Heatless Flame
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Joined 06-02-05, id: 479281, Profile Updated: 02-28-08
Author has written 5 stories for Essay, and Fantasy.


I am the Heatless Flame, and its good to meet you! Yes anyway... heres some stuff about me.

First and foremost, I have been writing since I was in sixth grade, and ever since I loved the creativity that flows through my body as I put ideas to pen (rather Microsoft Word). I am fourteen currently, and despite being a fairly talented writer for my age, I suffer from extreme writer's block. I can get ideas in the blink of an eye, but putting them down as tangible throughts and notion. Urgh. But I digress.

I have two favorite sets of books. The best series I have ever read is undoubtedly the Bartimaues Trilogy. I highly reccommend it for excellent and refreshing characters, some comedic asides, and action to spare. After that comes The Ranger Apprentice Series, of which there are currently 7 in their origin country (Australia). They have, again, some humor, lovely characters, and superb action quality.

Ugh. Eragon sucks. Weak, Mary sue characters, overly complex details, an obnoxious writer, boring and overwritten plot. Worst series ever.

Here are dozens of quotes to entertain yourself with.

At least half of these are by Groucho Marx.

"There is a fine line between genius insanity. I have erased this line"- Unknown

"A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere."- Groucho Marx

"I live because I can, but I write because I must." -Heatless Flame

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."- Groucho Marx

"The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug."-Mark Twain

"A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five."-Groucho Marx

"You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you"-Ray Bradbury

"Easy reading is damn hard writing."-Nathaniel Hawthorne

"She’s so in love with me, she doesn’t know anything. That’s why she’s in love with me."- Groucho Marx

" France is to war as Britain is to cooking." -Mark Twain

"If my doctor told me I had six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood. I'd type a bit faster."-Isaac Asimov

"The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open."- Groucho Marx

"I love being a writer. What I can't stand is the paperwork." -Peter De Vries

"Do not put statements in the negative form.
And don't start sentences with a conjunction.
If you reread your work, you will find on rereading that a
great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.
Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.
Unqualified superlatives are the worst of all.
De-accession euphemisms.
If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
Last, but not least, avoid cliches like the plague."

~William Safire, "Great Rules of Writing

"Metaphors are like similes." -Author unknown

"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I don’t know."- Groucho Marx

"A synonym is the word you use when you cannot spell the other one."-Baltasar Gracian

"If I don't write to empty my mind, I go mad." -Lord Bryon

"I was married by a judge. I should've asked for a jury."- Groucho Marx

"I married your mother because I wanted children. Imagine my disappointment when you arrived."-Groucho Marx

"I'd rather be caught holding up a bank than stealing so much as a two-word phrase from another writer." ~Jack Smith

"Most editors are failed writers- but so are most writers." -T.S. Elliot

"In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians, and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people."- Groucho Marx

“Pen names are masks that allow us to unmask ourselves.” ~C. Astrid Weber

“As to the adjective, when in doubt, strike it out.” ~Mark Twain

"You know you’ve got the brain of a four-year old child, and I bet he was glad to get rid of it."- Groucho Marx

“If I'm trying to sleep, the ideas won't stop. If I'm trying to write, there appears a barren nothingness.” ~Carrie Latet

“The coroner will find ink in my veins and blood on my typewriter keys.” ~C. Astrid Weber

"I know, heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns."- Groucho Marx

“Your manuscript is both good and original; but the part that is good is not original, and the part that is original is not good.” ~Author Unknown

“I am a man, and alive... For this reason I am a novelist. And being a novelist, I consider myself superior to the saint, the scientist, the philosopher, and the poet, who are all great masters of different bits of man alive, but never get the whole hog.” ~D.H. Lawrence

“An author in his book must be like God in the universe, present everywhere and visible nowhere.” ~Gustave Flaubert

“A man will turn over half a library to make one book.” ~Samuel Johnson

“A story should have a beginning, a middle, and an end... but not necessarily in that order.” ~Jean Luc Godard

“Being an author is having angels whisper in your ear - and devils, too. ~Graycie Harmon

“It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.” ~Robert Benchley

"Sir, are you trying to offer me a bribe? How much?"- Groucho Marx

“The person who writes for fools is always sure of a large audience.”-Arthur Schopenhauer

"There’s only one way to find out if a man is honest, ask him, if he says yes, you know he’s crooked."- Groucho Marx

“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.”-Groucho Marx

"I got a good mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it."-Groucho Marx

Now that you've read this, you are now convinced Groucho Marx is the funniest one-liner ever.


I work with Stop the Press, a newsletter for writers based here at FP. We are hosting a Writing challenge right now, and its free and easy to participate. For additional details on either the challenge or FP, please go here:


cough I am primarily a fantasy writer, although I dabble in mystery and sci-fi. Not to mention, I consider my best ability is writing action scenes, of which I am inspired by the blade and such.


Finally, please read my various works if you have wasted time on this! Bye!

I pledge to review any fiction I read, no matter how much I dislike it or how tired I am. Only post this if you mean it. Copy into your profile if you do.


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Paladin by Casey Drake reviews
A guy. A girl. A spell. One HECK of a twist. Welcome to Avadur.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 23,437 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 1/16/2009 - Published: 12/23/2006
Devshirme by E.B. Keane-Farrell reviews
After being torn from his family by the Cuabone Empire as part of the devshirme tax, Mateo Dooley works his way through life training to become a janissary, but also unraveling the jarring mysteries of his realm and the magic that cannot limit him.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Supernatural - Chapters: 7 - Words: 20,152 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 4/5/2008 - Published: 1/29/2008
The Future of Fantasy: REMIX by Ryoma90 reviews
At 21 years of age, Josh McMillan is the wealthy owner of his own company. He's engaged to be married to a wonderful woman, and things are only looking up. However, when she's murdered by an unknown assassin, everything begins to change.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 49 - Words: 61,208 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 9/4/2007 - Published: 6/25/2007 - Complete
Anomalies by Dawnella reviews
A magician who talks to his wand And believe me, the wand talks back...A vampire who can't stomach blood...And a walking, talking plant. Strange things are happening. Does it mean anything important, or is it simply unfortunate coincidence?
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,171 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/18/2007 - Published: 8/5/2007
Cruelty, Malice, and Freedom by Dawnella reviews
A tale of two girls. Both are slaves, but they are so different...One is kept for her great powers, yet is walked all over; the other for her great beauty, yet always she fights. Can they team up and escape together?
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 20 - Words: 36,403 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/30/2006 - Published: 3/4/2006
Guide For Fictionpress Reviews by ColorCrayons reviews
This is Mack from Clodhopper. My cousin and I have been asked a few times how we get so many reviews. This is our response. I hope it helps!
Fiction: Essay - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,744 - Reviews: 119 - Favs: 137 - Follows: 18 - Published: 8/7/2005
Writing with Diversity by Eyetk reviews
[Complete] You've got a wonderful plot, and well developed, intriguing characters, but you're still striving to make your work better. Perhaps this can help!
Fiction: Essay - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,090 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 6/28/2005 - Published: 6/18/2005 - Complete
Constructive criticism by Werecat99 reviews
Tired of the 'plz r&r my stuff' reviews? Read these simple guidelines to constructive criticism. Tips on how to get more reviews included.
Fiction: Essay - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,032 - Reviews: 212 - Favs: 140 - Published: 2/24/2004
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Blade of Baikon reviews
His Blade. A group of the most deadly law enforcer assassins ever seen. Or perhaps never seen, for their skills in the shadows are legendary. Is an internal war enough to destroy them?
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,800 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 3/1/2008 - Published: 2/2/2008
Black Arrow Chronicles: Book 1 reviews
Glaze, a lone assassin, is accused of betraying the Resistance. Already the top enemy against the Empire, who will he side with? The one who he hates or the ones who betrayed him?
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,706 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 11/11/2007 - Published: 10/11/2007
A Guide to Action Scenes reviews
This is a basic guide to writing an action scene, may it be actual pbattle, verbal, or anything such. This is NOT a full guide, and I suggest several others that can be found in my C2, Helpful Writing Guides.
Fiction: Essay - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,450 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/6/2007 - Complete
Hunter's Mistake reviews
A clever old dragon... a foolish hunter... angry dragon... lots of dots.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,604 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Published: 10/3/2007 - Complete
Batman vs the Crowd reviews
Batman. The sole superhero without powers. Why's he so much better than Superman? Lets examine that, shall we?
Fiction: Essay - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 532 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/6/2007 - Complete
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