Naked Penguin Fetus For Pope
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Joined 09-21-06, id: 541161, Profile Updated: 10-28-11
Author has written 1 story for Romance.

I know there's a lot of people waiting for a sequel of TCTTA (or a Pringles update) but it is quite obviously never going to happen. Yes, I said I was going to come back and whatnot but, yeah, no. A lot of authors abandon their stories entirely and never come back but I didn't want to be like that. SO I figured I'd at least kill your hopes and dreams because I'm nice like that. I felt like I had to do this because the community here was so good to me back then and even now with all the great reviews you guys have left me. I did write the first two or so chapters of the sequel to TCTTA but I just can't do it. For two reasons:

1.) who I am now is not who I was in '07. I mean, I was 14 back then! (yeah, yeah, I lied about my age. what kid on the internet hasn't)

2.) I have no faith in my writing abilities at all

I've written some fanfiction and have posted them online and everything was good but that was only temporary. But I haven't posted any original fiction since '08 or whatever. I am currently writing but I'm not sure if I'll ever post again. I mean, I cringe when I reread TCTTA. Everything is all over the place. I get that people love the humor and other stuff despite that but, from my standpoint, it's just awful. Maybe when I realize that my writing has developed in the past 4 years, I'll share my new stories with you guys. But no promises!

Anyway, I'm really sorry. I truly do love this community still and I know some of you guys probably won't forgive me but I really am sorry.

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Art Criticism by Blue GhostGhost reviews
Down for publication. You can follow updates on this on my Tumblr. My job at Melissa Anderten Gallery was hard enough without the input of the most annoying photographer on the planet. God, I hate that guy.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,562 - Reviews: 343 - Favs: 577 - Follows: 147 - Updated: 8/16/2012 - Published: 8/24/2010 - Complete
Almost As Much As I Love Pickles by Luci-chan's Lunchbox Of Doom reviews
Eli lives with three perfect roommates. Even though they all seem to like and accept him, what happens when you just don't think you're good enough? [slash and some mild het][WIP]
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 36,714 - Reviews: 291 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 91 - Updated: 9/20/2009 - Published: 4/15/2007
To Bask in the Moonlight by NPB4Ever reviews
M/M Taylor is a very pretty crossdressing teenager who enjoys stealing his younger sister's clothes. But then a cute guy comes up to him in a bookstore and there are major problems brainwise. Should he or Shouldn't he?
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 35,242 - Reviews: 125 - Favs: 111 - Follows: 94 - Updated: 9/9/2009 - Published: 2/14/2006
Chocolate Covered BoxerBriefs by CaseyBear reviews
Jayden woke up gay one day, literally, and decided that he would make everyone's lives a living hell. Cause he is a giver like that. A story that beats all of those cliche slash stories up. Slash.
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 41,352 - Reviews: 777 - Favs: 706 - Follows: 329 - Updated: 7/20/2009 - Published: 8/27/2007 - Complete
LostDreams f o r g o t t e nInnocence by blast off reviews
I'm not gay. Never was, never will be. Sending me to an all-guy school won't help any, but damnit, I just want to go home. It's all his fault, anyway.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 154 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 10/12/2008 - Published: 12/19/2006
Sorry, I thought you were a Terrorist by Nara Merald reviews
-Wish 1- Note to self: Do not become private investigator. Suck at investigating. Screwed things big time. Also broke vase. Think Heath hates me now. Slash. SEQUEL UP.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 84,585 - Reviews: 553 - Favs: 480 - Follows: 168 - Updated: 8/1/2008 - Published: 7/15/2006 - Complete
Bless Me Father by ILGMA reviews
Yeah, perfectly normal', Drake thought, attempting to ignore the aching bulge in his pants. 'If said peer was a girl...' Two Catholic school boys, one distraught and the other confused. Slash.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 9,648 - Reviews: 1250 - Favs: 552 - Follows: 166 - Updated: 6/13/2008 - Published: 4/14/2002
Entrance X's by crazyspeedingcar reviews
[SLASH] Sebastian needs to get his priorities in order.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,959 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 3/6/2008 - Published: 6/5/2007
Transparent Paranoia by NPB4Ever reviews
M/M Cill is a boy with many problems He hates Everything and is obsessed with strange objects But then Kelsi comes along with plans of destroying his hater ways Meanwile, little gay boy Steve has some big problems
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 17 - Words: 43,969 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 2/14/2008 - Published: 12/30/2005
Cold Fire by I'll Be Your Fairytale reviews
When peasant Kimran offers himself in exchange for his sister to a guy with a bad temper and a nasty sense of humour, who also happens to be drop dead gorgeous and a prince, what could possibly happen? R and R. AN: yaoi.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 23 - Words: 32,183 - Reviews: 159 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 91 - Updated: 12/19/2007 - Published: 12/13/2006
Once A Slave III: Magebreak by Katica Locke reviews
Teaser -- The simplest words are often the most difficult to say. While Lark struggles with his newly realized love for Sactaren, they must fight to save an innocent Werewolf, and have to pay a visit to one of the cruelest of all mages. Slash.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,250 - Reviews: 250 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 9/4/2007 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Toads by Luci-chan's Lunchbox Of Doom reviews
Sometimes you have to kiss a lot of toads before you find your prince. The story of a teenage girl and her thoughts on romance, dating, and guys, as well as the... fairer sex. [light light light yuri, some het, some drug use, much cursing...]
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,284 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/2/2007
U as in TURN by Luci-chan's Lunchbox Of Doom reviews
[WIP][mXm yaoi slash][Sequel to L as in TRAIN] Luke and Lorren made it through the eye of the storm, but were they simply deposited back at the beginning? And does that mean their love will be tested again? And is it strong enough to survive? Dry humor.
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 10,426 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 8/13/2007 - Published: 1/31/2007
Earth Tones by Luci-chan's Lunchbox Of Doom reviews
What do you do when your mother died in childbirth and your father left you with your [gay] godfathers, only to come back on your sixteenth birthday and demand custody? Ace, Justin, and Chris have to think of something, fast. [Slash]
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,590 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 8/13/2007 - Published: 12/7/2006
Blender by Luci-chan's Lunchbox Of Doom reviews
[WIP] Meet Maverick Bender. His friends call him Blender. He's about to shake up your idea of boarding school. [Rating may go up later]
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 28,304 - Reviews: 129 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 8/13/2007 - Published: 11/15/2006
Sex in Words by Marry My Pie Please reviews
(Slash) Luke wants to say he's normal, but let's face it... He isn't. For crying out loud, he writes letters to his next door neighbor!
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 59,088 - Reviews: 283 - Favs: 163 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 8/3/2007 - Published: 10/29/2005
Behind Broken Windows by Dirty-Angel-Toes reviews
What’s a guy to do when a stubborn, sexy, and somewhat clueless angel and his crossdressing accomplice crash quite literally into his life? [ Yaoi, MM slash, etc ]
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 26 - Words: 177,740 - Reviews: 674 - Favs: 540 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 6/15/2007 - Published: 3/15/2005 - Complete
Vampires Are Easy by Midnights Scream reviews
Vampire.Laban had never even met one until he went to a club and pissed one off.Now that vampire he met just once has become a big part of his life.Warning: MxM
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Horror - Chapters: 27 - Words: 66,423 - Reviews: 211 - Favs: 142 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 6/6/2007 - Published: 7/6/2006 - Complete
Once A Slave II: Magewise by Katica Locke reviews
Teaser - Lark discovers what it is to be a mage as he and Sactaren grow closer during their adventures. Slash.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,942 - Reviews: 470 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 5/22/2007 - Published: 11/14/2006 - Complete
French Kisses by I've-seen-the-fairies reviews
(SLASH M/M some F/F) French-Canadian Philippe is super shy, super geeky and super cute. He never thought the sexy goth boy would like him. He was so wrong.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 14 - Words: 30,558 - Reviews: 161 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 4/30/2007 - Published: 3/22/2006
Telran Academy by Zeero Angelfall reviews
Alex, Terry, and Jason are thrown together as roommates for their second or third year in Telran. When the three of them fall in love, what will they do about it? Read and find out. (M/M/M)
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 43 - Words: 121,122 - Reviews: 524 - Favs: 135 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 3/22/2007 - Published: 2/20/2004
We'll Never Know by NPB4Ever reviews
MaleMale ONESHOT. Jed likes his best friend and fellow track buddy Danell. Danell is seemingly too straight for words. Now how could a random suicidal maniac and a janitor’s closet change all that? We’ll Never Know ‘till we read!
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,752 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 3 - Published: 2/14/2007 - Complete
Out of Luck by d'Neronique reviews
[slash] No one wants something more than if they can’t have it. That’s why I believe the best way to get guys is to pretend you’re straight – and you had better believe it works like a charm.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 10 - Words: 42,254 - Reviews: 347 - Favs: 489 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 2/3/2007 - Published: 12/15/2006 - Complete
L as in TRAIN by Luci-chan's Lunchbox Of Doom reviews
[COMPLETE][SlashYaoiMxM] Meet Lorren. He hates the line. He hates the pervs, the stench, and the general human contact. Meet Luke. He's learning to love the line, and a certain person on it...
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 39,274 - Reviews: 297 - Favs: 138 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 1/31/2007 - Published: 1/9/2007 - Complete
Chemicals to Blind by Twisted By Design reviews
Colby is 17, cynical, and gay. After moving, he meets a girl who teaches him the meaning of friendship. Through her, he becomes comfortable with who he is and what he is, and finds himself doing something he never considered possible: falling in love.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 50,137 - Reviews: 330 - Favs: 205 - Follows: 194 - Updated: 1/24/2007 - Published: 12/15/2005
Shades Of Gray by Luci-chan's Lunchbox Of Doom reviews
COMPLETE BUT UNDERGOING MASSIVE REWRITE! Justin and Chris are back in another dynamic installment! Slash and light incest warnings!
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 25 - Words: 31,073 - Reviews: 279 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 1/2/2007 - Published: 4/30/2006 - Complete
Blank Canvas by Luci-chan's Lunchbox Of Doom reviews
[Yaoi Slash MxM MxF themes] After moving to rural Pennsylvania, the Fresk family's world fell apart. Now they have to pull each other from a world of sex, abuse, and betrayal to find happiness again. [COMPLETE!]
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 31 - Words: 67,083 - Reviews: 192 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 11/28/2006 - Published: 9/21/2006 - Complete
Magebound by Katica Locke: Chapter One by Katica Locke reviews
Teaser -- Lark is a slave, now the property of the enigmatic Traxen Mage. He’s used to hard work, but as the Mage’s assistant, he will face challenges he’s never imagined. Slash. Is now available on Amazon! Look for Magebound.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,890 - Reviews: 369 - Favs: 210 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 9/14/2006 - Published: 4/1/2006 - Complete
Cri de Coeur: Encore by Luci-chan's Lunchbox Of Doom reviews
[WIP] Years ago Tom and Harold fell in love. Now it seems like they’ve been given a second chance. The only problem? Tom’s fiancé. [Slash/Yaoi/MxM themes]
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 11,467 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 7/12/2006 - Published: 6/30/2006
It just happened by afk reviews
Yaoi->COMPLETE- Elijah is about to discover his sexual attraction, but the timing was a bit too bad... Will Gabriel have what it takes to get him out? Suck at Sum.
Fiction: Manga - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 28,332 - Reviews: 102 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 3/5/2006 - Published: 8/14/2004
WMSmoker seeks Seclusion by PirateGrrl reviews
Slash Clyde doesn't discriminate; he hates everyone equally.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 86,582 - Reviews: 792 - Favs: 1,246 - Follows: 121 - Updated: 1/12/2006 - Published: 3/28/2005 - Complete
The Cole Turns To Ash reviews
COMPLETE. 16 year old Cole is sarcastic, apathetic, pessimistic, and just well...a lump of coal. The complete opposite of one Ashton Matthews... Slash, male x male love
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 31 - Words: 219,659 - Reviews: 1224 - Favs: 977 - Follows: 267 - Updated: 8/28/2009 - Published: 12/27/2006 - Complete
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