Slaaty
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Joined 10-30-09, id: 695629, Profile Updated: 08-04-13
Author has written 13 stories for General, Young Adult, Humor, Essay, Romance, Love, and Life.

Vocabulary makes me smile;

Oh katzenjammer, leave me alone. My coccyx aches like a sweet tooth and observing the avifauna is my only cure.

He is a zajebiste, niffy twat, but I'd like to pour him into a carafe and keep him forever and ever.


Slaaty who?

She is of the moody, angsty species of teenagerus. In her natural habitat, she can be found sleeping, eating, or riding wild mood swings. Her net spontaneity amounts to the grand total of 0. She lives a very spontaneous life, you see.

She is looking for a playmate to share jokes, insults, philosophical ideas, and crappy pick-up lines with. She is a rather advanced species, so she will and can respond to private messages.

She finds talking in third person amusing, and she has been watching too many nature documentaries. She's going to get some coffee and go to sleep.

Slaaty signed out.


cold x sleepy x identity x help x learn

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Penny Candy by Jaydee Faire reviews
In a down and dirty city where a good time is just a few dollars away, a dancer who's looking for life and a whore who's already given it up come to an arrangement with only one rule: No Love Allowed. Rated M for homosexual intercourse, graphic scenes.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 49 - Words: 124,156 - Reviews: 579 - Favs: 424 - Follows: 437 - Updated: 5/9/2013 - Published: 11/15/2007
Cycle by fatbird33 reviews
a war social commentary
Poetry: War - Rated: T - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 300 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/8/2010 - Complete
Miss Vibraphone's Winery by Dashboard Dusk reviews
If you keep trying to run you'll bruise the fruit, dear.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 234 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/5/2010 - Complete
artemis et actaeon by Lux d'Marcs reviews
i was spied spying
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 142 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/23/2010
The Art of Imploding by Icarus-Rising reviews
"When I look at you it hurts to breathe. It hurts right here..." Alexander pointed to his chest. "...and this will make it stop." m/m, f/m
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 13 - Words: 38,085 - Reviews: 199 - Favs: 215 - Follows: 230 - Updated: 6/16/2010 - Published: 8/16/2006
Chasing Mr Darcy by Vena Cava reviews
(One-Shot) Once upon a time, we met. And for me, that was happily ever after.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,699 - Reviews: 268 - Favs: 662 - Follows: 33 - Published: 5/24/2010 - Complete
Sitting, Waiting, Wishing by Vaudeville reviews
He's a millionaire playboy. She's a girl who's just trying to get by. They were best friends growing up but five years can really change a person.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 92,452 - Reviews: 944 - Favs: 1,091 - Follows: 457 - Updated: 1/11/2010 - Published: 9/11/2008 - Complete
Beauty Is by Panda Pandaka reviews
Why?" "Because...I want to be beautiful." Or so she thinks.
Fiction: General - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 418 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/14/2009 - Complete
Vandrophobia by SammyLi reviews
COMPLETE. I have an odd fear. I fear beautiful men. Luckily there aren't many in the world, but when my class receives a transfer student who is a completely beautiful boy and is assigned to sit next to me...I just might crack.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 68,628 - Reviews: 720 - Favs: 686 - Follows: 237 - Updated: 5/14/2009 - Published: 1/10/2008 - Complete
Smooth Move by DancingChaChaFruit reviews
.FIN. I was starting to think he was my bad luck charm. After all, it was no coincidence that I embarrassed myself every time I saw him. Just throw in bookstores, sisters, best friends, blind dates, and dentists, and you’ve got my newly complicated life.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 123,225 - Reviews: 1395 - Favs: 1,346 - Follows: 333 - Updated: 8/10/2007 - Published: 2/25/2007 - Complete
Scene One: The Curtain Call by Porn Yesterday reviews
The show must go on.
Fiction: Play - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 889 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 2/5/2006 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Box of Rainbows reviews
Together we fly through our colouring book, filling in the blanks with shades of our eccentricity.
Fiction: General - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 202 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/21/2010
Hindsight reviews
It's funny how we always think of the right words to say two days later. //Quick note: chapters are not related - hop in and gather what you may.//
Fiction: General - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 765 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 12/20/2010 - Published: 10/21/2010
Struggle reviews
I hear your name, I enter a stupor.
Poetry: Love - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 61 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/18/2010
Chant reviews
I wish I could take this paint brush of Nakir and colour you between the lines.
Poetry: Life - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 213 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/5/2010
Hold My Breath reviews
Dear mirror, I’m perfect today, but pizzas on a Wednesday afternoon ruin the beauty.
Poetry: Love - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 231 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/5/2010
Five More Minutes reviews
In Progress // "By raising your legs slowly and laying on your back, you cannot sink into quicksand", she continued. Looking up, her breath caught as he replied, "well, by spreading your legs slowly and laying on your back, you can sink into my bed."
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,421 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 7 - Published: 8/17/2010
Of secks and tree stump bashing reviews
A rant/essay on the ups and downs of the popular game "MapleStory". Please note: caustic - if you have not played or heard of the game, you may be disadvantaged reading this.
Fiction: Essay - Rated: T - English - Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 840 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 7/15/2010 - Complete
The Day I Shot Him reviews
ONE-SHOT // I had the entire house to myself for a week: of course I spent it playing my beloved video games. But once I started mock-shooting a strange man outside my window... well, I knew I'd gone a little too far.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,730 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/12/2010 - Complete
What's Santa's Gender? reviews
If you are a French speaker, I would really appreciate if you could proofread my speech. Thank you!
Fiction: General - Rated: K - French - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,027 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 2/14/2010
Hey baby, what's your sine? reviews
Math teacher, meet math student.
Fiction: General - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,374 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/13/2010
xx reviews
Editing...
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 1/30/2010 - Published: 1/3/2010
The Bubble Girl reviews
Please pop me.
Fiction: General - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,362 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 1/24/2010
Your Stranger Etiquette reviews
They tell you not to take candy from a stranger. So what is the deal with Halloween?
Fiction: General - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 541 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/1/2009