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Joined 08-11-09, id: 683794, Profile Updated: 07-08-12
Author has written 2 stories for Humor, and Romance.


I'm eighteen. I like pie.

My current goals are to make it through my first year at University without dying, and to finally finish a story. I'm really not too sure how either of those are going to work out. Or which one is going to come first. The chicken or the egg? That isn't really applicable to this situation... (Side note: Thanks to Camp NaNoWriMo in June, I was able to finally finish a proper story.)

I love British sci-fi shows, and am obsessed with watching re-runs of Dr. Who. I love manga probably more than what's healthy, so don't mention it to me unless you're ready for an in-depth discussion. Well, if I know what manga you're actually talking about. Hah. I play video games occasionally. Though they're normally just ones that I steal off my brother for a while. Zelda's pretty cool. Twilight annoys me. Edward needs to be introduced to a good barber. I'm thinking of a guy named Sweeny Todd. Yes? No?

I quote things constantly, and love being able to make obscure culture references that people can't work out without Google-ing them. Is that a word? Google-ing? It'd be a verb, right?

I can never keep goldfish alive for more than a few weeks. Which is why I have an invisible one. His name is Pegasus. I know almost all the lyrics to pretty much every Boys Like Girls song, followed closely by songs by the All American Rejects. I don't like putting jam on toast because I normally end up putting on too much and then it makes my teeth hurt. Black is the main colour in my wardrobe, I love funny romance stories, and I'm a non-conformer.

I enjoy reading, though the time to do so has been growing shorter as I grow older. Horror gives me nightmares and drama makes me cry. Laughter has been my best friend and favourite solitude my entire life. And now my bio sounds like a poem. Completely unintentional, for the record.

I'm completely insane and talk too much, mostly saying things that even I don't understand. Try not to take anything I say too seriously because I hardly ever mean any of it. Well, sometimes.

Uhm. Re-reading that, I don't actually know how any of that is actually important, so I'll just say some random words that together will hopefully make this somewhat interesting.

Alligator. Waffle. Swedish. Missile. Bunny slippers.

You're welcome.

People of the Universe (and FictionPress), I have something to say to you. What is wrong with the world that it has now become acceptable for Dwayne Johnson to play an African-American on the new G.I. Joe movie? That wasn't actually what I wanted to say. It just kind of popped out. Like an unplanned birth. Anyways, some of you might already know this from my Teenage Internet Troller chapter, but I'm not going to be able to get on here that often anymore. Sadface. Basically what it comes down to is my sudden lack of free time that comes along with my first year at University. I promise I'll try to update as much as possible, and I'll always love and/or respond to your comments/reviews/questions. Because YOU are the only one who can prevent forest fires.

[June 1st, 2012] Oh, yeah. I do still have one of these, don't I? Wow. Time flies, huh? I'm already half-way through the year at Uni and I still haven't failed anything yet. Will the wonders never cease? I just thought I'd come by and tell y'all that I'm still alive. Partly because I haven't been on here in a while, but mostly because I really should be studying for exams and I'm procrastinating. Well done, Seamir. Well done. Another thing! I'm doing Camp NaNoWriMo at the moment (it just started today), so if you want to cruise on over there and find me I'm under the same name. Drop me a message and we can have a chatsies about how we're going to fail at finishing our novels. Good times.

[July 4th, 2012] This is going to turn into a blog. So, once again, Seamir finds herself stumbling across her FictionPress page and realizing that she still has one. Anyways, you know how I was planning on doing Camp NaNoWriMo? Well, I actually finished it. Like, finished a story. Legit. For cereal. At 70 thousand and something words, it's literally the longest thing I've ever written in my whole life. I was actually thinking about posting it up here soon, so PM me and let me know if you'd actually be interested in me doing something like that. On top of that, I'm planning on jumping head-first into both the August Camp as well as the proper NaNoWriMo event in November. Like I said, go find me on there if you'd like to talk about how badly we're going to do or basically anything else. I'm under the same name.

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Love's Back Pocket by Lady Femme Fatale reviews
Holly Dunn didn't know that when she began studying at a concert, the band's lead singer would call her out on it. Robert Stark didn't know how intrigued he'd be by her odd sort of ways, which is probably why he invited her to go on tour with him. *First chapter only posted. Ebook coming June 30! (Thank you, Guest reviewer. I apologize for not realizing your perspective.)
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,827 - Reviews: 647 - Favs: 434 - Follows: 215 - Updated: 5/17/2015 - Published: 4/13/2009 - Complete
Beautiful Disaster by Lady Femme Fatale reviews
Izzy was trying to seduce her boyfriend, not the guy who had mysteriously ended up in her apartment claiming to be a pirate from the eighteenth century. Could the night get any worse?
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 76 - Reviews: 529 - Favs: 308 - Follows: 142 - Updated: 4/29/2015 - Published: 4/11/2009 - Complete
Along For The Ride by Trade Winds reviews
Nobody speaks to people on trains. It's about the eye contact. Avert and avoid. And I am, I swear. Except there's this guy. This guy who's breaking the rules. Because he's looking, and he's looking at me. [OneShot]
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,132 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/22/2014 - Complete
The WTF Journal of Thalia Evans by Schyzotypal X reviews
When life gives you crap, go a little too crazy, make a complete fool of yourself, then write it all down and slap it up on fictionpress…-a parody of life itself-
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 215 - Words: 55,858 - Reviews: 602 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 104 - Updated: 9/7/2012 - Published: 10/13/2008
Battle Scars by White Rose Blossom reviews
“So I take it I’m not getting any tonight?” That WOULD be the first thing he says to me when he finds out we're locked in a room together. So even with "No" for an answer, how is it I find myself in bed with him, falling harder with every passing second?
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,570 - Reviews: 285 - Favs: 1,313 - Follows: 95 - Published: 7/5/2009 - Complete
Branded by Ravina reviews
ONE-SHOT! “You’ve been branded, my dear.” I jolted at the sound of his voice so close to my ear. Thierry was leaning over me from behind, his chin grazing my right shoulder. “Should I take away your white-out?”
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,393 - Reviews: 102 - Favs: 451 - Follows: 34 - Published: 4/23/2009 - Complete
Awkward Penguins by Sakurelle reviews
“That’s what boyfriends are for, right?” the lady asked suggestively, looking between the guy I like - though we’re just friends - Axel, and me. And all the penguins in the world couldn’t have prepared me for his answer: “Well, am I?” Oneshot.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,991 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 196 - Follows: 19 - Published: 3/16/2009 - Complete
Don't Text and Drive by Sakurelle reviews
Life Lesson 1. Given: There is an inverse relationship between the hotness of a guy and my intelligence level. Find: The reason why I hopped into a hot stranger’s truck as soon as he asked. Solution: His hotness a.k.a. my stupidity. Oneshot.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,584 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 20 - Published: 2/14/2009 - Complete
Pwned by its.Nothing.Special reviews
So maybe my best friend chose his girlfriend over me, and maybe he only remembered my birthday a week after it had passed. The scrap of paper on my locker said: "I R SORRY." How could I stay mad at a boy who apologized like that? Oneshot.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,578 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 401 - Follows: 25 - Published: 7/9/2008 - Complete
The Shed by EruptingFender9 reviews
My best friend and I were standing in front of the shed the first day we got it. The areas around our mouths were stained from our self congratulatory popsicles. My favorite part of the snapshot was that our hands were connected between us.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,035 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 5/6/2008 - Published: 4/26/2008 - Complete
More Than Meets The Ears by EruptingFender9 reviews
I never, in a million years, would have guessed that Hunter Ashen was interested in playing drums for our band. The guy wasn’t mean, necessarily. But the quiet, rocker type boy had everyone in our school intimidated.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 10,387 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 167 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 3/20/2008 - Published: 2/10/2008 - Complete
Boys Suck by EruptingFender9 reviews
"Would you like anything written on the cake? You know... Happy Birthday, Congratulations so and so?" He asked. "Yeah," I responded. "Do you think you could write something along the lines of 'Boys Suck?"
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,642 - Reviews: 205 - Favs: 569 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 1/27/2008 - Published: 1/23/2008 - Complete
Emery & Me by In.the.Wardrobe reviews
He looked towards my waist before groaning and looking away. “Look what you’re wearing.” Confused, I glanced down, and immediately realised the dilemma. I was in my underwear. “Oh.” [COMPLETE]
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 75,512 - Reviews: 1354 - Favs: 2,232 - Follows: 550 - Updated: 12/24/2007 - Published: 5/27/2007 - Complete
Eulogies and Post It Notes Can Change the World! by Imaginary Parachute reviews
[VERY LONG ONE SHOT] Abe Pruitt is going to improve the world, and she's doing it with sticky notes. Jack St. James is going to keep on being bothersome, and he looks good doing it, damn him. Doesn't it suck when the tables are turned? [EDITED]
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 13,743 - Reviews: 362 - Favs: 1,276 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 6/29/2007 - Published: 6/5/2007 - Complete
Letters from a toothpick fiend by Plinky reviews
Sophia, 17, mad as a demented bucket, writes a bunch of thoughts and sends them to a random address, because ... well, just because. What happens, though, when someone writes back? And who's the hot new guy at school?
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 86,688 - Reviews: 1532 - Favs: 458 - Follows: 163 - Updated: 8/25/2006 - Published: 11/7/2005
My Life In One Sentence by invisible.writer reviews
My life was mindnumbingly dull, but I was fine with being the invisible Ginger Ale Girl. Whoever said friends were good for the soul did not know the boy with blue hair.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 113,764 - Reviews: 409 - Favs: 626 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 12/29/2005 - Published: 3/17/2004 - Complete
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Diary of a Teenage Internet Troller reviews
Tips on surviving the interwebs, from someone who's been there.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 35 - Words: 2,446 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 2/6/2012 - Published: 11/17/2011
In Which A Shirt Comes In Handy reviews
Misadventures in a Crazy Person's Life - When my best friend said she wanted to get over her recent heartbreak, I was fully prepared to sit with her in a bar. However, punching her ex in the face and then meeting his cousin hadn't really fit into my plan.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,619 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 5 - Published: 1/2/2012 - Complete