Favorite quotes:

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. - Robert Bloch

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. -- Phyllis Diller

"And always remember children; do not blow up any toilets without good reason, and when doing so, make sure your fuse is long, sugar is not your enemy, and that the banana that's been sitting in the corner of your room for the past three years has its own civilization." -- Unknown, but funny

Rock-a-bye human, on a rooftop, when the wind blows, beware the long drop, and if the roof breaks, then watch out below, for here comes a human, roof tiles in tow...

"If I tell someone to jump off a cliff, and someone else says "That's mean!", I'll say "No, that's sympathy.""--Souls-and-Turkey-Cafe's brother

They say, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well, I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

It's always the last place you look. Of course it is. Why the heck would I keep looking after I found it?

I have ADD, Attention Def-OMG! It's a butterfly!

Those that ignore history are doomed to repeat it; those who studied history are doomed to know its repeating.

I use to have super powers, but then my therapists took them away.

An apple a day keeps everyone away, as long as you throw them hard enough.

Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried to slam a revolving door.

Smirk, it makes people wonder what you’re up to, while scaring the crap out of them at the same time!

Sometimes people put up walls not to keep people out but to see who cares enough to tear them down.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

Therapist = The/rapist . . . Scary thought.

Remember what you just said, because tomorrow I am going to have a witty and sarcastic comeback and you'll be devastated then!

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

I'm sarcastic, what's your superpower?

Have you noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anybody driving faster is a maniac?

I can insult my best friend, but heaven help you if you do.

When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown, but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the person who made you mad.

I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking so good either.

I'm sorry, yesterday was the deadline for all complaints.

If at first you DO succeed, try not to look too impressed.

Anger is one letter short of danger.

Excuse me... have you seen my sanity... I think I lost it.

“Suicide is man's way of telling God, 'You can't fire me - I quit!”

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.
Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it.

AND...

...because good things happen too:

I am the guy who came out to the entire school in his senior speech and got a standing ovation for his courage.
I am the girl who kisses her girlfriend on the sidewalk and laughs at those who glare.
We are the couple who planned and studied and got a damn good lawyer and BEAT the state that wanted to take our child away.
We are the ones who took martial arts classes and carry pepper spray and are just too dangerous to gay bash.
I am the transgender person who uses the bathroom that suits me, and demands that any complaining staff explain their complaint to my face in front of the entire restaurant--and shares with my other trans friends which restaurants don't raise a stink.
I am the mother who told her lesbian daughter to invite her girlfriend over for dinner.
I am the father who punished his son for calling you a fag.
I am the preacher who told my congregation that love, not hate, is the definition of a true follower of God.
I am the girl who did not learn the meaning of "homosexual" until high school but never thought to question why two men might be kissing.
I am the woman who argues (quite loudly and vehemently) with the bigots who insist that you do not have the right to marry or raise children.
We are the high school class who agrees, unanimously, along with our teacher, that love should be all that matters. I am the child who was raised going to gay marriages and civil unions, becuase my parents never taught me to hate.

I am making a difference. Hate will not win if we do not let it. If you agree, repost this.

Month one
Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two
Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three
You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four
Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five
You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six
I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven
Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.