Schyzotypal X
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Joined 05-30-08, id: 614335, Profile Updated: 06-21-12
Author has written 12 stories for Humor, Humor, Family, Love, and Life.

Schizotypal personality disorder, or simply schizotypal disorder, is a personality that is characterized by a need for social isolation, odd behavior and thinking, and often unconventional beliefs.


Me (does anyone actually read these):

I'd like to think that I'd be a relatively average person if I wasn't so completely tactless, unconciously obnoxious, and hellbent on being brutally honest no matter what. I'm a complete nerd, when I'm not doing school work I'm probably reading a manga, watching an anime, dorking out on fanfiction, playing a video-game, or doing anything but get an actual life that extends farther than the walls of my bedroom. I know that I'm beyond help because my vision has begun to superimpose the Facebook pictures of my friends over their actual faces. I'm really sarcastic and a bit of a dick most of the time and I like to act, make people laugh, and spot the hilarity in everything at everyone's expense (including myself).

Writer Shpeel: I'm a nerdy white kid with superficial problems and a chillosophic view on life. I don't like drama (unless it's the mellow kind) and I don't like vapidity. What I do like are good stories, clever situations, interesting premises, and either hilarious or artfully crafted writing. I write with little to no feelings of pride for my own work but a respect for the craft itself. I do like to hear feedback and it's nice that some people actually enjoy my stories, which is why I post on fanfiction and AO3. Most of my work is purely superficial and I don't intend to stray away from that too much. If you like it, read it, review it, whatever, if you don't, that's fine too, just don't go flaming up a storm kay?


Links

To all you people out there who like, epic stuff and prequels that riddle their sequels with many the continuity error, read the works of my long time companda Legendary Kitty...of death!


My Fiction:

Story's: whatever idea that pops into my head that can be arranged into an okay story that is readable on paper.

Updates: I write impulsively so my updates are sporadic. School also plays a huge roll in kicking my ass and eating my time. Expect long hiatus's, sudden multi-updates and drabbles. Be assured I will finish everything I write...eventually.

Comments and Reviews: Every comment is a good comment as long as it's not a bad one.

Favorites: I like them enough to share with people, if you don't like it don't read it.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Hiring a Hooligan by Deena reviews
Determined to put the fear of God into the racist homophobe who messed up her best friend, mild-mannered Jane Hazelton resorts to hiring a thug to do the job. Trouble is, said thug isn’t interested in money, he’s interested in her. **COMPLETED**
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 110,036 - Reviews: 2291 - Favs: 3,206 - Follows: 704 - Updated: 8/23/2013 - Published: 9/3/2005 - Complete
Quinntessential by the milk bottle reviews
SLASH. Elliot's pretty sure his temperamental flat mate, Quinn, has a problem with him. But since he likes to call himself a pacifist, he'd rather watch MythBusters than find out why.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 98,094 - Reviews: 3030 - Favs: 1,472 - Follows: 1,704 - Updated: 8/28/2011 - Published: 5/10/2008
My Meaningless Existence at a Frozen Yogurt Shop by the milk bottle reviews
ONE-SHOT. It was on that day that I began my downward spiral of meaningless sex, alcoholism, violence, and… okay, not really. But it felt close to something like that.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,083 - Reviews: 217 - Favs: 629 - Follows: 38 - Published: 2/21/2010 - Complete
Without a Noumenon by Chasmodai Blue reviews
Slash// Teagan is a punk content to fall in love, be ridiculous, and change the world. Winter just wants to escape the Eastern Seaboard, but he wouldn't mind coming along for the ride.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 22 - Words: 43,255 - Reviews: 186 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 9/15/2009 - Published: 1/1/2009 - Complete
inspired by sin by doozie reviews
This is a dark, dark one-shot in memory of Jang Ja-Yeon & countless other hopeful actresses who took their lives too early. There is CUSSING, and very MATURE content up ahead.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 781 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/12/2009 - Complete
Is it Genetic? by sarcasticism reviews
A rich, dysfunctional family group of people bound by shared chromosomes meet up again after a lengthy seperation for a reunion. Prepare for a blood bath.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,184 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/25/2009 - Published: 7/17/2009
Luciology by skankasaurus reviews
“Um, hello,” I said weakly, and I didn't fail to notice the way he was alternating his stares between me and the fish. “It's nice to meet you.” “...Were you just talking to your fish?”
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 40,137 - Reviews: 474 - Favs: 438 - Follows: 496 - Updated: 7/1/2009 - Published: 11/22/2007
Wikipedia by OspreyEagle reviews
An acrostic about Wikipedia.
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 19 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 5/25/2009 - Complete
water bubbler mayhem by gg. lass reviews
i spent my double block in the bathroom listening to you drink in the hall while you waited to talk to me.
Poetry: Love - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 14 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/10/2009 - Complete
moonbeams under my fingernails by gg. lass reviews
it would have been six months today.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 197 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Published: 3/22/2009 - Complete
Wolf Bane by justagirlx3 reviews
I was riding in my dad's car and i looked up at the moon and thought wow it looks like its sneering or something and then this poped into my head and i had to type it on my phone so I wouldn't forget.
Poetry: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 54 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Published: 1/26/2009 - Complete
I Pity by i'm not dead yet reviews
All the things that make me feel pity.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 395 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/28/2008 - Complete
Just For You by OstentatiousEloquence reviews
Ever since her boyfriend died, she's retreated further and further into herself. Now all that's left of her is this journal, and it's just for him.
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,026 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 11/6/2008 - Published: 11/1/2008
The Day I Stalked Him by Vena Cava reviews
(One-Shot) 12:05pm. Target caught masturbating in bathroom stall. 007 status: in adjacent stall, hyperventilating.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,796 - Reviews: 968 - Favs: 2,196 - Follows: 175 - Published: 8/9/2008 - Complete
Five Afflictions of Online Fiction Writers by Mockingbyrd's Tune reviews
There are multiple epidemics among us. Make sure you are not infected!
Fiction: Humor - Rated: K - English - Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,998 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 5/19/2008 - Published: 4/29/2008 - Complete
Corner Perspective by Ann Osbourne reviews
Lane, a young street artist, endulges in creating personas of people she watches pass her stand on the New York City street corners. But she isn't the only one watching...
Fiction: General - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 700 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 11/29/2007 - Complete
Hanging by pixy-dizzy reviews
[Rated for language, Short story] She's a typical bleeding heart, so when a suicidally depressed, foulmouthed, unpleasant mancreature shows up at her doorstep for shelter, it isn't like she has much choice but to take him in. Written entirely in dialogue
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,107 - Reviews: 187 - Favs: 275 - Follows: 14 - Published: 3/4/2006 - Complete
College Material by Shampoo Suicide reviews
Your failure to provide complete, accurate, and truthful information on this application will be grounds to deny or withdraw your admission. A college application that is more truthful that it should be.
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,442 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/27/2005 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The WTF Journal of Thalia Evans reviews
When life gives you crap, go a little too crazy, make a complete fool of yourself, then write it all down and slap it up on fictionpress…-a parody of life itself-
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 215 - Words: 55,858 - Reviews: 529 - Favs: 170 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 9/7/2012 - Published: 10/13/2008
The Princess and the Ass reviews
A Sexy Tale of Intrigue, Forbidden Love, and Mystique: Once there was a beautiful princess who fell in love with a donkey, and once there was a servant who believed her charge to be the biggest imbecile she had ever met.-creative writing assignment-
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,479 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 5/27/2010 - Complete
The Night Starts Here reviews
You KNOW something is wrong the moment she ninja rolls into your lawn out of the side door of a moving pizza delivery van. "I'm not who you think I am." "Really Ginger? Your name isn't Corinthia Jasminite Ramirezio? I never would have guessed!"
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,954 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/22/2009 - Complete
The Morning After reviews
The rather rancid breath of some homeless guy is not the best thing to wake up to on the greatest of mornings. It is, however, at its worst when you're hungover without much of a recollection of anything that happened last night.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,120 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 12/19/2009 - Complete
The Alphabet Game reviews
A is for apple tree, B is for backyard, C is for classroom...they've done it just about everywhere now...
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Romance/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,230 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/18/2009 - Complete
For The Ridiculously Overrated reviews
In which there is a car, a pair of "Tickle Me Emo" panties, a vampire who works nights at 7-11 and a Slurppy addicted girl who ridicules him horribly for it.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Romance/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,502 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/23/2009 - Complete
Amarantos reviews
when thy lives on only in heaven's hearsay..."
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 126 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 6/1/2009 - Complete
After the Present reviews
They're empty now...
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 207 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 3/1/2009 - Complete
The End reviews
To live and die for something that is but a hazy concept in our minds. There must be a reason...
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 254 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 2/16/2009 - Complete
Black and Blue reviews
The color of bruises and sins and us...
Poetry: Love - Rated: T - English - Angst/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 274 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Complete
Chinatown reviews
I wonder what she's so worried about, I'm not going anywhere, not yet...
Poetry: Family - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 174 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/7/2008 - Complete
Pathetic reviews
Life... it sucks.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 36 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Published: 6/1/2008