical manner... Boll says, "I got in contact with Paul Sams of Blizzard, and he said, 'We will not sell the movie rights, not to you... especially not to you,"

That says it all. I cannot stand that man's attitude, or his work.

I'm gonna go nudge dreamer999, make sure she's still awake.

7/19/2008 #39
Violent Messiah

"We will never sell the movie rights, not to you...especially not to you."

Heh...that one cracked me up. Good to see game companies realizing that Boll is not the one to let handle their license, not if they care about quality over the little money that Boll will offer them. Maybe there's still hope for a good movie based on a video game. I know the upcoming Street Fighter movie won't be it, but maybe the Max Payne movie...that one won't be by Boll, I do believe. Actually, that one should be a Woo movie, no doubt...the game itself borrows a few ideas from Woo, so it would be a natural fit. Ah well...

Oh yeah, I almost forgot...this is kinda funny. I just put up a new story...

(Shameless Promotion! Go check out my first crack at fantasy, Heaven's Requiem: The Forsaken. We now return you to our regularly scheduled conversation.)

...and had someone with the nerve to use my review section to promote their story. Can you believe that? Cheeky little monster. -=p

7/20/2008 #40
Thoughtful Silence

"We will never sell the movie rights, not to you...especially not to you."

Ha, sounds 'bout right. *pictures a Metal Gear Movie by Boll... and dies a little inside* But, VM, I concur 'bout the Max Payne/ John Woo combination, that would at least have had a CHANCE of being good.

Heh for shameless plugs huh :) But I checked the said review... and it doesn't even MENTION your story... that just aint right. By the by, also noticed on your profile that you support Manchester United *shakes head* Dude, that's just ain't cool :P

EDIT: At least you call the game FOOTBALL though! :P

7/20/2008 . Edited 7/20/2008 #41
Violent Messiah

"By the by, also noticed on your profile that you support Manchester United *shakes head* Dude, that's just ain't cool :P"

Ha! What are you, some kind of Chelsea or Liverpool fan or something? J/K

Heh...seriously though, I have a really good reason for supporting Man U. A few years ago, I was in a really bad accident and had to stay in the hospital for a few months. I couldn't walk, so other then physical therapy I was forced to lay in bed and either read or watch TV. When I watched TV, there was really nothing on so I surfed a lot, and eventually wound up on the Fox Soccer Channel. Now it should be noted that before this experience, I never really cared for the sport at all, but I was bored so I gave it a look.

Long story short, I watched the match, a Man U. game (I think it was versus Chelsea, not sure) and got caught up in the pace and excitement of the game. By the end of the game, I was in love with the sport and couldn't get enough. I watched all the matches I could during my stay, and decided I liked the Barclay's Premiere league the best (followed closely by La Ligue...go U.M.A.C. Pumas!) and since Man U. was the team that turned me on to football, I just naturally supported them. This support became cemented when I finally went to my first live match at Old Trafford...the noise and level of excitement surpassed something like an American football Superbowl, and it was just a friendly match! I got totally hooked and became a loyal Man. U supporter, although I do follow a number of other teams in different leagues.

As for the kid that guerrilla advertised their story on my review page? Yeah, that was bold beyond belief, and probably should've earned them a verbal slap down, but I was nice and referred them to The Roadhouse instead. Ain't I sweet? -=x

7/20/2008 #42
Thoughtful Silence

Arsenal fan actually :) Though I mainly follow the Scottish league... 'cause I'm Scottish... I feel like an idiot after that sentence :)

But, I could forgive you for supporting a bad team after that explanation... but Man U? Sorry dude, but that's unforgivable! J/k

"probably should've earned them a verbal slap down,"

That cracked me up. It's true though, ya gotta be bold/ desperate to attempt that kinda craic. On someone I know's page, get this, someone reviewed like 'yeah that was good. Tell me what you think 'bout my poem' then frickin' posted the entire poem on the review page with two random line breaks between each line!

By the by, I'm on chapter seven of your story... uh... 'An Anti Hero's Tale'. Just wanted to ask... have you seen a film called Shaun of the dead perhaps? And did ya notice my little subliminal message there! :P

- Silence

7/21/2008 . Edited 7/21/2008 #43
Violent Messiah

Ah, a Gunner's fan. Heh, I thought for sure it was gonna be Man U. and the Gunners battling for the both the premiere chamiponship and the UEFA cup, but in both instances, they choked. What happened? And the fact that a fellow Scot runs Man U. gets no love for the Red Devils, eh? Tough crowd...-=)

"On someone I know's page, get this, someone reviewed like 'yeah that was good. Tell me what you think 'bout my poem' then frickin' posted the entire poem on the review page with two random line breaks between each line!"

OK, that's pretty nervey, too. Jeez, what's wrong with some people these days? *shakes head*

As for Shaun of the Dead, I did finally look at it not too long ago. I resisted for the longest because I didn't think a zombie movie needed to mix with comedy or it wound up looking stupid, but I changed my mind after seeing it. Yeah, it was silly but it had all the good hallmarks of a good zombie tale, plus classic memorable lines. All in all, one of my favorite zombie/infected movies, right up there with 28 Days/Weeks Later, Night of the Living dead (the original and the 70's remake) and Dawn of the dead (original and 04 remake).

My least favorite? That's easy...House of the Dead. Damn that Boll.

By the way, is my story being compared to Shaun of the Dead? If so, I'm taking that as a compliment, even if it wasn't meant as one. -=x

7/22/2008 #44

"The original script took the Alone In the Dark premise and depicted it as if it were actually based on a true story of a private investigator in the northeastern U.S. whose missing persons cases begin to uncover a disturbing paranormal secret. It was told through the eyes of a writer following Edward Carnby and his co-worker for a novel, and depicted them as real-life blue-collar folks who never expected to find hideous beings waiting for them in the dark. We tried to stick close to the H. P. Lovecraft style and the low-tech nature of the original game, always keeping the horror in the shadows so you never saw what was coming for them. Thankfully Dr. Boll was able to hire his loyal team of hacks to crank out something much better than our crappy story and add in all sorts of terrifying horror movie essentials like opening gateways to alternate dimensions, b*** blonde archaeologists, sex scenes, mad scientists, slimy dog monsters, special army forces designed to battle slimy CG dog monsters, Tara Reid, "Matrix" slow-motion gun battles, and car chases. Oh yeah, and a ten-minute opening back story scroll read aloud to the illiterate audience, the only people able to successfully miss all the negative reviews. I mean hell, Boll knows that's where the real scares lie..."

--From the creators of the video game "Alone In The Dark", which I actually enjoyed playing.

That's awesome.

7/22/2008 #45


7/22/2008 #46

I'll act like a drunkie then OOH AAH!!

Then he sat on me for not being flexible enough thenI got chased by a crazy lady and then when I was back I got punched in the face and he tried tearing my arm and leg off

7/22/2008 #47
Violent Messiah

*makes mental note to cut dreamer off*

And Dolvich, that was hilarious. I always like the story of the games, and was pissed when I saw what Boll reduced it to. I mean, I knew what was coming when I heard he was attached to the project, but still...the depths of its absolute suckiness astounded me. Although I'm mentions "b*** blonde archeologists" and "Tara Reid", right? How come she gets mentioned twice? Did they really hate her that much? -=x

7/22/2008 #48
Thoughtful Silence

*Wonders what the definition for 'cut off' is for one named Violent Messiah :P*

I repeat VM's sentiments. Pretty much word for word actually.... nothing to add :) Though, I didn't know Tara Reid was an archeologist? j/k

*leaves pub wondering just how much he drank*

EDIT: @ VM: By the by, Shaun of the Dead mention was a compliment!

7/22/2008 . Edited 7/22/2008 #49
Violent Messiah

"*Wonders what the definition for 'cut off' is for one named Violent Messiah :P*"

Ha! Didn't think about it like that at first, but now that you mention it...let's just say its good to have options. Heh.

"EDIT: @ VM: By the by, Shaun of the Dead mention was a compliment!"

Woohoo! The latest chapter of An Anti Hero's Tale is up (not to mention Heaven's Requiem...I was pretty busy!), by the way, so go check it out! -=)

7/23/2008 #50
Thoughtful Silence

*let's just say its good to have options*

.... .... .... Too cliched to go for the old 'gulp'?

*Woohoo! The latest chapter of An Anti Hero's Tale is up (not to mention Heaven's Requiem...I was pretty busy!), by the way, so go check it out! -=)*

Heh, will do. Though I haven't even read chapter ONE of Heaven's Requiem yet 'cause I saw t'was like 4000 words long :) And since it's like 3:16am where I am now, I think that'll need to wait... I like my eyes not being mush! But I shall check it out later. I'll be sure to check out An Anti Hero's Tale (I actually just copy and pasted that 'cause I'm so darned lazy!) though. I'll probably have a nice scathing review all primed and ready for ya tomorrow.

- Silence

7/23/2008 #51
Violent Messiah

Yeah, I'm beginning to think the word count for Heaven's Requiem is scaring potential readers off. I find this ironic as the secondary purpose of this site, after the primary function of writing that is, is to read. Ah well...if this persists, I may slice the chapters into smaller sizes like An Anti Hero's Tale.

Speaking of which, I look forward to your honest review! -=x

Oh, and on a totally different subject...a friend who reads everything I write, stuff on this site and others and stuff I haven't even posted yet, pointed out something I had never noticed till now. Remember how we talked about Woo's signature use of doves and pigeons? Well, turns out I have a signature as well, one I wasn't aware of till she proved it to me.

Turns out the main female lead in all of my stories is almost always a red head! At first I didn't believe it, but turns out its true. Sara from An Anti Hero's Tale? Red head. Gabrielle from Heaven's Requiem? Ditto. Katja from those two short stories and an upcoming full story, The Things They Say About Her? You guessed And there are other examples. I just never noticed till now. Weird, huh? -=x

7/24/2008 . Edited 7/24/2008 #52


7/24/2008 #53

I feel lonely =(

7/24/2008 #54

Now everyone left because I'm here...

7/24/2008 #55
Violent Messiah

I didn't leave, dreamer...I just never know how to respond to your train of thought. -=)

Anyways, I'm seriously wondering if I should be so honest in my reviews, and if people really want honesty or just someone to tell them their story is perfect like their friends and family probably do. I ask this because now I have this kid that hijacked my review page for a story trying to get people to read theirs. I figure what the hell, I'll read it and give them what they want, a review. The only problem was the story? To put it kindly, it was a hot mess.

So I tried to be kind and give some helpful constructive criticism to possibly make their story better, right? And what do I get in return? Them flamming one of my stories, The Morning After, in retaliation. Nice, huh? -=x

So remind me again why I try to be helpful?

7/24/2008 #56

Hey y'all.

Umm, so I'm just kinda jumpin into the conversation here, but [ignore me if you don't want my advice] some people are just idiots. If they can't take the criticism, then that's their problem. Don't stop being helpful, or the people that actually want help will be sad.

7/24/2008 #57
Chidori Nadare

Well, at least there's still some people left who appreciate honest feedback...

(I'm so sorry if I suddenly joined the conversation...)

7/24/2008 #58
Thoughtful Silence

@ VM: Heh, I read your review of that guy... it cracked me up :) But his reviewof yours... didn't even really make sense :/ Don't worry, I'm still working on that honest review for ya... I am just actually having problems finding faults I haven't already pointed out!!

- But 'idiots' isn't quite the word I would use :) Though I've never had someone complain 'bout my constructive contricism yet...probably as I try and sugarcoat it 'cause I know I sure as heck can't take criticism well.

7/25/2008 #59

I just read the review... hahahaha. The review that they left on The Morning After didn't really make sense. I liked it.

I like people that know how to do good criticism, and sometimes it has to be harsh. It's just necessary sometimes

7/25/2008 #60
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