beatrice is hot
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Joined 04-12-06, id: 520540
Author has written 11 stories for Love, Politics, Friendship, General, Life, Essay, and General.
My name is Beatrice.
I'm old enough to drive but not old enough to drink.
I'm very cute and orgasmically witty.

My three favorite bands are The New Pornographers, The Postal Service, and Nickel Creek.
My three favorite writers are Joseph Heller, Amy Tan, and William Shakespeare.

Send me all the hatemail you want. Leave me as many bad reviews as you want. I can take it, and besides--in the end, you just want me.
I always review back.
I always review honestly. If I like your stuff, you'll know. If I don't, you'll know why.

Please don't expect a good review from me if you don't proofread. Please don't expect a thoughtful reply from me if the emails you send aren't proofread. I'm far too busy being cute and witty to deal with them.
What else is important? I think boys who write well are hot, and I think semi-colons are sexy.

I write a lot of poetry. I read a lot of books. I had an affair with and he writes great prose.

Read my stuff. Make my day.

NOTICE: I'm looking for one (1) person to be my fictionpress friend--an official sort of friend, who can read my stuff before I post it and tell me whether or not it's any good, who can give advice and be generally good-natured. If interested, please email me and give me one good reason why we should be fictionpress friends.

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screw by Iris Early reviews
erratic rhyme scheme, tenuous grasp of poetry in general. pretty words make graves. tell me what you think.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 114 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/10/2007 - Complete
oh hollywood hello by poet tree reviews
abandoned for porn stars in the twinkling lights where we left marilyn broken and bruised
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 237 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 1/2/2007 - Complete
sandboxes by Static Genesis reviews
wasn't it easy when we were children and created our own worlds in the sandbox?
Poetry: Life - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 62 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/7/2006
Cinderella by eden is burning reviews
... Summary-less
Poetry: Love - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 89 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 7/13/2006
On My Knees by Prevaricate reviews
on my knees for a man again
Poetry: Religion - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 44 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 5 - Published: 10/14/2005
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

RaggedyAnn reviews
A shortstory to the prompt Something's Not Right. A man reflects on his life, which is a little anticlimactic and filled with desire for something he's not getting from sleeping with various women on business trips. A twist at the end.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 553 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 1/15/2008 - Complete
Survivor's Guilt reviews
A personal reflection on the five steps of accepting loss and how useless they are. An exploration of the personal nature of grief and mourning. Please let me know what you think.
Fiction: Essay - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 676 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 7/29/2007 - Complete
Two Poems, Untitled reviews
Two short poems about missing love while separated. It's hard, even for a little while. These are short, and if you've ever missed someone while they've been away I hope you read them and relate.
Poetry: Love - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 103 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 7/29/2007 - Complete
A Love Poem For Alex, By Anna reviews
Out of character for me, but sweet and pretty. It's nothing more than what the title says it isthis is pure stuff, unadulterated sap, nothing cruel at all. It'll make you feel better if you read it. Bonus: rhetorical questions are answered!
Poetry: Love - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 127 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/7/2007 - Complete
Babies and Cosmopolitans reviews're brilliant, and as much as I'd love to hate you, you're my archetypal hero, and you make my inksplotch life's meaning crystal clear... We're best friends with kissessoul matesand I'm also bitterly jealous of you. Oh, good. R&R. Do it
Poetry: Love - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 180 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/6/2007 - Complete
Actually Untitled reviews
I hate poetry. Or, I meanI hate analysis of poetry. Why can't you just let a nice thing stay the way it is? This is short. Read it, because it'll brighten your day. Review it, because you'll brighten mine.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 41 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 2/25/2007
Why To Be is Irregular reviews
Forget my vitals, this is the surest sign that I'm aliveThis, a raging something that couldn't bemore intuitive or elusiveThis is about sex and life. Human nature. Read. Review.
Poetry: Love - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 82 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 11/30/2006 - Complete
It's an American Thing reviews
Very explicit. Scathing cynicism, bitterness, the works. It's your moral duty to read this. Yeah, girls, she's lucky to be so liberatedso freeso lucky to livein America, whereoppressionis a foreign word...
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 190 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/3/2006 - Complete
elaine, dancing reviews
and elaine danced to the radioand elainie saw beauty where there was nonefinding beauty in obscuritysecuring hopefor herself and me. This is sweet. The nicest thing I've ever written, and it's not about boys or sex. For once. Read it. Review it. Make my
Poetry: Friendship - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 109 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/11/2006 - Complete
Sanctuary reviews
you hoard secrets with meanings you forgot to remembersince it's more important to know than to'll wish you'd had your voice. About the Bush Administration. I hate being lied to.
Poetry: Politics - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 227 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/15/2006 - Complete
Fingertips reviews
Reminding us of things we're old enough to want but not old enough to understand. This is about sex. Read it. Let me know.
Poetry: Love - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 121 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 5 - Published: 4/15/2006 - Complete