The Vacant Arbitrator
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Joined 05-23-09, id: 670045, Profile Updated: 05-25-09
Author has written 1 story for Romance.

Alloh. I'm The Vacant Arbitrator, but you can call me Wallflower. I'm of the female persuasion and have wanted to be a writer since I was in first grade. But enough about me, who wants to hear about me? This is all about my writing capabilities ;D

Quotes (OH, YAY! I love quotes, lub them XD):

"I'm a hypoallergenic worm!" --My Friend, Magzoroni

"If dad poured syrup on himself, he'd be like a burnt waffel." --my little sister

"This is about as great as getting all your hair pulled out at once." --Me :D (can't you see how cheerful I am XD)

"Ninety percent of all polotics is finding someone to blame." --quote form english class

"High skips make dem guyz look fruity."-- Me, watching guys skipping in gym class O.o

"I not only want to rain on your parade, I want to blow up all the floats."--not sure

"If you mess up, don't worry about it. That's what little siblings are for. Unless you're an onyl shild, cuzz then your screwed."-- Me, again

"Touch this blanket and I'm snipping your ankles off with these scissors."-- Me, when guys were abotu to step on the blanket I was making.

"It squeezes all the blood to my heart." --Alex Fletcher from "Music and Lyrics"

"Purples pretty!" --George from "Sydney White"

"Pandas rule the world when the government isn't looking." -- my little sister, again X3

OMigosh!! This is freakin awesome-- found it on a profile X3

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (I was hoping it was going 2 be frozen... darn.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because??...)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash!!...)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and put this on your profile to bring a smile to someone (maybe even a chuckle)...

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Everything was normal. Kay was normal, her friend was normal. But that shadow lurking around her house every night? That was abnormal.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Suspense - Chapters: 5 - Words: 15,190 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 7/6/2009 - Published: 5/25/2009