Im a 14 year old guy from Potomac, MD. Im really into military so if u got any military writing please email me about it. Originally I was gonna stop writing the first story I started but now I have gotten some good response to it so I won't. I'm also writing another story taking place in 2045(WWIII). The story i am starting will be another war story with Thomas Hamner in it.

Because the people who run fictionpress are evil they removed my dissing of the French so I'm writing it in my Bio. Enjoy.

Ch 1

This is just a short little story I wrote in my spare time dissing the French.

The story starts in 1800. Or around there.

"Hello, my name is Napolean. I am the best military commander in French history and guess what. I'm not even French, I'm Italian. And I still lost. Must be cause I commanded the French. Oh well. Next time I'll command the British."

Now we go to 1863.

"Hello, I'm the French guy with the Confederates watching them to see if we should support them." Dials phone(I know they didn't have them back then), "Hello, French King person. It is I, the French guy with the Confederates watching them to see if we should support them. After careful consideration I've decided we can not support them yet Because I still need another 10 years to inspect the U.S. for weapons of MASS destruction."

Now we go to 1940.

"Wow! WWII has only been going on for 1 year and we have already lost!!! But we are a World Power!!! Oh well. Now I guess all we can do is sit back and wait for the Allies to rescue us."

Now we go to 1966.

"Hello, I'm French president De Gual. I think that is how I spell my name. I would like to speak with President Johnson of the U.S. immediatly. What!!! This is him. Sorry, Lyndon. Didn't remember your voice because I've been drinking to much wine. What's that you say? This is not how I normally am. Or is it? It is? Oh. Must have forgotten that as well. Oh well. Now to the point of my phone call. I want all U.S. troops off French soil. I don't care that you guys saved our butts in WWII, I will have my way. What's that you say? Of course it includes all your dead GI's in out cemeteries...Or is that not possible?"

Present day.

"Hello, I'm the French president. Don't ask me my name because I forget it. Been drinking too much wine. Oh well. Bush, I want to say that this war was a horrible idea. You didn't even give us time to inspect. I don't care that we kept moving the deadline back. You should've waited. Oh well. Now that you've won, I insist that rebuilding Iraq be a United Nations matter so that all the people who helped so much in this war, including us French, can benifit from the oil in Iraq. About those GI tombs. Guess what we did to them. We painted/graffitied anti-American and anti-British slogans on them. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA."

That's it. Hope you enjoyed(unless your French in which case "GO TO..."

Ch 2

now for some French Jokes

#1
What do you call 10,000 men with their arms raised?

The French army

#2
Why do the French not want to attack Saddam Hussein?

Well, let's think. Saddam has many mistresses and is very hairy. HE IS FRENCH!!!!!

#3
The French's most difficult question of the day: Red wine or White wine?

#4
On ebay, the French were selling one of their guns. The description was: Dropped once, never used.

#5
Why are the French no longer a world power?

Their guys are named Marie and their women are hairy. I mean, we got out of the dark ages a millenium ago.

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THANKS!!!!