Evil Kittens Unite
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Joined 05-03-08, id: 610369, Profile Updated: 06-26-10
Author has written 12 stories for Humor, Romance, General, Mythology, and Fantasy.


Below, you will find the stories that I have written and posted. They are all meant to be funny in their own way. They are probably not funny, but they are meant to be. Honestly.

And, for fun, I plan to just review stories that I enjoy. Hopefully any reviews I leave are helpful and aren't too mean (although I do so enjoy being mean).

Below is a list of my stories:

Why My Memory isn't Perfect and Other Lies- based on a conversation my mom and I had. We're very funny people (Strange funny, not ha ha funny). The conversation started when I said, "Mom, would you still love me if I took over the world?" and she replied, "That would depend. Would I get a break on my taxes?" I told her she would, but I was kinda lying. I mean taking over the world and trying to build an utopia, it takes money, ya know?

Driven Insane and Otherwise- This is based on my own experiences learning how to drive. Except, unlike Jazz, I still can't pass my driver's test.

One Perfect Rose- Unfortunately not inspired my real events. I have never fell down a set of stairs and if I did, there'd probably be no one there to catch me. Such is life.

Forever and For Always- It's fun to stalk. Not so much being stalked. Ask anyone.

The Mystery of the Missing Fashion Sense- Originally a one-shot, but I extended because I really liked the main character, Kate. She's kinda self-absorbed and can be unintentionally mean, but she's actually a really nice person who really wants to help others out. As long as it doesn't involve anything too strenuous and a shopping trip can be fit in there as well, that is.

I think that creating this story is the most fun that I have ever had writing.

The Last Walk Home- Probably the most true, actually. The people where I live are crazy talented. And sometimes, just plain crazy.

To Hell With That- My Nanowrimo offering. The story is based on Norse mythology- specifically the story regarding Balder's death. This is just the first part- the prologue, actually, but I'm giving the rest of the story some time off. I'm mostly sick at looking at it.

The Vampire Blues- Guess what this is a spoof of. Ten points if you do. ( Answer: Twilight, which even though I'm making fun of it, I did really sort of like it.)

That? I Know For Sure- After an accident leave her in a coma for a month, Noel is just trying to put her life back together. Which isn't easy, especially with this whole amnesia thing- This story is going to be a bit cliché (and I know someone reading this is thinking "A story about amnesia that's cliché? Why I've never heard of such a thing!" and your sarcasm is totally warranted.) Hopefully the story's a bit interesting seeing as how it's a bit different from some of the other things that I've written. Actually, that's a lie. It's not different at all.

Universal Law of Gravitation -This is a rewrite of a story that I had previously posted, and then had taken down. For now it's going to be a one-shot, but it's actually the prologue to a much longer story. I'm doing it this way because I don't want to commit myself to a story that I won't have time to update once school starts again. It's a fantasy story with romance in it (though I'm still undecided of how big a role the romance part is going to play). Surprisingly, not much humor.

Psyched Out- This idea had been rolling around in my head for ages now, and I finally started to write it. This story is giving me a lot of problems for some reason, so I decided to trend slowly. Updates will be sporadic, but I do hope to finish this story eventually.

See Ya.

-Evil Kittens Unite

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The New Year by bacchanalianromance reviews
My boss is looking for his Cinderella, and he hires me to do it. And here's the clincher: I AM CINDERELLA. What the hell do I do now?
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 17 - Words: 46,172 - Reviews: 589 - Favs: 569 - Follows: 725 - Updated: 1/20/2011 - Published: 1/12/2008
Rising Empire by Slightly Obsessive reviews
Inner reflection of the Warrior-King of the Rising Empire as he greets the crowd from the balcony of his palace.
Poetry: Politics - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 329 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/26/2008 - Complete
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The Original Girl Detective
Or how to commit a crime, not get caught, and get revenge all at the same time- but not necessarily in that order.
Fiction: General - Rated: K - English - Mystery/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 471 - Published: 3/20/2011 - Complete
Psyched Out reviews
Macy just wanted to be a doctor. Liam just wanted to act. She kept predicting the future. He kept having to take off his shirt. Now she's a world famous psychic, and he's determined to expose her as a fraud.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 19,200 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 2/20/2011 - Published: 12/31/2009
Universal Law of Gravitation reviews
When Rosaline discovers the secret of her sister's disappearance, she's horrified. She'd do anything for revenge. Even infiltrate the governing council, trust the person who betrayed her sister, and let herself find love with the one person she shouldn't.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,713 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 8/10/2009
That? I Know For Sure reviews
I see his eyes open. "Hey, Noel," he says, his voice languid. I wonder if he thinks it's creepy that I'm watching him sleep."Hey, you," I say. He lifts an arm and puts it around my waist pulling me down on top of him. And I STILL don't know his name.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Mystery - Chapters: 26 - Words: 57,159 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 81 - Updated: 7/9/2009 - Published: 1/7/2009 - Complete
The Vampire Blues reviews
Only a vampire can love you forever, but only if you let it. It's best to stop these things early.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 504 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/12/2008 - Complete
To Hell With That reviews
"Welcome to Hell. I hope you like it here- you'll be staying a really long time." A retelling of the Myth of Balder's death.
Fiction: Mythology - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,933 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 12/8/2008 - Published: 12/5/2008 - Complete
The Mystery of the Missing Fashion Sense reviews
-Fin- The only thing more important than solving crime, is looking good doing it.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 7,311 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 12/1/2008 - Published: 9/20/2008 - Complete
The Last Walk Home reviews
Because behind every door is a choice.
Fiction: General - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 923 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/3/2008 - Complete
Forever and for Always reviews
When love runs away from you,you have to run after it. And catch it. And terrify it enough that it thinks twice about running away again.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 420 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Published: 9/24/2008 - Complete
Driven Insane or Otherwise reviews
Rules of the Road is a bit misleading. It's usually better to think of them as suggestions. Because, a stop sign isn't always a stop sign - even if it's painted bright red with the word "stop" plastered all over it.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 866 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 9/4/2008 - Published: 7/4/2008 - Complete
One Perfect Rose reviews
Sometimes people fall in love more literally then they expect.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 489 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/4/2008 - Complete
Why My Memory Isn't Perfect and Other Lies reviews
Bloodthirsty spiders: Always a guaranteed conversation stopper.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 293 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/10/2008 - Complete