auburn-haired-sadist-XD
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Joined 09-19-08, id: 631550, Profile Updated: 07-17-09
Author has written 14 stories for Humor, Sci-Fi, Life, General, Humor, Fantasy, Love, Song, and Essay.

Hello! My name is Jordan! And before any of you can ask, yes; Jordan can be a female name, too! (rolls eyes)

Anyways!

I really like vampires, so I'll probably be reading mostly vampiric stories. But I do look at other stuff occasionally. XD


Name: Jordan

Gender: Female

Age: I am 15, going on 16, fellas'll get in line...;-)

Hair Color: Auburn XD But only in the sun, really. Othersie, it just looks like boring brown. :-P Bleh!

Favorite Colors: Black, Red, White, Blue, and Green

Books: The Twilight Series, The Harry Potter Series, The Good Earth, Animal Farm, The Host, Blood and Chocolate, Freaks, The Uglies Trilogy, I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings, Things Not Seen, The Artemis Fowl Series, The Maximum Ride Series, Diary of a Wimpy Kid, A Thousand Splendid Suns, and many, many more!


You know you live in 2007 when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did


There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE that it's weird. If you agree but you've done this, too, copy this and put it in your profile.

"I'm bringing sexy back..." Copy and paste this into your profile if you never even knew sexy was gone.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show)/played a game so many times that you can quote it word for word, and you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile.

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Dragon Tales by xandrie reviews
An entirely implausible fairy tale about the wonderful gay love between a dragon and magician.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 13,033 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 11 - Published: 12/29/2010 - Complete
Megatopia by Da Muffity reviews
Episode 4 reaches its HIGHLY ANTICIPATED CONCLUSION.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 12 - Words: 24,217 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 9/26/2010 - Published: 4/7/2010
Trick DRAFT by S. Alexander reviews
REMOVED - READ TRICK REVISED.
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 498 - Reviews: 1079 - Favs: 681 - Follows: 294 - Updated: 7/20/2010 - Published: 6/23/2006 - Complete
Hey Diddle, Diddle by gotmilk8 reviews
Just a short story I wrote for my Creative Writing class. Based on the old nursery rhyme 'Hey Diddle, Diddle.' Enjoy!
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,820 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/10/2009 - Complete
Winging It by AikEav reviews
MxM. Oneshot: Lewis has wings. He is not an angel. Nonai has horns. He is a demon. Demon with an agenda and hot non-angel boy equals sex. Duh. Warnings: Lemon, PWP.
Fiction: Supernatural - Rated: M - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,264 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 6 - Published: 5/20/2009 - Complete
Dinner Date with a Vampire by Nausikaa reviews
Because you never know what sort of strange non human could answer your personal ad.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,587 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/2/2009 - Complete
Still Smiling by gotmilk8 reviews
One Shot, First person story. "I want you, pretty girl." This sentence puts me into a panic. Yet a part of me is saying, Really? Me? Wow, I'm flattered. Flattered that the first male to show any attraction towards me actually wants to rape me.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: M - English - Horror/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,519 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Published: 3/19/2009 - Complete
Vampire's Kiss by Voracious Lust reviews
A short, one chapter story, I suppose you could say. A young woman comes in contact with a very handsome vampire and experiences a death she thought would be frightening.
Fiction: Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,419 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/4/2007 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

I Am An Agnostic reviews
Memoir of an Agnostic...... Covers my views on Christianity and my hope for religious acceptance.
Fiction: Essay - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,114 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/11/2010 - Complete
You Don't Know Me, And You Don't Wear My Chains reviews
A short song that I've been working on. Rated T for excessive use of the word "hell." XD
Poetry: Song - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 292 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/2/2009 - Complete
A Valentine's Poem
A Valentine's Day poem that I wrote last year.
Poetry: Love - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 142 - Favs: 1 - Published: 2/7/2009
This Just CAN'T Be Real reviews
A humorous vampire poem that I wrote. An unnamed narrator reflects on how obvious it was that their boyfriend was a vampire. Meant to be funny, people. ;- Also, one curse word. You have been warned. XD
Poetry: Fantasy - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 518 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/8/2009 - Complete
Patience reviews
A very short poem I wrote after feeling slightly frustrated from spending a day with only males. ;-
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 164 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/4/2009 - Complete
My Fury's At A Lull
A poem I wrote describing my feelings when my trust was betrayed by a close friend. It actually turned out to be quite a nice little poem, though. At least, I think so. I hope other people enjoy it!
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 92 - Published: 1/4/2009 - Complete
The F Word
An ode to the F-word. XD Rated for excessive cursing; other than that, it's actually quite innocent!
Poetry: General - Rated: M - English - Humor/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 171 - Published: 1/4/2009 - Complete
Demon Wings
A short fantasy poem that I wrote a few years ago.
Poetry: Fantasy - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 111 - Published: 11/9/2008 - Complete
I Love My Friends XD Mwahahaha!
A poem about my friends and my relationship with them. Putting new meaning to the phrase "tough love." -evil laughter-
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 266 - Published: 10/5/2008 - Complete
Blood Rush reviews
A short poem about the blood in our veins. Not for the very easily squeamish!
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 83 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 9/27/2008 - Complete
Bare
A poem I wrote for a writing class. The topic we could expand from was "skin." I decided to go with "no skin." A bit creepy, and rather short.
Poetry: General - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 56 - Published: 9/27/2008 - Complete
Does That Mean I Cannot Love?
A poem I wrote when I was in a sad mood. Inspired by things that happened at school which are what depressed me. XD I hope you all like it!
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 181 - Published: 9/27/2008 - Complete
That
Everyone knew about "that," but no one was really sure what it was. Not that they had much of a choice. Sci-fi, Mystery, And A Little Bit Of Horror, Depending On How You Look At It
Fiction: Sci-Fi - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,440 - Published: 9/23/2008 - Complete
Stranded On An Island! Oh, The Horror! reviews
A story that I had to write for English class. A girl awakens to find herself on a mysterious island, and reacts instinctively to survive... XD Humor, of course.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,141 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/23/2008 - Complete