Author has written 1 story for Humor.
I love reading. It's one of my most favorite things to do.
I'm not much of a writer though. so you probably won't see many stories up here..
Well, i have no idea what else to say. So, time for. . .
Fiction Press Awards Sites! WOOH!! :
Some Kind of Wonderful, SKOW (romance stories) -
Time is Running Out, TiRO (don't know what happened to this one...) -
The Fiction Press Supernatural Stories Awards (supernatural of course) -
Booyah Awards (don't really know, just look at it) -
all of these sites have some pretty amazing stories
Don't forget to vote for your favorite stories!
15 Things to do in Walmart!
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3 Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4 Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares... and see what happens.
5 Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M;'s on lay away.
6 Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7 Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8 When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9 Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10 While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
11 Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12 In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13 Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14 When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
( And; last, but not least!)
15 Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "Hey, there is no toilet paper in here!"
Ways to annoy/scare people in an elevator
1) Announce in a demonic voice: “I must find a more suitable host body.”
2) Apply dripping red paint around the edge of the roof hatch. When someone enters, look upwards and whisper "I think they want in..."
3) Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them. Press the wrong ones.
4) Ask, “did you hear that cable snapping sound?”
5) Bring a camera, take pictures of everybody in the elevator.
6) Call out, “Group hug!” and enforce it.
7) Draw a volleyball on the wall of the elevator and insist you have been trapped in there for 3 months. Formally introduce everyone to the volleyball.
8) Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, “That’s mine!”
9) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
10) Hold the elevator door open and say you’re waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, “Hi John, how’s your day been?”
11) Hum the theme to Jeopardy.
12) Leave a box in a corner, and when someone gets on, ask if they hear something ticking.
13) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
14) Say, while holding a paper with OUT OF ORDER written on it, “I wonder why this was glued on the door when I came in.”
15) Scribble furiously on a notepad while looking at each passenger. When they try to look, hide the pad.
16) Stare at another passenger for a while, then scream “You’re one of THEM!” and cower to the far corner of the elevator.
17) When the elevator doors close, bang on them, screaming let me out!
18) When there’s only one other person on the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and pretend it wasn’t you.
19) When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
20) When the elevator doors close, announce to the others, “It’s okay! Don’t panic, they’ll open again.”