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dbz 77
Why is r*** a much more sensitive subject to write about than murder?

Michael

8/26/2007 #1
GlossSplinter
Because victims of r*** live to talk about it. Also, r*** is much more embarrassing, and has more issues involved with it. People are afraid of being r***, but if you get killed it won't matter afterwards. And it's also one of the easier ways to die, and death is inevitable. Good question.
9/22/2007 . Edited 9/22/2007 #2
dbz 77
Because victims of r*** live to talk about it. Also, r*** is much more embarrassing, and has more issues involved with it. People are afraid of being r***, but if you get killed it won't matter afterwards. And it's also one of the easier ways to die, and death is inevitable. Good question.

R*** is an attack on the v***; that has everything to do with all the psychological and emotional issues.

Michael

9/23/2007 #3
SplintofGrass
I don't believe I understand what you mean.
9/23/2007 #4
dbz 77
I don't believe I understand what you mean.

The p*** is the instrument of r***.

The v*** is the target of r***.

Michael

9/24/2007 #5
SplintofGrass
Not nessassarily. There are a lot of cases where that does not apply.
9/25/2007 #6
aka Providence
The p*** is the instrument of r***.

The v*** is the target of r***.

let me be blunt in response: yaoi buttsecks r***.

not all r*** victims are women, duhr.

10/3/2007 . Edited 10/3/2007 #7
Christy Leigh Stewart
Also, women have been known to r*** men
11/22/2007 #8
Rose Valentine

R*** - you live to tell the pain

Murder - you haunt to tell the pain

4/8/2008 #9
Cardboard Tube Knight

When the r*** victims is alive after, their mind is forever undergoing the events of what happened to them. Its a mental scar and a type that doesn't easily fade and never goes away completely.

4/8/2008 #10
Christy Leigh Stewart

And it's different if you murdered someone?

4/8/2008 #11
Cardboard Tube Knight

Of course, I can murder someone and they'll be dead, their suffering ended. There can also be many circumstances surrounding a murder. Say you're robbing someone and they spook you so you kill them. Its not a good reason to kill because you shouldn't be robbing either. But r*** is the crime itself, r*** is a means to an end. Sometimes there might be murder, either to silence the witness or to get off. But r*** as a crime occurs out of some sick power trip. It's not like murder in most ways. Likewise the victim of murder ALWAYS dies because murder is death of the person. The family might be traumatized by the death, but its victim is moved on. In r*** the victim and everyone around them feels it. I've know a girl who was r***, they change. And you feel it every time you're near them. Every time you look at them.

4/8/2008 #12
Christy Leigh Stewart

I think you are underestimating the trauma someone goes through when they have had a loved one dies. People can come back from a r***, you can never get back what you had with the person who has died.

4/8/2008 #13
William H. Chang

Personally I think it'll depend on the person. Someone who's experienced a death, say in the family or of someone close, due to a murder will probably never really want to read about a topic like that. No Raymond Chandler novels for them. Whereas victims of r*** will feel the same way about that kind of topic. Either way, it brings up painful memories.

When it comes to writing about either of those issues, I think with murder there tends to be more of a suspension of disbelief due to murder and death being so prominent in mainstream media (i.e. film, video games, etc.). We're used to the idea of people killing other people because we see it and/or hear about it all the time, though often it's in a fictional sense. R***, on the other hand, is a touchy topic because it happens so often on a very real scale. It's scary, if you think about it. I do agree that r*** is much more psychologically damaging to its victims than murder, and because the victims survive to relive the experience over and over (mentally) that's what makes it so damaging. It's difficult to write about such a thing too, given that it almost feels disrespectful to be writing about a fictional r*** when so many people have actually suffered through it.

Not to downplay the trauma and suffering of a murder, but r***, in my opinion, is often times a much worse crime.

4/10/2008 #14
dbz 77

When it comes to writing about either of those issues, I think with murder there tends to be more of a suspension of disbelief due to murder and death being so prominent in mainstream media (i.e. film, video games, etc.). We're used to the idea of people killing other people because we see it and/or hear about it all the time, though often it's in a fictional sense. R***, on the other hand, is a touchy topic because it happens so often on a very real scale. It's scary, if you think about it. I do agree that r*** is much more psychologically damaging to its victims than murder, and because the victims survive to relive the experience over and over (mentally) that's what makes it so damaging. It's difficult to write about such a thing too, given that it almost feels disrespectful to be writing about a fictional r*** when so many people have actually suffered through it.

I do notice there are far more movies about serial killers than serial rapists.

Michael

4/10/2008 #15
xLinkinPark94x

R***, you live to tell the tale and it's much more traumatizing. It can completely destroy someone's ability to trust, love, or basically be a human being. Crying themselves to sleep every night, being haunted with the memory for the rest of your life, not being able to trust even the people you know would die before they hurt you, etc., etc.

With murder, you don't live to tell the tale You're not traumatized by the event. You're just...gone. Not much more to it really. Depends on how you get murdered actually. It could traumatize the people around you.

-Kelli

5/10/2008 #16
dbz 77

R***, you live to tell the tale and it's much more traumatizing. It can completely destroy someone's ability to trust, love, or basically be a human being. Crying themselves to sleep every night, being haunted with the memory for the rest of your life, not being able to trust even the people you know would die before they hurt you, etc., etc.

With murder, you don't live to tell the tale You're not traumatized by the event. You're just...gone. Not much more to it really. Depends on how you get murdered actually. It could traumatize the people around you.

The fact that r*** causes huge psychological and emotional trauma has been known since antiquity; the Hebrew Scriptures even describe it briefly.

But why does it cause such trauma? How does what is essentially a forcible insertion of one body part into another body part cause such trauma? Has anyone ever explained the mechanics of how that particular act causes so much trauma?

Michael

6/3/2010 #17
suasoria

I think it's pretty much a loss of control that makes r*** so traumatic. Out of everything in the world, one's own body is pretty much the only thing that they have full control over and to have someone take over that control and to have their body respond involuntarily to the act just blows. R*** is pretty much stealing one's power, world view, self-worth, and so much more.

6/15/2010 #18
GimpsUnlimited

IMO, r*** is not only a physical abuse of a woman, but it is also seen as a cowardly act by a man against a defenseless woman. Whereas murder is just murder.

5/12/2011 #19
pradlee

As many others have said, murder victims don't live (in our world at least- maybe there is an afterlife in which they are still affected by their murders) afterwards, while r*** victims are alive afterwards, with all the emotional and psychological and physical damage that accompanies it (although this would also plague the victim of an attempted murder).

R*** is also the last thing you want to happen to yourself, even more than dying, which will eventually happen anyway- it creates social stigma around you. In some cultures, r*** victims are faulted, instead of the rapists, with the r***, as if they were somehow being teases and 'asking for it'.

Murder is presented as being very impersonal- you can murder someone in a variety of ways from halfway around the world, but r*** is up close and personal. It is a physical and emotional invasion, it is not over quickly, it makes the victim feel powerless and hurt and fearful of what else could be done to hir.

However, in my opinion, murder and r*** should be equally sensitive to write about. Unlike just killing someone, which connotes dehumanization of the victim and a lack of caring for hir individuality and self, both murder and r*** are focused on a specific person and are very personal attacks. They are equally invasive of privacy, safety, comfort, power over oneself.

6/7/2011 #20
Luna S. R

Murder can be viewed as a cowardly act against someone else too. And remember, not just girls have this happen. I mean, perhaps for a guy it would be even worse. You have to think about the age old stereotypes of men most be strong and women weak. For a girl it's almost as if life is just blowing it up in your face how "weak" you really are and how powerless because you're female. For a guy it's almost unbelievable. It's more like, "How could this happen to me? I'm a guy, this sort of stuff happens to girls. I'm not weak...am I?" And the other things that can circulate around this depending on who the r*** was. Like losing faith in your sexuality even, as odd as that might sound, but it happens.

Of course I'm not saying that just 'cause your a guy you'd be worse off or the trauma would be worse than if you were a female, but you might feel worse off and feel even less inclined to talk about it.

6/20/2011 . Edited 6/20/2011 #21
Luna S. R

Now that I think about it, I feel a bit more weary of what I write, I mean, I know that r*** and murder is bad. I haven't written any murder stories, yet (I'm working on a few about war and all wars include murder.) But I have written a story about r*** and thought about a few other ones. I honestly don't know why this pops up in my writing so much (never had it happen to me, so I honestly don't know and worry for my mental health.) but it is a rather interesting and touchy subject. I mean, no one knows what exactly goes through the mind of the victim unless you too have been one. I guess what interest me is the unknowns. What goes through the victims and antagonists heads? How would I feel if this happened to me? I have thought about this really hard before, but could only come up with, it wouldn't. They'd be dead, or I would because I'm far too proud a person to even give someone the thought that they could do that to me, but that's with everyone.

On another note, sorry for making this so long, I wonder about murderers. I mean, perhaps murder is so widely accepted because murder is everywhere and for every which reason. Wars, genocide, suicides, it's everywhere. We're all used to it know and theirs almost a glory behind it. It's as if there's something almost entertaining about it. IT's a very barbaric culture we live in. People joke about murder as if it where nothing. Tis a crying shame.

6/20/2011 #22
Lady Tiki

I think the point the original poster is trying to make, is that people on this site seem to get upset if someone writes r*** into a story however if someone writes murder into a story, no one cares. By this reaction it seems to be a clear census of the public that r*** is a far greater crime then murder and that is not the case. A victim of r*** can survive r*** and go on to lead a happy and healthy life but the victim of murder has no opportunity at any sort of life, this is why judicial punishment of murder is much more severe then that of r***. What would be worst, finding out that your mother was r*** or murdered?

At the end of the day, both r*** and murder are parts of life. Watch the news if you want proof of that. It happens every single minute of every single day. R*** and murder are ADULT subject matter and there should be warning from the author that their story contains such matter (and there usually is), if you are underaged and unable to mentally and emotionally cope with such subjects, you shouldn't be reading a M rated story. I think FP should require age verification of their users and not allow minor users to read/write stories that are rated M.

11/20/2011 #23
pradlee

yeah, there's a certain glory to killing, especially when the one killing is the 'good' guy, like in movies and wars.

interestingly, i think r*** might actually be a lot more common than we think (and a lot more common than murder). i've read that, in the U.S., 1 in 6 women has been r***.

11/20/2011 #24
Mockingbirdflyaway
I think it's also because r*** is often a misunderstood topic. It SHOULD be black and white, but due to misinformation and hate, a lot of the time, it can seem very grey for someone who doesn't understand how awful it can be, and you get things like victim blaming and courts demanding to know what the victim was wearing at the time of the r***, like that would have changed anything at all. A lot of people are still stuck in the historical (and deeply flawed) mindset that it's the fault of the person who was r*** and not the r***, which is also one of the most damaging things for someone who has experienced r***, because they're already coping with the deep violation and fear that comes with the r***, and then to have some judgemental idiot claiming that it's their fault? It can completely shatter someone.
12/11/2011 #25
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