This Isn't My Real Name
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Joined 08-27-07, id: 580411, Profile Updated: 07-17-10
Author has written 5 stories for Humor, Young Adult, and Fantasy.

I go by the moniker of Elissa, seeing as my parents bestowed it upon me.
I am 1.33 dozen years old, but that number changes as the year goes on.
I tend to write too many stories in the first person, and I have yet to write anything completely serious.
I like music. I play guitar, ukulele, and laptop.
The end.

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Overworlders by sorrybutmypendoesnthaveaname reviews
A story set in a world of fantasy and magic, told in the POV of the very narcissistic and sarcastic protagonist, Azrai, along with her worthless sidekick and pessimist of a brother, Velo. Heavily inspired by the 'Slayers' series by Hajime Kanzaka.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,838 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 12/15/2012 - Published: 2/18/2009
CoA: How to Rock a Paradox by rainbowjar reviews
In a high school technical theater group rife with plotlessness, illogicalness, and idiotic character names, will it be possible for one bright-eyed pseudo-intellectual to accomplish anything? Probably not. And so that brings us to my story...
Fiction: General - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Spiritual - Chapters: 28 - Words: 149,655 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/28/2009 - Published: 11/22/2008 - Complete
Just Like A Fruitcake by holiday road reviews
I said hi. He said he'd eat my eyeballs. I said to put his goggles on. He said he raped my cat. I said he's a cannibal Saiyan. He said he's a colorblind vampire. The psychic said we'd be gushing over each other by next year. Someone's lying.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 105,995 - Reviews: 358 - Favs: 266 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 5/16/2009 - Published: 7/17/2008 - Complete
Button Button by thejennamonster reviews
His name is Joe, and he works in a button factory.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,981 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Published: 1/20/2009 - Complete
Trouble by Pinkamoo reviews
I am sweet. I am innocent. I never get in trouble. I haven't just met an arrogant pervert who I want to castrate. I am lying.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 49,331 - Reviews: 268 - Favs: 294 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 10/26/2007 - Published: 5/17/2007 - Complete
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The Humdrum Tales of Dustin Dorglas reviews
Dustin Dorglas Qwerty-Lantern leads an off-kilter and yet stunningly uneventful life. These stories portray just that. A few are old stories I've recently rewritten and can be found at the back of the archive. T for language.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,171 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 7/16/2010 - Published: 10/26/2007
The Dream Catcher reviews
These are all dreams that I've actually had. Sometimes I wonder what kind of drugs my subconscious is on.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 20 - Words: 5,045 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 3/30/2010 - Published: 4/12/2009
The Truth About Fred T Harrison reviews
He was an evil man, but I got the feeling he made really, really good French toast. One-shot. T for language.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,203 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/9/2009 - Complete
Finding the Squid reviews
This is what I did with my French classes in eighth grade. Warning: this will probably leave you disoriented and confused. One-shot.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 910 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/19/2008 - Complete
Your Mom reviews
Joe says "Your mom!" too much. What will happen when someone finally decides they can't put up with it? One-shot.
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,430 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/19/2008 - Complete