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Jade Lin Zheng

I have such a confusing life. Maybe if I weren't such a curious kid I would've never ended up the way I did... I could blame it all on my parents for divorcing... I could blame it all on my sister for not being a better role model... I could blame it all on mom's three miscarriages... I have valid things I can blame them on, yet I place all the blame on myself. I was born a girl, and dad left and now has two sons, and I blame myself for not being born a guy... My sister is a loner, video game-freak, graphics designer, but she has a violent streak that makes her a tough girl. And because mom had to work nearly all day she was the only person I had to look up to. I went a little too far and became a personality clone of her. Now that I'm older I'm beginning to doubt things, but without my sister's personality I have no idea who I am... Help?

7/16/2009 #1
PinkPunches

Wow...Im sorry to say I can't compare to any of that, but it felt good to get it out, didn't it? My parent's aren't divorced, I'm the older sister, my mom doesn't work, and no miscariges. Maybe your sister doesn't realize you need to look up to her, maybe she thinks you've grown up well and don't need her anymore.

My life is different. , I feel lonely, I eat when I'm lonely, so I feel fat, and I have not frickin clue what I am. Every school I go to I have a chance to restart. I'm always somthing different. A popluar, nerd, misfit, whatever. Because I want to know how different groups feel. That means I have really bad split personalities. I have no clue what to do, everyone I know is dating someone except me, and I'm living in a different country.

Maybe you just need to relax. It sometimes works for me.

9/17/2009 . Edited 7/6/2011 #2
J-and-Z-Forever

Wow. To me, my story sounds like a comedy, and yours sounds like a really bad tragedy. Sorry to hear about those things :(

I am 14, and my dad was a Marine (still is i guess ^.- ) and he got diagnosed with cancer. At this time, this guy asked me out, but my parents dont allow me to go steady or anything, so i was "forced" to decline. I really liked him as a friend, and i thought that the whole question wouldnt ruin it. But it did. Everything went downhill, starting with that, then my dad's cancer. He ended up asking a girl the next week, she said yes. Few people know about my dad and some really care, and whats sad is that they arent even my close friends. My close friends just say "He'll do fine" or something, but its like they just want to avoid it or something. IDK... my dad is getting worse because of the cancer. He's grumpier, angrier, and just always busy with work. It may not be as bad, but it still bugs me. :(

6/9/2011 #3
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