Hello. My name is Sally. Now here aresome things you should know about me.

- I am an atheist, so if you see any sort of atheist stuff in my story, suck it up.

- I am straight. So if you don't like straight stuff in my stories, go crying to your mum, you friggin' heterophobes.

- There aren't any X-rated scenes in my stories. Go crawling and sobbing to you mum and report it to the police.

And now, since you know so much about me, here's the rest of my profile which would have gone on forever if I could have been bothered to type it and if I thought you could be bothered reading it.

Name: Sally

DOB: 5/9/1876

Respect your elders, beyatch.