Zen Phoenix
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Joined 09-15-04, id: 436098, Profile Updated: 12-02-14
Author has written 441 stories for Sci-Fi, Life, Humor, Haiku, War, General, Family, Fantasy, Love, Fable, Fantasy, Essay, General, and Action.

I'm a wild artist, a martial arts junkie, and a shameless lover of kung fu movies. I collect swords, know how to use them, and loathe this mundane trap I have been placed in since birth. I write to escape, to bear the monotony, and to bring to life the world that I should have been born into. Hope you like it. I love to play Dungeons and Dragons, among other modules. O yes...I love gaming. It is good. ;)


"God is not like men, who lie; He is not a human who changes his mind. Whatever he promises, he does; He speaks and it is done." - Numbers 23:19

"So the Lord changed his mind and did not bring on his people the disaster he threatened." - Exodus 32:14


If you, my faithful reviewers, enjoy my sense of this dark tragedy we call life, you should check out my wifes poetry as well.

You can find her here. http://www.fictionpress.com/voidwhisper Go there now or your end shall be squishy and eternal.


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

On Going Mad At Night by der fiddlesticks reviews
Going a little crazier every time the sun sets
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Drama/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 132 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/24/2006
The Lady and the Dragon by The Gentle Troubadour reviews
The only thing standing between Lord Vemon and the destruction of the known universe is a group known as the Knights of the Circlet of the Dragon, led by Emperor Valankar. Action, drama, romance, torture, and love included.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 26 - Words: 78,815 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 5/5/2006 - Published: 9/10/2004
Life Inside a Clock by der fiddlesticks reviews
A look at my wonderful little life. This one's for Zen.
Poetry: Family - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 114 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/16/2005
Himmelchor by der fiddlesticks reviews
Ein ode zu den Sternen und ihrem Lied. (An ode to the stars and their song)
Poetry: Nature - Rated: K - German - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 73 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Published: 2/16/2005
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

We Are the Dawn
If a butterfly flapping it's wings causes winds in china, what happens when fat people jump?
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 161 - Published: 9/17/2013 - Complete
Until I Walk Away reviews
I'm not selfish as long as I get what I want...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 144 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Complete
The Wickerwood reviews
If your a pussy magnet and your polarity gets shifted do you draw cocks to you?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 235 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Complete
The Madness reviews
I once thought I was dead when a light came streaming out of the dark. At the last minute I realized it was car, then I really was dead on the side of highway 420 next to a mangled deer and half a raccoon.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 69 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Complete
The Falling Star reviews
While on vacation I switched trains when I wasn't supposed to and went off on a trangent...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 82 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Complete
The Dying Trill reviews
I'm getting out of this one whore town...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 110 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Complete
Plagued reviews
Sometimes I get mad when people don't face me when I speak, but when they turn around and I see the appalling ugliness of them I realize what a boon the back of the head can be...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 112 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Complete
In Came the Bastards reviews
Some people call me the fish whisperer because fish all turn to face me when I go by... But in reality it is just my kelp jacket they want.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 93 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Complete
Fistans Lament reviews
The fact that I have to work pisses me off... I should be paid to exist.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 100 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Complete
Away reviews
I wasn't sure if I had a soul so I fashioned myself one out of dollar store straws, plado, and the hides of unwanted children...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 84 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Complete
Moments reviews
The Doctor had to show me how to properly lotion my wenus...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 134 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/12/2009 - Complete
Road to Nowhere reviews
It might minutely be plausible to be one in a million. But more then likely you are like four or seven in a million...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 213 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/12/2009 - Complete
Falling Up reviews
I've always wondered if fish have dreams...If I was a fish I know I would have one great all consuming dream. Not to be a fish.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 106 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/12/2009
Pressure reviews
I don't want to go to prison. I don't think I could handle the anal skullduggery...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 69 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/12/2009 - Complete
Cantus Libertas reviews
Note to self: I hate you.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 40 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 9/12/2009 - Complete
Mashed or Not reviews
If that's not the kettle calling the choir black...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 113 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 9/12/2009 - Complete
The Moment reviews
If a tree falls in the forest do the other trees hold a service, cry, wail, and moan, then promptly forget the tree ever existed?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 117 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 9/12/2009 - Complete
Figments reviews
My fear of being eaten has gone so far as to become an edible complex.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 151 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Complete
Winter Wonders reviews
There is nothing more American then baseball, apple pie, and a chinese elvis...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 52 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Complete
Calamitious Blues reviews
A man asked me who to blame for his house being torn apart by a tornado. I looked at him in all seriousness and said, "Blame the Butterfly."
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 84 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Complete
Trickle Down reviews
I think it should be mandatory to abort all born again christians after they are born, but before they are born again.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 88 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Complete
Innocent reviews
For the latest in downloadable Zen click here @. Now temporarily available in Sober...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 64 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Complete
Dewdrop Valley reviews
Sometimes I take a deep breath and look at the world around me and think, "Damn it smells here..."
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 206 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Complete
Winters Mourning reviews
Water is the only mother I will ever claim.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 42 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Complete
Turning Old reviews
Half the people alive today are riding the short train to stupid town...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 57 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Complete
To Feast on the Sun reviews
I'm an inter-faith athiest, I deny the gods of all faiths equally...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 96 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Complete
The Sea of Doubt reviews
There should be a program for those addicted to religion. They could call it J.A. for Jesus Anonymous.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 130 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Complete
The Scarlet Solarium reviews
When I grow up I want to be a casual potentate.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 327 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Complete
The Fall of Shadows reviews
There are to many ugly people for there really to be a good god...unless he has my sense of humor.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 71 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Complete
Spectral Bliss reviews
Yes I hear voices in my head...but they are never talking to me.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 198 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Complete
Dragon Slayer reviews
If I built a little town out of popsicle sticks and marshmellows and invited dwarves to live there could I call myself Lord of the Wee?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 244 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Complete
Dead Until I Die reviews
Everyone gets all worked up when you mock what's his nuts and his cross.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 66 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Complete
Cryogenic Dream reviews
I'm that one dude and don't you forget it!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 112 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Complete
Miracle reviews
I miss me already and I'm not even dead...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 67 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Complete
For Love of Her reviews
In the battle between the heart and the mind the only true winner in the end is the skeleton...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 152 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Complete
Crippled reviews
I've decided to stop putting things off till tomorrow...tomorrow.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 326 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Complete
Dance Today reviews
I never go to water parks in the Midwest anymore. Why do I need to see a family of 300 pound hambeasts forming cholesterol molecules using their bodies and yellow inner-tubes loosely connected by ionic fat hand holding?"
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 168 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Complete
Till I am Shadow Too reviews
If anyone were to ask me to have sex I would have to answer with a nymphatic yes!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 130 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Complete
Passed Beyond reviews
I would have so many bands if I made a band everytime I heard a great name for a band. Like the Winking Sphincters.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 125 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Complete
Desolate reviews
I try not to wake up too happy in the morning. You never know where the day will lead and the last thing I want is to be guilty of premature joculation."
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 119 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Complete
Woke Up Dead reviews
I woke up dead half an hour before I went to bed...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 101 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Complete
The White Roof Conspiracy reviews
At some point this fiction must become reality or there will be no reality for us anymore. Is it already to late?
Fiction: General - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,234 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 6/22/2008 - Complete
The Breaking Point reviews
A being pushed to far, will sometimes break in violent ways.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 451 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 6/22/2008 - Complete
Bloody Sun reviews
The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 41 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 6/22/2008 - Complete
The Eyes of Eternity reviews
The problem with self discipline is it's so hard to force yourself to have it.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 100 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 6/22/2008 - Complete
Chaz Nasty reviews
I tried to sit through the meeting for premature ejaculators, but I left early.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 31 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 6/22/2008 - Complete
Paradox reviews
I hate that the sales clerk at the book store won't show me where the self-help section is. She said it would defeat the purpose
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 78 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 6/22/2008 - Complete
The Dance reviews
The suburbs are what is left when the developers rip out all the trees, then name the streets after them
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 90 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 6/22/2008 - Complete
The Majestic Roach reviews
The perfect formula for success: Rise early, work late, strike oil.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 71 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 6/22/2008 - Complete
The Basil Truth reviews
Existence: it's better than nothing
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 84 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 6/22/2008 - Complete
The Long Road Home reviews
I told her I was trying, but you can't milk a dead horse...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 129 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 4/30/2008 - Complete
The Torture reviews
I find it very funny that "God" saves only those that know how to swim from drowning...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 57 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 4/30/2008 - Complete
The Machine reviews
Life just pinched me in the sphincter yet again...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 261 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 4/30/2008 - Complete
The Agonist reviews
Wal-Mart, where white trash goes to die...or maybe that was shop?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 223 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Complete
Black Sheep reviews
The reason you don't have to take an aptitude test to have children is because our glorious leaders would never pass it...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 98 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Complete
The Sound of Self reviews
Don't mind me, my brains on a permanent walk-about...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 301 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Complete
Fickle reviews
God didn't make stupid people silly, that was just Satan peeing in the mixing bowl...apparently.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 125 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Complete
Drifting Shadows reviews
Your mom looks like she was slapped together with paste and safety scissors at summer camp. Then some kid took her home and gave her to his parents and they had to pretend to like her, but she just got thrown in a drawer next to the buckskin wallet.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 271 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Complete
All the Fading Flowers reviews
Jesus came to forgive us of our transgressions. In his infinite mercy he sacrificed himself to Lord Voldemort and the fearsome Nazgul. Ever since that fateful day, he has lain in cryogenic slumber within an adamantine cage, waiting for the glorious Raptur
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 48 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Complete
Morose reviews
Support evolution, Have your local idiot spayed or neutered.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 81 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Complete
The Glorious Death of Captain Quinn reviews
Sometimes the reasons for valor are more complicated then a storyteller would have you believe.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 888 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 1/22/2008 - Complete
Wayward reviews
Faith is not a good enough shield against the recurve claws and forward facing eyes of life.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 192 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 1/22/2008 - Complete
The Winters Queen reviews
My soul would make a great paper weight. Then it would have a purpose.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 115 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/22/2008 - Complete
Wisps of Tomorrow reviews
I'm a realist, instead of cleaning I made my house out of dirt.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 32 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/22/2008
Homecoming reviews
Atheism the universal doctrine of NuUh.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 69 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 1/22/2008 - Complete
Prison reviews
The agony of my psychosis is softened by my narcissism...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 28 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/22/2008 - Complete
I Stood Alone reviews
Bathing in someone's blood is not all it's cracked up to be.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 182 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 11/12/2007 - Complete
Something's Wrong reviews
We're sorry, this brain has been disconnected, or is no longer in service.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 106 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/12/2007 - Complete
Dreamlimit reviews
Bobs restaurant really took off when he replaced the words 'tortured baby cow' with 'veal' on his menu...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 176 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/14/2007 - Complete
Earth reviews
I have decided that you plebians must now refer to me by the Unholy Tetragrammaton of my true name 'JSTN'.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 167 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 9/14/2007 - Complete
Koi Arena reviews
I sacrificed my Tickle me Elmo to Hades...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 212 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/5/2007 - Complete
The Mulberry King reviews
I hate gravity for having such a death grip on my privates...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 236 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 9/5/2007 - Complete
Twizzler reviews
I always wanted to wander the western plain, unfortunatly I have a deathly fear of crashing...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 101 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/5/2007 - Complete
Opiated reviews
Socalled 'metrosexuals' don't enrage me or threaten my sexuality, they only inspire a kind of deep pity. You don't fluff up your plumage to such a ridiculous degree unless you're incredibly desperate to ward off really big predators.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 339 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/5/2007 - Complete
Soulfree reviews
When I eventually succumb to the withering effects of time and irony, I hope to have a hundred crying fans at my funeral pretending they knew me really well and using their grief to get laid.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 65 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/5/2007 - Complete
Lost Zion reviews
Defication is such a filthy term, I prefer making an anal rendering.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 126 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/5/2007 - Complete
Nevernow reviews
The reality is bees...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 184 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/5/2007 - Complete
Faces and Shadows reviews
I had the intent to be a nice person today. You should be happy with that, it is probably all your going to get.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 76 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/5/2007 - Complete
Black Horizons reviews
I can lift a fully grown horse above my head, and I can hold my breath for ten minutes. To settle a wager,I once ate a pound of WalMart's strongest badger poison and then ran a mile in the nude. Lawmen fear me.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 332 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Intwined reviews
Your Mom looks like a big flabby pile of bacon wrapped in flesh colored spandex.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 177 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Fiction With Diction reviews
I hereby confirm in writing that I buy children from their parents and use them to test my booby traps.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 181 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Soul Apart reviews
I am afraid that I will die without ever realizing my dream of trepanning a mermaid.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 252 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
A Chance to Play reviews
And God said, Let there be eukaryotes to populate the Deep, and let them congregate and multiply in such a way as to form symbiotic relationships. And God called the symbiotic pairs multicellular organisms.The lost and controversial Book of Evolution
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 336 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
The Calling reviews
FIDELITY, n. A virtue peculiar to those who areabout to be betrayed.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 168 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Escape reviews
Fat bikers shouldn't wear leather jackets. I'm pretty sure it's like Biblically forbidden to wrap a pig in cowskin.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 155 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
After the End reviews
My fat sweaty neighbors are contemptible scum worthy of nothing more than a short life of physically demanding unskilled labor that culminates in a fatal accident and their bodies being ground up and sold as dog food in China to feed unloved poor people.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 101 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Doomed reviews
Getting a bad review from an idiot is kind of like having your hygiene criticized by Pig Pen as he lays dying from Hepatitis C.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 180 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Luminous Equation reviews
I do not refrain from eating Jello because I do not like it. I don't eat it because I still believe in the existence of Teddy the Jello Troll.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 126 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Land of Sin reviews
Don't take it the wrong way, when I say that I hate you, that mearly is an analogy for the vitriolic contempt I feel for your soul...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 456 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Fools in the Garden of ID reviews
Nothing will ever make me want to bust a move...ever!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 27 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Shadow Chasers reviews
I wear my hair like a tempest of hatred that surrounds me every waking moment of my tormented existence.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 151 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Interrogation reviews
Sometimes chance just gotta screw ya.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 93 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Vitriolic Love reviews
In all actuallity, when it comes right down to it, we are not...NOT, I reiterate. beautiful on the inside. We are more a squishy mass of goopy yellow, red, and pink, meat and pus.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 203 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Memoirs of a Tortured Soul reviews
Dear Jesus Please make everyone die. Amen.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 856 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
The Drunken Dance reviews
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Beat him with a fish and he'll never be hungry for fish again...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 123 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
Turbulence reviews
Who are you people and why am I naked?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 246 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
The Sea of Me reviews
A fat man who loves himself is like god giving you lemons and you make lemonade, except it's really god throwing funnel cakes at you, and you eat them.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 150 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
Tarnished reviews
I cherish those moments when it feels like god is peering directly at me, but deep down inside I know that all he is saying is, Nope, still retarded...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 99 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
The Dancing Phoenix reviews
I created something for all you gamers out there that feel you need to lose a few pounds, it is called the 5 Bastard Spoon of Fasting.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 329 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
Afraid reviews
Life is like a box of chocolates, except they're all turds...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 167 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
The Madness of Man reviews
I always wonder if when I am thinking, people around me can hear Flight of the Bumblebee playing.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 128 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
The Kingdom Beyond reviews
I was crestfallen when I learned that you couldn't go to college to become a Samurai.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 571 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
Lost Dreams reviews
Sometimes I hate going to the store and buying both rat chow and cat food...Logic would dictate that I eliminate a step here.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 396 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
Tides of Thought reviews
Do you realize we are living in the largest insane asylum of all time. Ahh, but asylums have fences you say. We do, it's called the atmosphere...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 145 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/11/2007 - Complete
The Greatness of Why reviews
What the world needs now isn't love sweet love, what it needs is another good plague.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 118 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 4/2/2007 - Complete
Museum of Self reviews
You know that thing that has been bothering you for days...I did that.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 191 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 4/2/2007 - Complete
Awakening Dragon reviews
When the earth finally gets around to expelling this virus called man I hope I am the last one alive so I can yell, HA HA, SERVES YOU RIGHT, STUPID HUMANS!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 175 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/13/2007 - Complete
Divine Integration reviews
Life would be so much better without...well without you in it.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 110 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/13/2007 - Complete
Fallen reviews
Do the people in my dreams dream of me when they go to sleep?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 165 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/5/2007 - Complete
Looming Epiphany reviews
I've often thought that a mollusk could beat a mountain lion, if given enough time to strategize.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 66 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 3/5/2007 - Complete
Casting Ophelia reviews
This society is what happens when you tell idiots there opinion matters...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 128 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 2/27/2007 - Complete
Transcendalia reviews
The soldiers of the Burger King will never topple the McTatorship.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 140 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 2/27/2007 - Complete
The Shadows of September reviews
Where do babies come from? Asked little Timmy. Martha froze. It would break his little heart if he knew about the experiment...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 320 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 12/28/2006 - Complete
Goodbye Tomorrow reviews
Somebody remind me to bury the hookers before they start to smell...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 121 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 12/28/2006 - Complete
Translucent Tears reviews
I tried to get a lesbian who hates men to love me by telling her my man meat is like a daddy longlegs spider, it may be poisonous but its mouth is so small it can't bite you....
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 174 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 12/28/2006 - Complete
Wasted reviews
Some people say it's not the size of the pencil that matters. But only people with small pencils think that.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 100 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 12/28/2006 - Complete
Cluttered reviews
Humanity makes me want to hurt myself...well more humanity then myself...actually all humanity and zero me...man just screw you guys.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 150 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/28/2006 - Complete
Wind Country reviews
All I got in my stocking for Christmas is a box of Pop Rocks and a can of coke...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 87 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/28/2006 - Complete
The Beginings of Truth reviews
The world was not made for us, we were made from the world. And it's time we started acting like a part of it, not a consumer of it.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,495 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/28/2006 - Complete
Genuinflection reviews
Guns don't kill people, bullets do you retard.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 110 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/28/2006 - Complete
Hidden reviews
I hate being so combustible, but usually only when I am on fire...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 254 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/28/2006 - Complete
Wake the F&CK up reviews
My Homunculi staged a walk out... I feel so alone.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 225 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Complete
Time of War reviews
Congratulate me! I have finally made it to Santa's Total Bastard list.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 61 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Complete
Without You reviews
Yes I hear voices in my head, but don't worry, they only speak Tlingit.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 188 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Complete
Purple Toenails reviews
Nothing puts a bunch in my thong like people implying I'm not manly...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 114 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Complete
Who reviews
Jesus isn't so great, my level four mage can do all those miracles.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 54 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Complete
The Sunshine Girl reviews
I'm what lives in your closet.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 37 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Complete
Recipe 42 reviews
If you squint and look at me sideways I almost appear human...almost.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 59 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Complete
Longing for You reviews
Get your head out of the toilet bowl... we don't taste waste.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 84 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Complete
Dead in the Water reviews
My brain is a strange journey on a road made of peanut butter in a landscape of ramen noodles and cigarettes.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 38 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Complete
Demented Diligence reviews
I think back to the days when I breathed water and think...god I love gummy worms.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 170 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 9/21/2006
Born to Lose reviews
Feeling overcrowded? Support the gay agenda...more ladies for me anyways ;).
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 163 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 9/21/2006
The Whisper of the Wheel reviews
If I were an amputee I would go to the beach and bury myself in sand. Then ask small children to help me get out and then when they start digging with their little plastic shovels I would lift my stump out of the sand and scream "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE"
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 181 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/14/2006
Tilted Horizon reviews
I try to listen to nature but all it says is, "Go, go, have your little thoughts."
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 75 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/14/2006
Heckling the Sunrise reviews
Must you rip me in twain and dance in my guts with such enthusiasm?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 384 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 9/2/2006
Simon Finch and the Specter of Oakham Woods reviews
The heroic accountant Simon Finch misses his bus one dark night, forcing him to walk home through a gloomy wood full of shadows, moonlight, and...a ghost?
Fiction: General - Rated: K - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,699 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 8/31/2006
Seasons of the Soul reviews
There are only two infinite things, really. The universe and human stupidity. And physicists are unsure about the former
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 131 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/31/2006
Keep it in Your Pants reviews
God created the dinosaurs to punish the gays. It's in Leviticus. "He who shall know another man so shall know the cruel talons of the raptor. Thus spake Jesus and then Jesus cast polymorph self and transformed into a bugbear. The sodomites scattered.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 368 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/31/2006
The Metal Night reviews
You never realize how often ants burst spontaneously into flames until you really watch them with a magnifying glass on a hot summers day.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 67 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/23/2006
Tribal reviews
I think about drowning my troubles a lot...but I can never get her to go swimming with me.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 214 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/23/2006
The Cleansing reviews
When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue. In a bad mood, it left a big red mark on my forehead.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 158 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/23/2006
Sacred Rhythm reviews
A funny thing I like to do at the chiropractors is, when he's working on me, I go limp and soil myself so he thinks I'm dead.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 164 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/23/2006
Dinner Conversation reviews
"I have decided, in the interests of population balance, to fill the void left by the cave bears and start eating you all."
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 325 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/14/2006
The Further Adventures of Simon Finch reviews
"Simon Finch, everyone's favorite accountant, encounters an innocent in distress and must save the day yet again"
Fiction: General - Rated: K - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,571 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/14/2006
Sundered Heart reviews
That which does not kill you is only softening you up for later.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 352 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 8/14/2006
Summer Shadows reviews
The fact that I can't taste my own tongue is driving me mad...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 122 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 8/11/2006
Ren Diddle Diddle reviews
Did you know that you can turn in the skin of an unbaptized baby at Spencer's Gifts for store credit?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 123 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/11/2006
I Hate You reviews
If you want to get a feel for my utter boredom and disgust for humanity then just press the same key on a piano for 180 minutes while looking at a picture of a ball sack.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 491 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/11/2006
For The Gentle Troubador reviews
This Halloween I am going to wrap my man giblets in police tape and go as a crime scene.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 133 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/11/2006
Break Out reviews
I wish it was legal to surf cars on the highway.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 149 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/11/2006
Dalliance with Darkness reviews
I wish I had invisible hands so I could scratch myself in public...without people looking at me funny.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 178 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/11/2006
Only One Shoe reviews
Suicide hotline. Please hold.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 97 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/11/2006
For Eaten by Housecats reviews
It is my gathering and I will weep if I am thus inclined to do so.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 122 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/11/2006
What Funny Little Fish reviews
I was wondering. How do you get your head so far up there? And how do you breath?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 211 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 8/11/2006
The Great Unknown reviews
Do you think I like pointing out the obviouse? Well, it is kind of fun laughing at you...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 172 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/11/2006
The Crystal Shade reviews
I don't mind most hand-me-downs except for two. One is underwear, which I refuse to wear. And the other is the earth, which I have no choice about taking.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 93 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 8/11/2006
Meating Place reviews
I'm God and so are my cat's...well, that one anyways.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 81 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/11/2006
Centrifuge reviews
I took a nap on top of the shelf today, just to see why the cats like it so much...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 141 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 8/11/2006
Cerridwen My Lover reviews
Sometimes you look at a guy and wonder whether his tan is real or spray-on. At least if he's Dracula we know for sure.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 94 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/11/2006
Dandelion Daydreams reviews
Everyone keeps telling me that madness will take its toll. Good thing I have exact change.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 90 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/11/2006
Forever Today reviews
It's good to be the Zen...sometimes, Fricking Leeds!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 171 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 8/3/2006
The Rhyming Sublime reviews
I'm only human so screw off with your 'stay dark or the parents get it'. They already got it, I destroyed their will to live long ago and all that is left is to give them sweet release, so be my guest!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 112 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 8/3/2006
Life reviews
We're all pink on the inside, baby. Except me. I'm full of circuit boards and moths.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 541 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 8/3/2006
For Doozerballz reviews
Yesterday I ran over a rainbow and fashioned a festive cape from the corpse.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 181 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/3/2006
Nothing to Say reviews
I am not aging. I am simply leveling up.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 66 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/3/2006
The Reality of Faith reviews
I haven't lost it, I never had it to begin with...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 602 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/3/2006
Nothing More reviews
All hail 667, the neighbor of the beast!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 210 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 7/21/2006
The Spaces Between reviews
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 188 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 7/21/2006
Dream reviews
My indian ancestors came when I called but all they did was rifle through my stuff...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 23 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 7/21/2006
Asylum reviews
This is the most delicious mortal sin since I violated my neighbor with a Charleston Chew.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 63 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 7/21/2006
Mental Thunder reviews
My entire image is carefully crafted to lure in the unwary.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 131 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 7/21/2006
Why Do I Care reviews
My date didn't believe me when I told her she was beautiful. No no, I said, lies are good for your complexion...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 294 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 7/21/2006
Counterfeit reviews
My danger stick is facing forward and has one eye. Does that mean I'm a sexual predator?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 176 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 7/21/2006
A Whisper of Wind reviews
Power doesn't come from faith or hard work or integrity. Power comes from being able to bite the skull off a bison.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 131 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 7/12/2006
Into the Unknown reviews
I wander barefoot through the cosmic ether of thought and think to myself...didn't I have shoes on?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 187 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/12/2006
Fading reviews
You won't laugh at my kickass sword collection when a violent peasant uprising threatens the social order!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 156 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/12/2006
Diluted reviews
I'm finished with these weak little gnomes! I'm getting a lawn golem!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 174 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/12/2006
Incomplete reviews
Life is a bucket of crap...but at least it's my bucket.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 83 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 7/4/2006
Graveyard Jitters reviews
Listening to you is like listening to a record backwards and I have only one response...huh?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 138 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 7/4/2006
A Memory in the Sand reviews
Don't waste time worrying for fools. No matter how many pounds of common sense you try to give them, they are still just dumb.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 133 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 6/30/2006
Need reviews
You know what really keeps god out of your house? THE FACT THAT HE IS A FRICKING FIGMENT...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 184 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 6/30/2006
Summer 2006 reviews
People keep telling me to find Jesus. Not to worry, I tell them, I have his location pretty well nailed down...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 146 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 6/22/2006
The Boneyard reviews
I like to paint my name on things in blood...well not my blood.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 77 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 6/20/2006
All of Me for a Wandering Rose reviews
If you want a true feeling of liberation why not embrace apathy...then again I don't care what you do.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 171 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 6/20/2006
Today Was Supposed to be Tomorrow reviews
You do realize that we have long digestive tracts...which mean we are not true carnivores but herbivores. Ever wonder why most of you act like prey.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 160 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/20/2006
Song of the Astronomer reviews
I've invested so much time in trying to convince the female population that "Zen Phoenix" is the fifth food group...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 138 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 6/20/2006
Forget reviews
The neighbors were a little offended when they saw me pissing in the corner of my yard but, as I told them, "how else am I to keep God off my lawn"
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 160 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 6/20/2006
The Big Joke reviews
The end is horrible and squishy.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 167 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 6/20/2006
Testicular Fortitude reviews
Dressing up in victorian underwear and dancing in a graveyard does not a goth make.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 263 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 6/5/2006
The Last Ride reviews
For Cerus vengeance is all the King has left him.
Fiction: Action - Rated: M - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,216 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 6/5/2006
The Hunger reviews
Yes, infact, you can live your life hypocriticly... if that's all you aspire to.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 84 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 6/5/2006
Negative Space reviews
Last night as I lay on my back in bed looking up at the stars I wondered, where the hell is my ceiling?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 160 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 5/25/2006
Please reviews
Do not eat the dingleberry smoothie! Dingleberries are not in fact berries at all. Now I know...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 163 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/25/2006
Solitude reviews
Mein Schwartz est un flamen-fuhrmen.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 61 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/25/2006
Majesty reviews
I wiggled and wobbled then I did fall down... a couple times. And I landed on my head, which bleed a lot. But I got ice cream so I'm alright.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 100 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/17/2006
We Just Are reviews
Who the hell are you people and where are my pants?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 123 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/16/2006
Hell reviews
Do not mistake my Misanthropic words for true hatred... it's just general dislike.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 84 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 5/16/2006
So Say the Children reviews
A man faces the end of all he knows.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 487 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/16/2006
This Metal Man reviews
Someone told me to try Jesus and I told them that I would... but the edible parts had decayed long, long ago.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 76 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/16/2006
Somewhere Close to Nowhere reviews
I'm waving at you from the highest window of the Ivory Tower. Or through the bars on the window of the dungeon if I've somehow found my way into Solomon's.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 111 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/16/2006
Fire reviews
You all just hate Americans because we have all the pie.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 101 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/16/2006
The Torment reviews
You must push yourself my child, for no one else knows where you keep the strawberries.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 89 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 4/25/2006
No More reviews
I rolled a D-20 to see if I could get out of bed today but failed both my constitution and my strength. But apparently I look good not doing anything, so my charisma roll says.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 68 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 4/25/2006
Down in the Deep reviews
What? Did you say something? I'm sorry I was ignoring the fact that anyone else existed...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 65 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 4/25/2006
The Warlords Peace reviews
Resigned to his fate a Warlord ponders his loneliness, that is until something unexpected happens.
Fiction: General - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,290 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 4/12/2006
Lonely Feet reviews
All things in moderation my child, all things but sex, it's all about sex.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 126 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 4/12/2006
Design reviews
Enjoy the desolation that is truth, or perhaps a gobstopper, which is desolate too.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 66 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 4/12/2006
Pride of the Forsaken reviews
Who is the stranger who appears at the gates of Durgans village and pays his way in heads? In his quest for the truth, Durgan will be drawn all the way to hell and back.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 15,111 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 3/25/2006 - Published: 1/2/2006
Torn Asunder reviews
I've always wondered how hotdogs can survive in the wild without eyes.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 76 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/8/2006
Piss Off reviews
Note to self: The big blue thing at the bottom of the urinal is not actually a gigantic blue raspberry Mento...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 68 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/8/2006
For Sisyphus reviews
I just found out the sea cucumber eats and defecates from the same orifice. At first I was disgusted, but then I thought "Now THAT's efficiency."
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 140 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 3/8/2006
Faded Dreams reviews
My degus Count Fugly and One Eyed Tilla could kick Raunchy Pete's ass any day...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 30 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 3/8/2006
For Satan's Mittens reviews
I'm so lonely tonight. The cats popped my date...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 105 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 3/8/2006
At The End reviews
I'm nothing more then a whimper in time...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 100 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/8/2006
Satyr reviews
I've been smacked up beside the head with the epiphany two-by-four.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 141 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 1/24/2006
The Perfect Lonely Day reviews
All the jive is mine!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 123 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 1/24/2006
Dreaming reviews
I'm so glad I'm finally losing weight! Could be the exercise and the good diet, or the evening walks with the neighbors. Or possibly the heroin.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 122 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 1/20/2006
Save the Suffering reviews
No one at my high school reunion was impressed with me. All of them are doctors or lawyers or CEOs, but I KNOW I was the only Level 23 Dungeon Master!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 114 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/14/2006
Rage reviews
Shut your mouth or I'll slap you with the wet end of my sock!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 85 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 1/14/2006
Cast In Stone reviews
I've started wearing a cross made of ham because my ex-girlfriend is a Muslim and I'm afraid she might infect me with her bite.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 99 - Reviews: 10 - Published: 1/2/2006
Hibernate reviews
The Troubadour never appreciated the statues that I would lovingly sculpt for her every day, and place gently on her pillow at night so they would be the first things she sees. She just yelled at me to stay out of the litter box.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 137 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 12/29/2005
The Lunchtime Adventure reviews
Simon Finch is not like other acountants. This is the tale of one of his greatest lunchtime forays into the hinterlands.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,467 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 12/29/2005
The Starchildren reviews
Cross me and I'll have the Troubadour kick you with the pointy shoes. Then set my pack of rabid reviewers on you.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 264 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/29/2005
The Fear reviews
I only lie when neccesity dictates that I do so... but I do so well.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 127 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 12/29/2005
Summer Of The Soul reviews
I know my cats hate me, they keep peeing in my shoes.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 95 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/14/2005
Shall I Die Today reviews
I am the merkin raider.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 134 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 12/14/2005
Thoughts reviews
Well I thought you might like to see what it's like in here, so whenever I have a thought I feel like writting down, other then a story or poem, I will make another entry, enjoy...
Fiction: Essay - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,194 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 10/9/2005 - Published: 4/16/2005
Fever Dream reviews
I am the gray area...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 98 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 10/9/2005
Eyes In The Darkness reviews
I'm glad I can't fly, it hurts enough falling from this height.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 118 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 10/9/2005
Winter Comes reviews
These mud pies taste like crap!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 50 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 10/9/2005
The Hidden River reviews
I wear the fabric of time...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 100 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 10/9/2005
Nihilistic Tendency reviews
God, if god there is, is a solipsist.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 72 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 10/9/2005
Sweet Whisper reviews
I have drank the drink of the drunken drunkard.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 27 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 10/9/2005
The Caves Of Forever reviews
There is nothing funnier then watching a dumbass be himself.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 59 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/13/2005
Visions Of Nothing reviews
Sorry, I failed 'How To Be Normal' in High School...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 54 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 9/13/2005
Who Are You? reviews
It hurt's right here. Not so much here or here, but just right here.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 118 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/13/2005
Despair reviews
I surf the tides of despair.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 102 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 9/13/2005
Peace Comes In Moments reviews
My pee glows in the dark, but only when I drink glow sticks...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 80 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/13/2005
Ending reviews
Just for the record, I don't care.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 81 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/13/2005
To Kill A Man reviews
A young man discovers for the first time what it is truly like to kill a man.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 635 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 9/1/2005
Into The Darkness reviews
Life is like the popsicles the strange man on the corner used to give me as a child; It tastes really good in the begining, but by the end you realize it's just a penis dipped in Tang...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 55 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 9/1/2005
War Machine reviews
I've decided to become an active participant in natural selection.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 97 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 9/1/2005
The Humdrum reviews
I can understand that life knocks you down sometimes, but does it have to stomp on your nuts while your there...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 58 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 9/1/2005
The Music Of The Damned reviews
Blame the gnome.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 71 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 9/1/2005
Please Notice Me reviews
Another word for 'fleet', is 'coward'.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 34 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 9/1/2005
The Earth Will Remember reviews
For Hung Like A Squid, you rock man.And remember that all roads should be traveled.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 74 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 6/20/2005
The Whispering Winds Of Edelford reviews
WooHoo natural 20, wait where am I?
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 103 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 6/9/2005
A Midnight Rose reviews
When I die I would like the words, "Hotel Maggot" carved into my skull.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 80 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 6/9/2005
Today I Will Whisper reviews
Just so you know, "The 8-ball told me to", does not stand up in court...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 73 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 6/9/2005
Thinking Of Death reviews
Nothing says I hate you like a brick to the head.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 55 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 6/9/2005
On Dark Rainy Nights reviews
I'm mentally eclectic.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 32 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 6/9/2005
Forgotten reviews
I hate when people don't stand for the national anthem. So when I was at the basketball game and the guy next to me didn't stand up, I grabbed the unpatriotic bastard and threw him down the stairs. Then after that, I took his wheelchair and threw that too
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 48 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 5/19/2005
Feel The Sorrow reviews
Sometimes you eat the bear, and sometimes the bear eats you, or violently sodomizes you.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 37 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 5/19/2005
Degu Dreams reviews
The Lord works in mysterious ways in order to screw you out of what you deserve.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 68 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 5/19/2005
Empty Days reviews
Fool me once, shame on you,Fool me twice, shame on me,Fool me three times, shame on your mother, who is a whore
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 25 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 5/19/2005
Where Has He Been reviews
If I was your God I wouldn't show my face either.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 52 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5/19/2005
Blame It On The Bong reviews
Corruptions are clogging all the holes in my head.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 79 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 4/18/2005
The Shadowed Dawn reviews
I want to make a human sized bug zapper, so I can fling random people into it when i get bored...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 24 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 4/18/2005
For Tickle Me Preacher reviews
Puns are just nasty, besides being the root of all things unsound.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 38 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 4/16/2005
Enough Said reviews
I like the unfortunate, they make me feel good about myself...
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 38 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 4/16/2005
For Hung Like A Squid reviews
Acid makes the world go round, round...and round again.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 63 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 4/16/2005
Cold reviews
You just missed me...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 34 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 4/16/2005
Last Man Standing reviews
I'd like to thank nature, and society, for making me the cold, unfeeling, bastard I am today.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 142 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/16/2005
Masterful Con reviews
I wish I could take a year of life from everyone and add it to mine... I don't want to live forever, just longer then I’m gonna!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 50 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 4/16/2005
ADD reviews
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! OK, I'm better now.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 68 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 4/16/2005
The Walking Dead reviews
Don't eat the cookies! They are tainted with EVIL!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 76 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 4/16/2005
Art reviews
I wish I could dip my brain in chocolate...among other things.
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 52 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 4/16/2005
The Storm reviews
Save me all the squishy bits.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 51 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 4/2/2005
Sinner reviews
If I eat meat, and am made of meat. Does that mean that plant's are made of sunshine?
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 25 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 4/1/2005
Dark Day reviews
I'm so poor I don't even get a damn hand basket, I'm going to hell in brown paper sack!
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 94 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 4/1/2005
Mirage reviews
I eat sand!
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 70 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 3/21/2005
Crimson Tears reviews
Long live the forgotten.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 69 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 3/20/2005
The Sunny Day Rule reviews
.I require the meat of a thousand babies, stir fried with almonds and butter, served in a thousand very small bowls... and perhaps a mint sauce
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 64 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 3/20/2005
Peace With The Dawn reviews
I am ambidextrously parasitic.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 41 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 3/20/2005
The Rascal reviews
Theres always truth in fiction, but truth is sometimes wrong.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 70 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 3/20/2005
Solitary Man reviews
We can't all be right, can we?
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 99 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 3/20/2005
Hegemony reviews
Nothing is unnatural to the universe.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 148 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3/20/2005
A Bit Of Space reviews
No Timmy, Gods don't grow on trees.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 101 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 3/20/2005
Oblivious Too reviews
Shhh, its really two candles I'm holding together, not one candle burning at both ends.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 54 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/9/2005
Weirdo reviews
Keep talking, I'm sharpening my sword.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 96 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/9/2005
Unfinished Dreamer reviews
It's hard enough without thou bitching in mine ear.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 82 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/9/2005
Fractured Security reviews
It sucks to be a tall man in a short house.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 68 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/9/2005
Signs Of The Sun reviews
If Jesus could really do what they say he could, then he would be a "Mutant", and not the "Son of God", as previously assumed.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 127 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 3/2/2005
Just Burn reviews
I asked to be taken seriously, but nobody was listening.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 62 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/2/2005
The Shameless reviews
I tripped and fell off the beaten path into the quagmire of disillusionment.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 165 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 3/2/2005
Happy Grass Stained Feet reviews
Nature must have been thinking of me when it created breasts...I wish I had a pair
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 95 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 3/2/2005
Silent Companion reviews
Why am I so sweet? I was fed sunshine and sugar till the age of fifteen.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 168 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 2/19/2005
Tell No One Why reviews
I would eat my left nut if Drew Barrymoore asked me to.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 35 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 2/19/2005
Da Vinci Is Dust reviews
If all the beings of the planet got together in a big group and ran in the same direction, I wonder if the earth would spin faster. That or stop...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 52 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 2/19/2005
For Wrath Of Cthulu reviews
It's like when your writing your name in the snow and you pee on your shoe's and you think, ' I should go inside before my toes freeze, but come on man, who really likes peaches anyways?
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 58 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 2/19/2005
Fairies Revenge reviews
How much must you offend yourself before you can't even masterbate?
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 177 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 2/19/2005
Ashen Goals reviews
I wish we used marshmallows for pillows, then it would be ok when I ate it...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 73 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 2/19/2005
For Solidarity reviews
Skinny people have no souls...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 63 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 2/19/2005
Sing reviews
Your entitled to your opinion, but please have it silently in the corner from now.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 61 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 2/19/2005
Passionate Moments reviews
Wake me up before the end.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 35 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 2/19/2005
Pound By Pound reviews
I hate the sound of a fat man crying...you fat, fat, crying man!
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 53 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 2/9/2005
Silent Multiverse reviews
'The fairies did it' is no longer a viable excuse.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 45 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 2/9/2005
Concrete Icons reviews
My mind is always twelve steps ahead of my feet.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 41 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 2/9/2005
A Pound of Pebbles reviews
Do you want to touch my pebbles?
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 51 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 2/5/2005
So Long Mary reviews
Americans gibber on in their odd little quasi-language like they know what they are saying...silly Americans.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 110 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 2/5/2005
Valankar Can reviews
I fell through a crack in the Earth and wound up on the dark side of the moon, it's cold here and there's no microwave...
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 177 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 2/5/2005
Grandpa and Georg reviews
I wish the world changed colors like a gobstopper as we sucked away at it.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 144 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 2/5/2005
This Torpid Dream reviews
I play hide and seek with shadows.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 80 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 2/5/2005
Bedtime Prayer reviews
I hate peas, and anyone who likes them, and anything even remotely hinting at the flavor of a pea. Damn all you pea lovers to the nine hells.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 30 - Reviews: 9 - Published: 1/27/2005
I Too reviews
JellyBellies are uncannily similar to their individual namesakes.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 155 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 1/24/2005
Peabody Smalls reviews
If my characters came to life they would beat my ass for going to such imaginitive extremes.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 62 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 1/24/2005
Ode To Me reviews
Yes , I actually talk this way...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 30 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 1/24/2005
Should I reviews
Your all in trouble when my stinger grows back...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 81 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 1/24/2005
Gather Round reviews
If I stood on a cliff, in front of the moon, playing an electric guitar as my hair blew in the wind. Then I would be cool!
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 23 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 1/24/2005
Believe Me reviews
I sail the seas in a ship made of Popsicle sticks and glue.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 102 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 1/24/2005
Little Joys reviews
My demon is laughing RUN!
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 17 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 1/24/2005
This Little Ball Of Life reviews
Fall to your knees and debase yourself before the mighty...or not.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 194 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/24/2005
The Key reviews
I am a spork Shaman.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 39 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/24/2005
Burning reviews
I cringe before a different kind of god.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 98 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 1/15/2005
I Am reviews
I was led astray by the television, but found my way back via the radio...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 130 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 1/15/2005
If reviews
If god was a strawberry I would eat him, cause man that would be one fine strawberry.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 18 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 1/15/2005
Why reviews
I tried to summon the spirit of Nostradamus to answer all my questions, but only got the spirit of Pooh. I learned little about life but much about honey.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 144 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/15/2005
Scars reviews
I'm afraid I took a turn for the worse and died in my sleep tomorrow.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 44 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/15/2005
For Diddlyshit reviews
Don't ask, it's a safe bet that I don't know what I'm thinking.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 49 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 1/15/2005
Buttermilk Sunshine reviews
Gobstoppers are the fruit of a candy god. mmmmm Gobstoppers.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 18 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 1/15/2005
Strawberry Daydreams reviews
I like to bath in strawberry jello.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 57 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/8/2005
For Two By Two reviews
I hope I reincarnate as a tiger, cause man tigers are cool.
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 46 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 1/8/2005
I Will Be Free reviews
I ate a worm once, but not on purpose.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 179 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/8/2005
A Whisper In The Wind reviews
I wonder what I would smell like if boiled in oil?
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 59 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/8/2005
Not Today reviews
I think the heads of all religions should fight it out in a cage match to the death, then we would know once and for all who's god was stronger. Oh and also cause it would be just about the funniest thing I ever saw. lol...old men fighting, hehe.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 109 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 1/8/2005
Calluses reviews
The Easter bunny and I are not on speaking terms anymore. Not since the rubber ball incident.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 126 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/8/2005
Faults reviews
Note to self, fat people are not always jolly...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 63 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/8/2005
Gathering Darkness reviews
I followed the light in the darkness, but it was only a giant angler fish that ate me.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 159 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 1/8/2005
Secrets reviews
I mailed myself an anonymous Christmas card, just to keep me guessing.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 99 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/8/2005
For Elves Stole My Baby reviews
I absorbed my inner child while trying to fast.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 85 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 1/8/2005
Lost reviews
How many people with ADD does it take to change a...look, a flower!
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 120 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/8/2005
Mad Landscape reviews
My body keeps telling me I'm dead...but I just ignore it.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 93 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 1/8/2005
Blind reviews
Santa drinks the blood of sinners.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 44 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 1/8/2005
Truth Is Not Paid For reviews
My skeleton keeps trying to escape it's meat prison.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 80 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 1/8/2005
For Jimmy The Hamster reviews
The cats ate the mailman...I warned him to knock!
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 55 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1/8/2005
Good and Evil reviews
I made a mockery of time. It's retribution is slow but painful.
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 27 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 1/8/2005
Fire It Up reviews
Bums taste like old shoes.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 60 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 1/8/2005
Ashes in the Void reviews
I’ve been trying to stop eating unicorn meat for years…but I just can’t.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 100 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/31/2004
Yin and Yang reviews
Creationism is the root of all evil!
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 121 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/31/2004
Dreams of Rain reviews
A man on T.V. said that if you hit a midget on the head you get 40 gold coins...It's not true, It's not true at all. :(
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 96 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/31/2004
To Swim With The Fishes reviews
My garden gnome keeps killing my neighbors...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 83 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/28/2004
Sword Dance reviews
I dance in puddles...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 97 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12/28/2004
For Three If By Air reviews
I use weighted dice... :)
Poetry: Humor - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 73 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12/28/2004
The Seeker reviews
One hundred posts yeah for me!
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 141 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/28/2004
Personality and Bone reviews
Did you see which way I went?
Poetry: Life - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 19 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 12/20/2004
The Shoe Rebellion reviews
Beauty is whatever makes you smile!
Poetry: Humor - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 198 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 12/20/2004
Remember Me reviews
You found me in a black void, and left me in a whirlwind of transient nothingness.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 98 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/20/2004
Little Brothers reviews
Will you still love me when the sky glows red with my rage?
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 122 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/20/2004
Jacob's Rage reviews
How similar we are to monkey's, some of us more then other's...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 87 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/15/2004
Sword Song reviews
98% Water, 0.5% Meat and Drugs, 1.5% Sugar, = ME.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 74 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/15/2004
For Ratbastard reviews
Assassins came and knifed my pillow again, thank god I sleep in the closet... opps.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 65 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/15/2004
For Foolhardy reviews
Dragons will sing of my death, then toast my corpse with mushrooms.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 79 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12/15/2004
Cerulean reviews
I painted God once but lost the picture.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 81 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/15/2004
Space Men Cometh reviews
I burnt my social security card in hopes that I would cease to exist.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 172 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/15/2004
How Unlike the Whippoorwill reviews
I'm lost on the road to nowhere...
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 82 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/13/2004
The Wanderer reviews
A village learns that people are not always what they appear to be.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,015 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/13/2004
One Cold Morning reviews
Strawberries make me smile. :)
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 86 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/13/2004
Envy the Ignorant reviews
Floating away on bubbles of joy and nitrous.
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 89 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 12/13/2004
Cracks in my Cortex reviews
I bleed syrup...
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 32 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/13/2004
Dejected reviews
Time is a river I like to pee in...
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 67 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12/12/2004
Broken Morning reviews
Long live the Anonymous!
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 66 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/12/2004
Silence reviews
I wish I had plush ears so I could hear what the stuffed animals were saying.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 162 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12/11/2004
Notes From the Colony reviews
I ate a pixie once. I only got sparkly poo though, not at all the outcome I had hoped for.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 52 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/10/2004
Atheists Christmas reviews
Jesus ate my liver, then replaced it with holy light. Unfortunately this does not process waste well...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 96 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/10/2004
Terza Rima reviews
I die in my dreams...
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 127 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12/10/2004
For Scoobydoodoo reviews
I stepped in poo this morning and almost wrote about it. But I decided instead that the incident was dead to me and had never actually happened. Do you smell something?
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 114 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/10/2004
Mountains of Mystery reviews
I ate my stash this morning...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 69 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/10/2004
Spirit Hawk reviews
Hello? Where the hell am I...
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 80 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/10/2004
My Sweet Drool Machine reviews
I am so many people I have forgotten all their names.
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 80 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/10/2004
Dark Path reviews
I pee sunshine!
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 111 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12/10/2004
Bad Choice reviews
The whiskey and bandages did little for my shredded soul.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 168 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/10/2004
For Cantebury Jane reviews
My soul is eroding like the rocks on which I trod.
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 101 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/10/2004
Wicked Winds reviews
I am a slave to the masses.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 88 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/10/2004
Hidden in Fantasy reviews
Time is my enemy.
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 161 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12/10/2004
Visions of Past reviews
Why won't you let me put spaces in my villanelles, bastard program...
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 165 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 12/5/2004
Inevitable reviews
Death doesn't bother me, its living that puts a bunch in my shorts.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 87 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 12/5/2004
Inverted Vertigo reviews
My head hurts when I imagine infinity.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 78 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 12/4/2004
One More Day reviews
A condemned General contemplates the circumstances that brought him to his present state.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 834 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 12/3/2004
Breathe reviews
I was God once but quit when I grew tired of your endless plight.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 144 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12/3/2004
Tomato reviews
Pasley pirates pilfer pointedly while painfully pontificating.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 117 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 12/3/2004
Eyes reviews
Dizzy dragons dive daringly down during the daytime.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 14 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12/3/2004
Confiscated Sausage reviews
Man, I crack my shit up!
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 202 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12/3/2004
The Last Bastion reviews
All that stands between the last fortress of humanity and its destruction at the hands of demonic forces is a brave king and his men.
Fiction: Fable - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,683 - Reviews: 10 - Published: 11/27/2004
Screaming Towards Oblivion reviews
Human meat tastes like pork... :)
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 130 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 11/24/2004
The Cabin Boy's Lament reviews
They should invent a candy that screams when you bite it. and bleeds nougat.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 304 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 11/23/2004
Solipsist's Funeral reviews
How many Solipsist's does it take to change a light bulb...whom shall I say is asking?
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 129 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/22/2004
Trapped in Unreal reviews
I am a loadstone for weirdos.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 193 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 11/21/2004
Song of the Godless reviews
I'd be tyrant if I wasn't so lazy...
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 79 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 11/20/2004
Diamante Palindrome reviews
Ya get it huh, huh... :)
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 11/20/2004
Chaos of Dreams reviews
God ate my homework...
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 137 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 11/14/2004
Villanelle Style reviews
The demons pantsed me in the grocery line...again,
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 167 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/14/2004
Contaminated Harvest reviews
My apple is bleeding...
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 35 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 11/10/2004
Killing the Paperboy reviews
For Davin.Long live the fighters. I often fight with myself, but its always a draw...
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 147 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/6/2004
Darkest of Days reviews
50 yeah for me...I once put 50 pieces of gum in my mouth on a dare, it was hard to chew. I also found it hard to chew when I was dead.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 69 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 11/6/2004
Diamante Style X2 reviews
I really like sweets, especially the kind with peanut butter, I like the way it feels when I eat it, I'm not snobbish I eat both smooth and chunky. Did you know peanuts grow underground? I always thought they grew on trees...
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 32 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 11/6/2004
English Sonnet reviews
If you know of other styles you think I might like Lady Jane, just let me know, and anyone else for that matter.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 114 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 11/6/2004
Spenserian Sonnet reviews
God ate my shoe...
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 130 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/6/2004
Cinquain Style reviews
These will probably get left justified, like the Palindrome and Diamante styles did. So just imagine it centered lol.
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 37 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 11/6/2004
Acrostic Style reviews
Ok I added rhyming but I was bored...Deal :)
Poetry: General - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 45 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 11/6/2004
Pantoum Style reviews
I ate my shirt today...
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 78 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 11/5/2004
Palindrome reviews
blah blah blah
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 21 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 11/5/2004
Monorhyme Style reviews
And another
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 84 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 11/5/2004
Diamante Style reviews
Yet another style
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 11/5/2004
Clerihew Style reviews
I
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 26 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 11/5/2004
Limerick reviews
lol
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 33 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 11/5/2004
Epitaphs reviews
Playing with diffrent styles today.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 54 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 11/5/2004
Wandered Away reviews
Could happen.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 130 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 11/5/2004
To Be King reviews
This fell out my head this morning enjoy!
Poetry: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 402 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 11/4/2004
Captive of Fear reviews
A little truth.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 154 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 11/2/2004
Nothing reviews
...
Poetry: Life - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 49 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 11/1/2004
Killing my Dealer reviews
Just so you know, motsugori is poisonous blow fish.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: M - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 404 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/1/2004
The Gray Man reviews
Thoughts about balance
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 138 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 11/1/2004
Visions of You reviews
One for my ladie.
Poetry: Love - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 112 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/1/2004
Finding Balance reviews
A trip into my world.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 196 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/31/2004
Epiphany reviews
Have I seen the light?
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 142 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/31/2004
For Fortress of Steve reviews
Toilet Material
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 55 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 10/31/2004
Berserk reviews
For my favorite Anime.
Poetry: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 196 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/30/2004
For Sisterdarkness reviews
Yeah I love me too.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 93 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 10/30/2004
The Smell of Reality reviews
How's it smell?
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 92 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 10/30/2004
For Jolly Roger reviews
Arr.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 146 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 10/30/2004
For my Fans reviews
God I love you guys.
Poetry: Family - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 113 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/27/2004
Penn and Teller reviews
I wish I could have been in Dresden.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 129 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/27/2004
Slamming the Theist reviews
In loving Memory of Jesus 0-33 AD
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 244 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/27/2004
Dragon's Repast reviews
Would you find it worth it.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 285 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 10/26/2004
Fairy Dilemma reviews
First aliens now fairies...
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 321 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/26/2004
Vulcan's Lament reviews
Nature is a harsh mistress.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 197 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 10/25/2004
Aliens reviews
Aliens broke my bong.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 291 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 10/24/2004
Drifting reviews
guess
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 134 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/23/2004
Soldier's Death reviews
No freebies read it.
Poetry: War - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 144 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/23/2004
Darkest of Friends reviews
Watching
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 159 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/15/2004
Drowning reviews
Drowning
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 104 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/15/2004
Am I Awake reviews
The lonliness of existence examined.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 107 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/15/2004
Body of Sin reviews
My dark thought for the day. Enjoy.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 67 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/1/2004
Fredrick the Great reviews
A little insight.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 137 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/29/2004
Feral reviews
Beware my wrath.
Poetry: War - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 131 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/28/2004
Existence is Futile reviews
You know!
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 116 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/26/2004
For Fiddlesticks reviews
For my favorite reviewer. You rock, man.
Poetry: Haiku - Rated: T - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 24 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 9/24/2004
Mind Killer reviews
Some think my mind is already dead.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 154 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 9/22/2004
I Who Am I reviews
Written in 8th grade or so. Just an experiment in amusing myself! :)
Poetry: Humor - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 41 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/17/2004
Descent reviews
Are the experiences of living worth the death waiting for you at the end? You be the judge.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 59 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 9/17/2004
Lost Moments reviews
A man contemplates the meaning of death while floating alone in space.
Fiction: Sci-Fi - Rated: K - English - Sci-Fi/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 330 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/15/2004