My name is Zoe. I am approximately female (with gender-inappropriate behavior, I'm told). I have lots of holes in my face and lots of pretty ink on my body. I like to poke holes in myself with needles, write messages in people's lawns with salt, watch horror movies, and be a general cunt to those who deserve it.

I write slash.

Yes, that's right, I write slash, aka I like to write about hot guys gettin' it on with other hot guys, aka I am a pervert and you should fear me. If you don’t like it, if you think I'm disgusting or immoral or offensive, well, you can eat my ass, because frankly, I probably hate you.

Take a fucking note of this: I do not write porn. Porn is defined as "Sexually explicit pictures, writing, or other material whose primary purpose is to cause sexual arousal," generally with little to no plot, theme, characterization, or other elements vital to storytelling.

While my writing may contain sexually explicit material, the purpose of said sexual material is to supplement or further said characters, plot, or theme. I write stories which may or may not have a sexual element to them -- which is entirely different than writing purely sexual material for the sake of, well, sexual material.

The fact that characters in my stories may or may not be gay has no bearing on the fact that they are characters, which happen to be in a story, which happens to have a plot, and the fact that this plot may involve sex between some of these gay characters does not mean that it's porn.

So don’t ask why I write gay porn.

I don’t.

I like: writing/reading/watching slash and other assorted gay things, horror movies/stories, rock and heavy metal, glam rock, tattoos, piercings, stretched piercings, feather boas, pajama pants, 70s memorabilia, odd hats, sexual innuendo/double meanings, and playing the electric bass.

I do not like: hillbillies, onions, homophobes, people who think "u" is a word, badly written slash, right-wing conservatives, creepy old men, bad spelling and grammar, shitty garage band music, and non-english-speaking people who work at fast food drive-thru windows in countries where english is the primary language.

But you know what I hate most of all, more than nearly anything else on this earth?

Stupid fucking nobs who think I want to hear how much they disapprove of my sexual orientation, the 'inappropriate' content of I write, who I may or may not choose to fuck, who I may or may not fall in love with, or any other aspect of my life that does not involve them in any way, shape, or form.

I sure do wish those people would die.

MY STORIES:

Thoughts Without Words -- work in progress. I am slow to update, but I promise, I have not abandoned it.

What Are The Odds? -- on permanent hiatus. If I do continue this story, it will have to be rewritten first, as I wrote most of it more than 8 years ago and don't much like it anymore. Bleh.

Some random quotes on writing, just because I feel like it.

"Many people hear voices when no one is there. Some of them are called mad and are shut up in rooms where they stare at the walls all day. Others are called writers and they do pretty much the same thing." Meg Chittenden

"Writing is easy. All you do is stare at a blank sheet of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead." Gene Fowler

"Why do writers write? Because it isn't there." Thomas Berger

"Write something to suit yourself and many people will like it; write something to suit everybody and scarcely anyone will care for it." Jesse Stuart

"We do not write because we want to; we write because we have to." W. Somerset Maugham

If you've read through all that, you must be almost as bored as me. Congratulations. Go read my stories.