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Joined 02-17-04, id: 398560, Profile Updated: 03-22-21
Author has written 8 stories for Romance, Supernatural, General, and Thriller.

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Instagram: thecr00kedmuse
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Twitter: TheCr00kedMuse



Still alive. Crazy, I know. I won't lie to you guys, the past year and three months have been pretty brutal. Between COVID-19, getting laid off, everything going on in the States - even though I'm in Canada, I know... aaaand then things on a personal level with my second year of school/animation going down in flames along with my mental health and having to be booked in for surgery because my body's a bastard and it hates me... Yeah, it's been rough. I'm still fighting with my mental health, still having episodes where I break down crying over essentially nothing. Not feeling suicidal anymore, thankfully, but my mood is still low enough that it's basically a miracle when I can force myself out of bed to do something productive for the day. (And when I say productive, I generally mean get dressed and take care of my dog and go to work. It ain't much I'm getting up to. A good writing day is beyond a miracle. It might as well be the biggest sign that hell is freezing over.)

The treatment that I usually fall back on when things get this bad hasn't been working, so I don't know what's next in that regard, and that's putting me under a fair bit of stress, and worsening my anxiety. Long story short, it's making writing hard. Extremely hard. I seem to be able to edit okay, but anything more than that is... asking a lot.

It could be worse, I know this. It could be much, much worse. I haven't lost anyone to COVID that I know of. I haven't had to deal with a delusional government that tries to strip away basic civil rights and incite acts of insurrection and deny that a very obviously lethal virus has been decimating my country. I haven't experienced any climate disasters that have led to people starving or freezing in their homes. I'm grateful for the fact that I've been spared that, and my heart goes out to people who haven't a million times over.

Still, everyone's pain is their own. It still hurts, and that unfortunately doesn't diminish the fact that I am hurting. I tried to kill myself via carbon monoxide poisoning in January shortly before I simply couldn't attend my virtual classes anymore due to some kind of weird PTSD-adjacent kind of feeling - just sitting at my computer would unfailingly result in a severe panic/anxiety attack and uncontrollable sobbing along with suicidal ideation - and had to submit a form for compassionate withdrawal from my program. I don't know when I'll be in any mental or emotional state to go back to continue my education.

None of this leaves much energy to write or create much of anything, but as always, I'm trying, guys. I am really, really trying.

I hope you guys are safe and healthy; I hope you're hanging in there. I hope you're more resilient than I am. And for those who are in the relatively same boat as me, don't let go. Don't give up. Keep your loved ones as close as you can. Talk to your friends and find solace in whatever healthy way that you can. Don't ever, ever turn that light out.

Take care of yourselves as well as each other out there. I hope I'll see you on the other side of this global and personal dumpster fire.

All of my love,


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Garden of the Broken (prev Unwanted Guardian: Redux) reviews
!MM! A tale of a muse without a past, of a vampire's relentless obsession, & the desperate struggle of a broken man to change. Will the strength of their bond be enough to withstand the void, or will the scars of their pasts merely hasten their destruction?
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Tragedy - Chapters: 28 - Words: 418,221 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 6/13 - Published: 4/6/2007
Bloodstar Manor: Bloodrunners
There are downsides to being the wards of Rori "The Red King" O'Connor. It started as a spontaneous road trip through the mountains. Now Jason and his dysfunctional housemates - an eccentric hacker, a synthetic half-vampire, and Rori's abrasive bastard son - must escape the perilous labyrinth of a revenge-hungry madman, or die trying.
Fiction: Thriller - Rated: M - English - Horror/Supernatural - Chapters: 6 - Words: 11,570 - Updated: 5/5 - Published: 3/8
WiP 'n' Snip Inc
A place for works in progress, and snippets of stories or ideas that were discarded, discontinued, or simply have yet to flourish. There will be the occasional meme, as well, and likely a fair share of one-shots/writing exercises, both finished and unfinished. Welcome, all, to the spectacle of my mind. Rated M just to be safe.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 17 - Words: 51,405 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 11/23/2020 - Published: 4/25/2015
Splintered Worlds
!MM! They told Yuri he was crazy, that he'd been hallucinating. Hell, he'd even convinced himself of that same fact. What he never could have known was that his decision to move to a new school on the other side of the country would change his unusual life forever, and everything he'd long since buried would come screaming to the surface. Nothing is as it seems. Now it's do or die.
Fiction: Supernatural - Rated: M - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 3 - Words: 30,295 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 12/10/2019 - Published: 1/13/2019
Some Kind of Something reviews
-MM- It all started at an anime convention when my best friend abandoned me and I barreled over a blue-eyed boy. By accident, of course. Then again, I'm accident-prone. (V. 3.0!)
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 139,055 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 3/18/2018 - Published: 11/11/2013
Ghosts of Eden reviews
!MM! Time is running out. A new heir must be brought into the world, and those who would unseat the delicate balance of life grow ever bolder in their quest to impose a deadly new world order. The future must be formed by the ghosts of the past... or else all will be destroyed by them.
Fiction: Supernatural - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 10,473 - Reviews: 2 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 7/4/2014 - Published: 2/6/2014
In Harm's Way reviews
!MM!Necrophilia! "Then who, Sphynx? Who's the poor soul whose caught your attention this time?" The Sphynx lingered at the door, silent, and then turned back with a tiny, mad grin. "Who else? The one who walks in two realities, yet exists in none, of course."
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Suspense - Chapters: 6 - Words: 115,531 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 9/16/2011 - Published: 6/22/2006
Bloodstar Manor: Unwanted Guardian reviews
DISCONTINUED. Please see Unwanted Guardian: Redux for the new and vastly improved rewrite! Thanks again everyone for a great six years! It means the world to me!
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Tragedy - Chapters: 48 - Words: 608,353 - Reviews: 615 - Favs: 199 - Follows: 71 - Updated: 7/5/2011 - Published: 9/25/2004