martyfalafel
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Joined 06-16-06, id: 528756, Profile Updated: 04-11-10
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Hiring a Hooligan by Deena reviews
Determined to put the fear of God into the racist homophobe who messed up her best friend, mild-mannered Jane Hazelton resorts to hiring a thug to do the job. Trouble is, said thug isn’t interested in money, he’s interested in her. **COMPLETED**
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 110,036 - Reviews: 2358 - Favs: 3,532 - Follows: 806 - Updated: 8/23/2013 - Published: 9/3/2005 - Complete
When Worlds Collide, They Do Not Shatter by tuieri reviews
It's amazing what one line can do... 27 one sentence oneshots and the stories that go with them.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,398 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/15/2013 - Published: 1/28/2007
Six Weeks With Satan by woodstock1969 reviews
It should have been the best summer ever: a six week tour with my choir through six major cities in Europe. Sounds amazing, right? I thought so too, until I remembered who was going with me: Kurt Matthews, my obnoxious, infuriating nemesis. Oh joy.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 130,794 - Reviews: 1022 - Favs: 1,603 - Follows: 490 - Updated: 8/21/2012 - Published: 2/12/2007 - Complete
Help! I'm Trapped in a Love Polygon! by Follow The Pendulum reviews
Braelyn likes her best friend’s brother who is crushing on the new girl who likes Braelyn’s brother who likes Braelyn’s best friend who has a crush on his best friend who loves Braelyn. Throw in a nerd and an odd narrator. How will this end?
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 43,731 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 7/25/2010 - Published: 12/2/2006
11:11 by candid reviews
Wishes, like people, have their flaws. One shot!
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,073 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Published: 9/13/2009 - Complete
Don't Make A Scene by SamanthaNicole reviews
REMOVED. There are loads of things out there I'm not exactly fond of. For example: string beans, getting up early, doing homework, and Ryan Bradley. He was number one on my list. And he was trouble.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11 - Reviews: 929 - Favs: 928 - Follows: 255 - Updated: 6/3/2009 - Published: 9/20/2007 - Complete
A Marriage Of Convenience by Spooky152 reviews
She thought arranged marriages were for princesses and girls in India. Boy, was she ever wrong. COMPLETE
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 39 - Words: 98,917 - Reviews: 1170 - Favs: 893 - Follows: 168 - Updated: 3/28/2009 - Published: 3/1/2003 - Complete
Love Notes by The Cat Died Nobly reviews
To her, the class was possibly the dullest thing she could ever do. That is, until the day she found a little note written on her desk from a boy the period before her...and things got a little more interesting. Short, cute oneshot; NOW WITH A FOLLOW UP!
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,508 - Reviews: 309 - Favs: 798 - Follows: 81 - Updated: 3/23/2008 - Published: 11/4/2007 - Complete
The Tutoring Contract by pinkshades reviews
Tutoring's never been this complicated, thanks to Wes McDermott. He'll ignore you, then charm you. He'll insult you, then ask you out. With little studying going on, all Amy wants is for Wes to pick up a textbook ... before she murders him with it.DELETED
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,484 - Reviews: 968 - Favs: 994 - Follows: 942 - Updated: 3/17/2008 - Published: 2/16/2007
Kiss of Twilight: Prelude to an Evening by Ranting Forever n Rambling On reviews
Because of my mother, I've been cursed with a deformity. The only way to break it is to be afflicted with a different curse: one that involves sleeping for all eternity until awakened by love's first kiss, which will never happen with my prince charming..
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 37 - Words: 164,726 - Reviews: 580 - Favs: 381 - Follows: 137 - Updated: 3/8/2008 - Published: 2/24/2007 - Complete
my imaginary friend died today by a silenced revolution reviews
or maybe i killed her. i can't quite recall.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 171 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 6 - Published: 2/18/2008 - Complete
Peas by Spooky152 reviews
I started looking at the French fries one case over, but when you stand in front of one single case in the frozen foods section for 15 minutes, the stockboys think of you as the lonely, slightly overweight woman they read horror stories about.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 992 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/30/2008 - Complete
Time Woke Up by srasco reviews
God wakes Time up by tripping over him.
Fiction: Supernatural - Rated: K - English - Supernatural/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 700 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Published: 12/24/2007 - Complete
A Letter To My Daughter by mochaxmuffin reviews
10 simple guidelines as to how you will mingle with the opposite sex. YOU WILL NEVER RISK YOUR PURITY AND MORALITY! Understand? This is a satirical piece making fun of parents' paranoid fear that their daughters will become promiscuous.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 784 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Published: 12/19/2007 - Complete
tell me, preacher man by fading innocence reviews
tell me why our Father has left us.
Poetry: Religion - Rated: T - English - Drama/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 235 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 11/14/2007 - Complete
Spork by Leylique Morrow reviews
You're much too thin,' the spoon replied, her pride but slightly hurt. 'And as for being fat' she spat, 'I'll have you know they're curves'
Poetry: Humor - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 737 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 25 - Updated: 10/1/2007 - Published: 7/27/2005
Green Peppers and Sausage by something to prove reviews
Sometimes love is like a pizza... sort of... [oneshot entirely in dialogue, rated for language]
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,503 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 7 - Published: 9/26/2007 - Complete
Eulogies and Post It Notes Can Change the World! by Imaginary Parachute reviews
[VERY LONG ONE SHOT] Abe Pruitt is going to improve the world, and she's doing it with sticky notes. Jack St. James is going to keep on being bothersome, and he looks good doing it, damn him. Doesn't it suck when the tables are turned? [EDITED]
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 13,743 - Reviews: 365 - Favs: 1,287 - Follows: 91 - Updated: 6/29/2007 - Published: 6/5/2007 - Complete
Koibito no Ryu by paws-bells reviews
COMPLETE Sarea had led a fairly normal life until that arrogant, pompous snake chose to drop in on her. Literally. Then she learns that she is his lifemate and that dragons actually exist. No, they really do. And he just happens to be their crown prince.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 31 - Words: 138,724 - Reviews: 1617 - Favs: 3,030 - Follows: 477 - Updated: 11/11/2006 - Published: 5/4/2006 - Complete
Just Forget Her It's That Simple by Stormy Daye reviews
How do you summarize a poem? Read it, love it.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 179 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/5/2006
Profile by Stormy Daye reviews
(short story) If I tell you what she wasn't, can you tell me why she did it?
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,517 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Published: 6/12/2006
The Art of Death by SadisticZephyr reviews
A essay of death. A justification of murder, perhaps? You decide...
Fiction: Essay - Rated: T - English - Horror/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 975 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 6/10/2006
Cheese, Crackers, Milk, Sandwich by Frore reviews
There are one hundred forty six ways to kill someone with a fork. Judging by the body at her feet, Keira guessed she’d mastered at least three.
Fiction: Horror - Rated: M - English - Horror/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,892 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 6 - Published: 4/1/2006
The Lucky Penny by arachibutyrophobia reviews
Story taken down due to plaigarism concerns. My apologies.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 62 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 5 - Published: 2/5/2006 - Complete
Breasts, Hips, and Honesty by Squeaks the Jester reviews
Complete. Reflections of a teenager on gender, image, and other such shit.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 913 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/1/2006
Mating Habits of the Popular and the Petty by Myrika reviews
A certain prom night's events tore apart six friends. Loyalties splintered and love spoiled. Newcomer Jas Lindsay must figure out what really happened. //REMOVED//
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 4,194 - Reviews: 3864 - Favs: 1,440 - Follows: 117 - Updated: 12/20/2005 - Published: 8/22/2005 - Complete
Petals by Danielle Night reviews
COMPLETE In nineteenth century London, it isn't considered proper for a young lady to send flowers to a healthy young bachelor. But when Adrian Morey receives a bouquet with a challenge, he can't help but be intrigued.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 35,743 - Reviews: 925 - Favs: 1,799 - Follows: 152 - Updated: 9/1/2005 - Published: 1/23/2005 - Complete
The Purpose of Calculus by B Eskew reviews
You will understand this if you have ever taken a Calculus course.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 415 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/20/2004 - Complete