The Cheshire Cat
For characters to hang out, so to speak. Just for fun.
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Mostly a place for Cat to put her insane ramblings on why (she thinks XD) characters act in certain ways, or how they develop(ed) over time.

4/23/2014 #1
D.G. Weber
Awww, I thought you wrote one... so sad now. XD
4/23/2014 #2

I was writing one about Cor's weird inferiority complex thing...but then I fell asleep XD Unless I just turn it into a huge one in general...he likes being difficult XD

4/24/2014 #3

On the Subject of Corliss Black's Inferiority Complex

I'll call it an inferiority complex because, even though it's not that exactly, Cor has this weird idea that he is somehow inferior to most of the people walking the earth. It's not much of a self-pity thing (at least, most of the time) or even an angry angsty-thing. It's more of a quiet, slightly-weary sort of acceptance that he isn't a good person and never will be, as if it were an unchangable fact. The feeling is usually settled in the back of his subconscious, though it gets dragged out into his mind on occasion.

Part of it comes from inborn humility. While at times he'll be very proud of himself, he doesn't like compliments or being praised. It's a trait that carried over to his alternate self (the psychological "control" as it were XD). Alt-Cor is definitely a tad more arrogant, but he's still got that doesn't-like-praise thing. Rather than thinking he's a horrible person, though, alternate-Cor just doesn't see himself as extraordinarily gifted as others see him as. He still thinks he's a pretty cool guy, just not as cool as everyone else seems to think.

Corliss, on the other hand, doesn't just think he's a slightly-gifted person. He honestly and truly believes that there is something innately bad in him that he can't change, no matter how much he wishes he could. It doesn't matter how well he behaves, how bravely or how selflessly he acts, or how kindly he treats others; he will never be a good person on the inside. Never mind the fact that he's got plenty of good points. He'll only see the unpleasantness and the "evil" in himself. He tries to deny it sometimes, but that nagging little feeling still remains.

Unfortunate as it is, the main reason he's this way is most likely because of how Byre, Jedrek, Miach and co. treated him. He was constantly kicked, cursed, and taunted by most everyone around him for a good portion of his life. He was constantly told by Byre that he was a worthless, wretched excuse for a creature; that he'd caused the death of the thing the King held most dear and had no right to be alive...that the only reason he still drew breath was because of the good graces of the King. To a confused, frightened little boy, perhaps the fact that he was somehow bad was the only conclusion that made sense. The idea always sort of lurked in the back of his mind as he was growing up...but the older he got, the more pent-up anger that accumulated in him. That growing rage and hatred started making him very uneasy, and though he'd been trying to deny that anything Byre said had any merit, he couldn't help but wonder...and when he snapped and killed the old captain in a rage, it served to confirm that he was a bad person after all. This revalation that Byre had been right about him all along – in his mind – combined with the guilt of having taken a life, shook him profoundly. And, perhaps, was what led him to hate Byre all the more...enough to make him want to take revenge.

It was when he met Clare, though, that his thought process changed a bit. He still considered himself a bad person to be around in the early few days, so it came as a surprise that there was still someone out there who wanted to be around him, and someone who actually found his company enjoyable. It gave him hope—not hope that he wasn't inherently evil, unfortunately. More like hope that, even though he wasn't good on the inside, he could still live and act as if he was. And with that came a new fear—how would she react if she knew what he was really like? What he had done? He was afraid of losing this person that he cared he still kept her at arm's length, fearful he'd scare her off if she found out anything about him. That, of course, led to issues. And when he finally worked those out with her, he was surprised to learn that no, she wouldn't leave him.

Slowly, he's started thinking a bit better of himself. But the issue's still there, and it usually manifests itself in the form of blaming himself for everything that happens to the people he cares about. Clare slips and falls? His fault. She's in a bad mood? His fault for not making sure she was alright. Whenever anything even mildly terrible happens to any of the people he loves, he will always end up thinking it's his fault for one reason or another. Even so, he adores Clare more than anything. In his opinion, she more than makes up for all of his flaws, both real and imagined.

Hoo boy, that was long XD

4/27/2014 . Edited 4/27/2014 #4
D.G. Weber
Dawwwwwwwwwww! Its so sweet and cute.
4/27/2014 #5

I think Cor's definitely my favorite XD

4/27/2014 #6
D.G. Weber

...I don't even know where to start with Clare. She starts out in the original universe as a goody-goody angry do good-er thinks she's an adult, slips into her vulnerable teenaged self, and it all goes down hill from there. When she's up she's up, and when she's down... well...

And New Clare never found religion, so she is much more of a trouble maker, kept her family, so she's less vulnerable, Still a kid, and yeah....

I guess what never changes is her emotions. She very passive aggressive. All the time... I realized that the other day when she was trying to guilt trip Corliss.... She did it to Banny before too, but she was usually just aggressive and walked off, then proceeded to get into trouble... XD

4/27/2014 #7

XD I don't think either of them mind.

4/27/2014 #8
D.G. Weber

XD Well, okay then. I won't stop her. ...Not sure that I could.... But I won't try. XD

4/27/2014 #9

Then again, Banny does think she's the most perfect thing in existence...I don't think he could find fault with her if he wanted to XD

4/27/2014 #10
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