Author has written 1 story for Romance.
Alloh. I'm The Vacant Arbitrator, but you can call me Wallflower. I'm of the female persuasion and have wanted to be a writer since I was in first grade. But enough about me, who wants to hear about me? This is all about my writing capabilities ;D
Quotes (OH, YAY! I love quotes, lub them XD):
"I'm a hypoallergenic worm!" --My Friend, Magzoroni
"If dad poured syrup on himself, he'd be like a burnt waffel." --my little sister
"This is about as great as getting all your hair pulled out at once." --Me :D (can't you see how cheerful I am XD)
"Ninety percent of all polotics is finding someone to blame." --quote form english class
"High skips make dem guyz look fruity."-- Me, watching guys skipping in gym class O.o
"I not only want to rain on your parade, I want to blow up all the floats."--not sure
"If you mess up, don't worry about it. That's what little siblings are for. Unless you're an onyl shild, cuzz then your screwed."-- Me, again
"Touch this blanket and I'm snipping your ankles off with these scissors."-- Me, when guys were abotu to step on the blanket I was making.
"It squeezes all the blood to my heart." --Alex Fletcher from "Music and Lyrics"
"Purples pretty!" --George from "Sydney White"
"Pandas rule the world when the government isn't looking." -- my little sister, again X3
OMigosh!! This is freakin awesome-- found it on a profile X3
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (I was hoping it was going 2 be frozen... darn.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because??...)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash!!...)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and put this on your profile to bring a smile to someone (maybe even a chuckle)...