Poll: How many VIMHs do you have? Vote Now!
Author has written 17 stories for Humor, Supernatural, Essay, Life, Fantasy, and Sci-Fi.
UPDATE 3/13/13: Hi guys! Or nobody! Whoever happens upon this. I've been really neglectful of this account lately. I'm not dead, but I've been working a lot outside of here, working on a big NaNoWriMo project that just keeps going. I'm really sorry for not writing a lot, but there's life as well that I've been busy with. If anyone at all out there has been/is waiting for an update, I'm really sorry. I'll try to work on my other stories when I can, but I've also been lacking inspiration lately. Feel free to shoot the failure of an author. This account isn't completely dead. I promise. Just thought I'd put this here to update every once in a while. *shrugs* Might as well add to my already giant profile. Why not, right?
Take the short path below or long path a little ways down. Skip it if you want and go on around. But that's where the fun is, you'll miss it if you do!Because, friends, it's the journey...not the destination. ;D
THE SHORT PATH:
THE LONG PATH:
Which one? Which one? Which path shall you choose? There's so many to pick from! (Okay, not MANY, but quite a few as most of them tend to be very long and windy...) All the places in my Wonderland are listed below, take a peek! I won't bite! (...much...:) (Not current...sorry...)
The Nameless Title Series-The Title Of This Story Blew Up; Wanted: A Title For This Story; The Title Of This Story May Contain Radioactivity (If only I could find it...); The Title Of This Story Is On Vacation:
Ms. Mehall's Magical Mishaps: Descrip. How's that for alliteration? It's basically just a spin-off of the Nameless series, about Ms. Mehalls problems with magic, as the title points out. Definitely not my priority. If I feel like writing a chapter, I will, but don't expect anything like regular updates. Just for laughs, hopefully.
The Elf Who Saved Christmas: Just something my friend and I started when we were younger, and I decided to finish. It was actually for a contest (see SRrox01 for details) "Do you believe in magic?" which never had results because we really didn't care. Kid-ish, but cute, I think. Complete.
You Didn't See Anything: My second priority story, basically, and seems to be my first, lately, actually, as this one has inspiration and the other one hasn't. I don't know where I got the idea, but I did and I wrote it down. I usually end up a little nervous about this because I've heard I "can't write in a boy's POV." Luckily, AJ is just so...different (AJ: HEY! Me: Shut it, AJ.) that he can't really be contradicted, though he does have this attitude about him that's kind of hard to get into sometimes. Anyways, in progress.
The Corner Of Complete And Absolute Boredom: Side story. You guys gotta understand this is not a priority because a) I can't MAKE myself bored and b) it has to be random, or I'll make a plot and it'll be pointless then. Totally pointless. Totally for laughs. Totally random. Meet the VIMHs, some friends and their VIMHs, etc. See the title. People seem to enjoy our rantings, maybe you will too. :D
Ps. I know my profile looks really long and scary at the moment (It is...at least a little) but honestly there's some really funny stuff that I sto-Twins: *elbow me*-I mean, borrowed without permission from other people profiles. It's worth at least scrolling through. Also, no. I'm not really as creepy and somewhat rhyme-y as the earlier poem may impose. I appreciate you reading this far. I also tend to love reviews, and favourites, and alerts, and cookies. If you somehow find a way to send a cookie over the internet I will love you forever. Anyways, I'm off subject, I HEREBYE PERMIT YOU TO TAKE ANY STUFF OFF MY PROFILE AS MOST OF IT WAS TAKEN FROM OTHERS' PROFILES IN THE FIRST PLACE! Don't steal my characters without permission (lnik has dibs on Fred the centaur and suckishLEMONADE is used to be stealing hers), PM if you want to talk, I'd love to beta for somebody, no, I'm not telling you my age, if you're annoyed with me spelling colour and favourite like a British person you're going to hate my writing, I love penguins and I can't believe you're still listening to me ramble. GO FORTH AND READ PEOPLE! *points forward toward computer screen as the people around me look at me funny*
Yay for random quotes! (this is a work in progress people):
"He's a weirdo!" -Alexis
"Thanks for the meal." -Kirishima Zen
"Our Beatles are way better than your Rolling Stones!" -Homer Simpson
"And for first time in bird kid history, I was trampled by a crazed camel." -Max, FANG
"No friggin' way Jacob." -Sue Sylvester, Glee
"Though I've been placed with the boys, my loyalty remains with you ladies. Especially since all my artistic and fashion decisions have been turned down." -Kurt, Glee
"I hope it's not, like, body building. I don't want to be really calm and have massive nostrils." -Georgia Nicolson, And Then He Ate My Boy-Entrancers
"I don't know what she had for breakfast, but she has put on about one-hundred-fifty pounds. Either that or her knickers have reached elepantine size." -Georgia Nicoloson, And Then He Ate My Boy-Entrancers
"So...let me get this straight. You drank your dog?" -Caleb James, U93
"'You bet your gol' darn bottom dollar, mister. I've got a gun and I'm not afraid to use it!' He just looked at me as if I was talking complete rubbish or something." -Georgia, And Then He Ate My Boy-Entrancers
"I don't know what was keeping the Ace Gange unless Ellen had had another dither attack and had fallen down in the lavatory." -Georgia.
"I can't see through walls. I'm not that awesome." -me
"Them gazing at me in my coffin, crying...as they tried to force the coffin lide down over my nose! Merde..." -Georgia
"Hamburger-a-go-go land we we come! Get ready for a knicker invasion!" -Georgia
"A bunch of men together calls for some naked socializing!" -Niwa-san
"Our house is so dirty, it broke the vacuum cleaner." -My mom
"'Bloody hell in a hand backet, ouch ouch! Bollocking bugger bugger bum!' 'Are you sure your shoes are okay?' 'Jas, some complete imbecile of gigantic proportions has just trodden on my foot. That is why I am leaping like a loon.'" -Georgia and Jas.
"There is an exception to every rule. There is, however, not an exception to every law. No matter what Scarlet says. Scarlet: There is so, you just gotta think hard enough, and not get caught." -me and Scarlet
"Let's hear it for jibber-jabber! WOOHOO!" -Kowalski
"Though I risk expulsion by saying this, Mr. Shou I urge you to see that once again Britanny has helped one of us be ourselves." -Kurt
"IT'S JUST A MOIST TOWLETTE!" -Kurt
"Oh yes, now I can write a book – Forty-Five Ways To Avoid Sexual Molestation By The Elderly Pervert. Dedicated to Roy Mustang: The Bastard Colonel Who Forced Me To Learn How." -Edward Elric
"...And that's why I'm standing here in a...red shower curtain." -Finn
"EXCLAMATION POINT!" -my brother, Jake
"We have enough meatballs to survive a nuclear haulocaust!" -Mom
"We LOVE football! Well, Blaine loves football. I love scarves." -Kurt
"For your information, I happen to love rabbits. Especially white ones." -Alice, Alice in Wonderland (2010; movie edition) (Read CP Coulter's Dalton and get the whole Alice in Wonderland crossover stuff. :D)
"'...the lyrics left something to be desired.' 'Yeah, and it was a little wrong when they kept sticking their tongues out, I couldn't help imagining them licking stuff!" Kurt and Tina
God made you, then He made me, then He whispered, "Meant To Be..." - Unknown
It's kind of fun to do the impossible. - Walt Disney
Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened. - Dr. Seuss
Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the Ark, professionals built the Titanic. - Unknown.
Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives. - Charles William Dement
A life with love will have some thorns, but a life without love will have no roses. - Unknown
The best things in life are unseen, that's why we close our eyes when we kiss, cry, and dream. - Unknown
I can't believe that God put us on this earth to be ordinary. - Lou Holtz
Keep me as the apple of your eyes, hide me in the shadow of your wings. - Psalms 17:8
Families are like fudge - sweet with a few nuts. - Unknown
You're entirely bonkers. But I'll tell you a secret, all the best people are. - Alice In Wonderland (2010)
Alfalfa: "Could this day get any worse?" -Bullies show up, Alfalfa is already in his underwear - "And the clouds opened up and God said, I hate you, Alfalfa." - The Little Rascals (1994)
"Alec looked away. "What happened to you?" His voice was oddly constricted.
92 percent of American teens would die if Fang told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would tell Fang to get over himself and then shove him back in your basement where he belongs. Then, you would resurrect the 92 percent of overzealous fangirls and use them as your zombie army to take over Canada and rename it Canadia where you would rule as Queen with Fang by your side as your extremely hot king who has no real political power except to stand there and make you look good.
The Stupid Test!
1)Choked on your own spit while you were talking: ...yes...
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
FRIENDS:Have never seen you cry.
FRIENDS: Ask you to write down your number.
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then give it back.
FRIENDS:Only know a few things about you.
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college.
FRIENDS:Will comfort you when the guy rejects you
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Man: Is this seat empty?
Man: Your place or mine?
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Man: Hi, I think we've had a date once or twice?
Man: Will you go out with me Saturday?
Man: I want to kiss you all over.
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Boy: Not Really
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose me, or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain, and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason why you never crosse my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I'll do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
(Note from Alice: I can't decide whether to put this on or not...Eh, I'll just delete the ones that I think are stupid.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?
I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a Cashier hand this little boy some money back.
The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.
The Cashier said, 'I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll.'
Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''
The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''
Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.
The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.
Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.
'It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas.
She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.'
I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry.
But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.'
His eyes were so sad while saying this. 'My Sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''
My heart nearly stopped.
The little boy looked up at me and said: 'I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.'
Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me 'I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me.'
'I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.'
Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.
I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. 'Suppose we check
'OK' he said, 'I hope I do have enough.' I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money.
The little boy said: 'Thank you God for giving me enough money!'
Then he looked at me and added, 'I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!''
'I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''
'My mommy loves white roses.'
A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.
I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started.
I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.
Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.
The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma.
Was this the family of the little boy?
Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away.
I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.
She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.
I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine.
And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you becasue of the effects, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile.
If you've ever had random loud singing outbursts in public, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever tried to hi-five somebody and end up hitting them in the head, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.
Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.
If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile.
92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your arse off.
If you looked at my profile just to find random quotes or stuff to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you like cartoons, video games, and animated movies even though people say you're too old for them and you don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.
Annoying things to do on an elevator: read this! XD Very funny!!
1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag,
2) STAND silent and motionless in the
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look
12) TRY to make personal calls on the
13) DRAW a little square on the floor
14) WHEN there's only one other person
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they
16) ASK if you can push the button for
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.
I don't think blondes are dumb, but this was too funny not to post:
This blonde is driving down an old country road when she spots another blonde in a wheat field rowing a boat.
She pulls over to the side of the road and stops the car. Staring in disbelief, she stands at the side of the road to watch the woman for a while.
When she can't stand it any more, she calls out to the blonde in the field,
The blonde in the field stops rowing and responds, 'Because it is an ocean of wheat.'
The blonde standing at the side of the road is furious. She yells at the blonde in the field,
'It is dumb blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name.'
The blonde in the field just shrugs her shoulders and begins rowing again.
The blonde on the side of the road is beside herself and shakes her fist at the blonde in the field yelling,
16 Things to do when you're in Wal-Mart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
15.Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"
16. When you are at the cash paying, ask: "Can I have fries with that?"
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.
If you think that those stupid kids should just give that poor Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap. If you're part of the 8 percent that hasn't, put this in your profile.
--WEIRD QUIZ THING--
1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 81, and find line 4.
long road, sometimes called Coffee
2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What can you touch?
A sandlewood candle, PS3 controler, notebook
3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
HGTV Design star
4. Without looking, guess what time it is:
5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
5:36 PM Eh well...fail...
6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Like, 2 hours ago. I was getting home from Target.
8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
My cell phone
9. What are you wearing?
City scape shirt, jean shorts (cuz that question isn't stalkerish at all)
10. Did you dream last night?
Not that I remember.
11. When did you last laugh?
12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Fire place, pictures, window, curtains, shelf, etc.
13. Seen anything weird lately?
Is that a rhetorical question?
14. What do you think of this quiz?
It seems kind of stalkerish...
15. What is the last film you saw?
HARRY POTTER! YAYAYAYAY!!!
16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
Um...let's see...A DACHSCHUND! And I could name it Alice! Or maybe Pooky, and also, I would buy some guy to get all the freakin' voices out of my head.
17. Tell me something about you that I don't know:
I play the Clarinet.
18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
19. Do you like to dance?
Hehe...yeah...in front of the bathroom mirror with my earphones in...
20. George Bush:
Just another old guy trying to run the world.
21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Yeah, maybe. I think I'd get to home sick though.
24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
"Admission for one!"
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen, Queen S of Randomness 016, Light Dragon SunsSong, Neassa, Kimiko, Ocean's Nocturne of the COCA, luvablenerd, soraroxas365, Dying-Lunar-Mystery, Alice Rocker
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Ocean's Nocturne of the COCA, luvablenerd, soraroxas365, Dying-Lunar-Mystery, Alice Rocker
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.
I solemly swear that anyone who flames my stories will get a flame back. FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE! BEAT OUT THE FLAMES! If you agree (or hate flamers), copy this into your profile.
If you're easily confussed or confuzzled add this to you're profile.
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.
If you've ever argued with yourself and lost, copy and paste this into your profile.
85 percent of the people who read Harry Potter think Luna Lovegood is crazy. If you are a part of the 15 percent that thinks she rules, copy this into your profile.
15 percent of every high school population is considered "Popular". 20 percent is desperate to become a part of the popular 15 percent. 20 percent couldn't care less. 15 percent realize that popularity doesn't matter. 10 are too busy worrying about their grades to care. 5 percent are goths, 5 percent can speak another language fluently, and 5 percent are too stupid to realize that no one likes them. If you are a part of the 5 percent who think the 'unpopular' 85 percent should rebel against the popular 15 percent, copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Ocean's Nocturne of the COCA, luvablenerd, soraroxas365, Dying-Lunar-Mystery, Alice Rocker
Say the word "cow" before each word:
Now say the word "cow" after each word:
Now read it from the bottom up:
Put that on your profile if you're currently laughing at yourself for falling for that
20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. Don't use any punctuation.
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity .
Post this on your profile to make someone smile!
Repost this if you agree with it.
Four invites three and eight to dinner at their own house. What happens?
Pedro: *looking around awkwardly*
Tori: Yeah…so…great weather we’ve been having, eh?
Pedro: I hate rain.
Virgil: Well, then…
You need to stay at a friend's house for a night. Whose house, One or Six?
Can I pass?
Well, on one side, I’d probably die if I went to Till’s, on the other hand, I don’t want to be stuck with Monica for a whole night…
…I’ll just sleep on the street. *grabs sleepingbag*
Two and Seven are making out when ten walks in. Ten's reaction?
Wrevor: *pulls out video camera* This is so going on YouTube…
Three falls in love with six. Eight is jealous. What happens?
Virgil: I’M SORRY TORI!!!
Four jumps you in a dark alleyway. Who rescues you, two, ten or seven?
Tori: STOP PUTTING ME IN BAD SITUATIONS!!!
Genevieve: Er…nah…*walks off*
Wrevor: …you want to get that?
Jen: …meh. Not really.
Wrevor: Want to get dinner?
Jen: You’re paying.
both of them walk off as Tori tackles me with surprising strength*
One decides to start a cooking show. Fifteen minutes later, what happens?
Terry: *wiping down the kitchen* I thought I told you to turn OFF the mixer before you pulled it out.
Sam: *shrugs apologetically*
Three has to marry Eight, Four, or Nine. Who do they choose?
HEY HEY HEY!!! That’s a dumb question.
Jake: *wipes sweat from brow*
Seven kidnaps Two and demands something from five for Two's release. What is it?
Jen: *holding Genevieve* GIVE ME THE PICTURES!!!
Terry: *holding camera behind back* NEVER! How’d you even GET in that closet?
Twins: *whistling innocently*
Genevieve: *huffs indignantly*
Jen: …why would you want HER back anyway?
Jen: *throws her to the side* I’m going to get Sam or Tori…
Everyone gangs up on three. Does three stand a chance?
Virgil: Come on guys, can’t we all just be friends?
Everyone: *throws cheese puffs at him*
Everyone is invited to two and seven’s wedding except for eight. How does eight react?
Pedro: Whatever…*walks off*
Why is six afraid of seven?
Both of them: *burst out laughing*
Nine arrives late for two and seven’s wedding. What happens and why were they late?
Jake: IT’S NOT MY FAULT!!! THE BUS WAS SLOW!!! TT.TT
It’s okay Jake! Jen poked Genevieve with a spoon halfway through and ran off.
Five and Nine get drunk and end up at your house. What happens?
laughing too hard to speak*
Jake: It just…it just gets so hard and…and…you’re so…you’re so short…
Terry: *giggling* Your hair is blue.
Nine murders Eights best friend (Has to be someone on the list). What does eight do to get back?
I don’t think Pedro HAS a best friend. And if so, it would be Jake…OH NO!
Pedro: WHY? HE WAS THE ONLY ONE I ACTUALLY CARED ABOUT!!!
I NEVER GOT TO HUG HIM!!! TT.TT
Eight and Three go camping. But they forget food. What do they do?
Both of them: *sitting in awkward silence again*
Pedro: I’m leaving now.
Four is in a car crash and is critically injured. What does ten do?
Wrevor: WHY TORI WHY???
Till: *sobbing* WHY NOT???
Both of them: *burst out crying*
The quiz is over. By the way, how did two and seven end up?
Uh…we’ve yet to find Jen after that and I think Genevieve fell off a cliff or something…hopefully…
Things I'm not allowed to do at Hogwarts.
1) Seamus Finnigan is not after “me lucky charms”.
2) I do not weigh the same as a duck. Nor should I try to act like one.
3) "I've heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.
4) I will not sing "we're off to see the wizard" when sent to the Headmaster's office.
5) I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class.
6) I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss.
7) Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda.
8) Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar. Nor may I take him for a walk.
9) First years are not allowed to be fed to Fluffy.
10) I will not make any jokes about Lupin and his "time of the month".
11) I will not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals.
12) I will not sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin quidditch matches.
13) The Giant Squid is not an approriate date to the Yule Ball.
14) When Death-Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout "To the Bat Mobile, Robin!"
15) When a class-mate falls asleep, I shall not take advantage of the fact and draw a Dark Mark on his arm.
16) It's not necessary for me to yell "BURN!" every time Snape takes house points from Gryffindor.
17) Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is simply coincidental.
18) I will not call the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny. Even if he is wearing an orange anorak.
19) I will not refer to the Weasley Twins as "bookends".
20) I will not dress up in a Dementor's suit and use a dustbuster on Harry's lips to make him do what I want.
21) I will not scare the Arithmancy students with my Calculus book.
22) I will not hold my wand in the air before casting spells shouting "I got the power!"
23) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that the Knights who say Ni have challenged him to a duel and then have students yell "Ni!" from various directions.
24) I am not Xena: Warrior Princess and I shall not use war cries to signal my entrance when I enter a classroom.
25) It’s not necessary for me to yell "Bam!" every time I apparate.
26) I will not steal Griffyndor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallway.
27) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music when wandering the halls.
28) "To conquer the earth with flying monkeys" is not an appropriate career choice.
29) I am not allowed to begin Herbology class by singing the theme song to "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes"
30) I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue and call them smurfs.
31) The Whomping Willow is not an Entwife.
32) "Draco Malfoy, Take it up the Arse" is not an acceptable quidditch chant.
34) I am not Allowed to lock Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy in a closet to see what will happen.
34) It is a bad idea to tell Proffesor Mcgonagal that she takes herself too seriously.
35) "Ya'll check this crap out!" is not an appropriate way to announce that I am about to conduct an experimental spell.
36) I will not say the phrase "Dude, get a life" to Voldemort.
37) I will not offer to pose nude for Collin Creevy.
38) I am no longer allowed to use the words "pimp cane" in front of Draco Malfoy.
39) Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I should not start singing anything from The Phantom of the Opera.
40) I will say nothing about the incident in the Great Hall with Ron. Ever.
(And here’s ten more I made up myself just to see what will happen if I took my gang of crazies to Hogwarts.)
41) I will not announce that I am going to Pigfarts when Snape deducts points from Griffyndor for no reason.
42) I will never, ever let Scarlet near a wand. Ever. …again…
43) I will not let Louis anywhere near the prefect’s bathroom as it took them 5 days to clean up the soap mess (with magic) last time.
44) I will not let Todd anywhere near Hermione.
45) Terry is not allowed to ask Cedric's ghost how he came back to life as a vampire in Twilight.
46) Spreading lubricant all over the floor of the main commons is not allowed.
47) Sam is not allowed to ask the house elves how they got so short.
48) I will never ever, ever, ever bring the twins back to Hogwarts. Ever. Because they still can't figure out how they got the sword of Griffyndor stuck in a picture frame.
49) I will not let the twins see the Marauders’ map.
50) AJ is not allowed to run around exorcising all the ghosts, or throwing salt everywhere, and spritzing Draco in the face conviced he is a "evil spirit" come to take over the world.
If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend then copy this to your profile
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you are insane, enjoying every second, and proud of it, copy this and paste it into your profile.
copy and paste this if you like the most annoying songs in the world(hampster dance, Numa Numa song, crazy frog)personally i love these songs but i dodn't know what categorey music they would be.
Too many people have smoked marijuana. If you haven't, put this in your profile.
Too many people are on crack. If you're not, add this to your bio.
If you have ever changed your password on something and forgotten it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you sometimes talk to yourself copy and paste this onto your profile.
Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
Chocolate chip cookies are the best!! If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile!!
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.
If you like to put these types of things in your profile, copy and paste to your profile.
If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile
If you ever forgot how old you are when someone asked you, put this in your pro.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, put this in your pro.
If you ever laughed at a movie that wasnt funny, put this in your pro.
If you love rain, put this into your profile.
If you've ever tripped where there was a 'watch your step' sign, put this in your pro.
I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do.
If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.
If you are insane, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have WAY too much time on your hands and your on fanfiction.net with that time, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've tripped over a twig, copy and paste this into you're profile.
If you think that I think that you think that I think that you think that I am totally spazzing out right now with the 'If you thinks' copy this to your profile already!!
If you think that I'm making you think too much, copy this to your profile.
98 of teenagers do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like chocolate chip cookies.
If you ever mispronounced an easy word (such as the word 'and' or 'the'), put this in your profile
Even when you can’t see Him, GOD is there! if you believe in GOD put this in your profile.
Racism is wrong and can often times destroy people's self confidence. It's a horrible and cruel way to treat people. To prove that we are all alike, try this simple experiment: Hold your hand up to a light of some kind. You'll see a shadow cast nearby. Now, have someone of a different race hold their hand up too. You'll see, essentially, the same image. Five fingers and a palm. Skin color doesn't matter when you get right down to it. If you are against racism, copy this message and my symbol for equality to your profile.
If you wanna travel when you get older, copy this into your profile!
No one's perfect. If you know and like that your not perfect. Copy this to your profile.
.eliforp ruoy otni siht etsap dna ypoc ,sdrawkcab siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fI
If you think Fanfiction.net is way better than Myspace could ever hope to be in eternity, copy and paste and add your name to the list: otherrelmwriter, ChibiSkitty-donna, AquaFlameElementalist, Luvablenerd, soraroxas365, Dying-Lunar-Mystery, Alice Rocker
If you think being normal or the same as everyone else is BORING! Copy and paste this to your Profile and add your name to the list to show that being normal is NOT cool. Dying-Lunar-Mystery, Alice Rocker
If you understand what this 'Purple Butterflies of Mushroom chocolate turtles' means or doesn't mean copy and paste this to your profile. >:)
APT ANAGRAMS (I find this entirely too hilarious NOT to post...)
Dormitory rearranged is Dirty Room
Presbyterian rearranged is Best in Prayer
Astronomer rearranged is Moon Starer
Desperation rearranged is A Rope Ends it
The Eyes rearranged is They See
George Bush rearranged is He Bugs Gore
The Morse Code rearranged is Here Come Dots
Slot Machines rearranged is Cash Lost in 'em
Evangelist rearranged is Evil's Agent
Animosity rearranged is Is No Amity
Election Results rearranged is Lies-Let's Recount
Snooze Alarms rearranged is Alas! No More Z's
A Decimal Point rearranged is I'm a Dot in Place
The Earthquakes rearranged is That Queer Shake
Eleven Plus Two rearranged is Twelve Plus One
Mother-In-Law rearranged is Woman Hitler
Crazy is when you're so obsessed with eating your Jell-o (and you forgot to put a spoon in your lunch box) that you try drinking your Jell-o through a straw and using straw chopsticks because straws were the only untensil-type thing available.
Crazy is when you start dancing in Walmart to its cheesy music.
Crazy is when u laugh uncontrolable at your own jokes.
Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what is so interesting about the eraser.
Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on.
Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself.
Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do.
Crazy is when you laugh when nothing's funny.
Crazy is when you crack up if someone says "Oatmeal!".
Crazy is when you forget what you're saying in the middle of a sentence.
Crazy is when you take the time to write down stuff like this and memorize it.
Crazy is when you memorized every single line of the Kingdom Hearts series.
Crazy is when your so obsessed with Roxas (KH 2) that you bang on the T.V. every now and then to see if he will come out .(Yes this is the real Sam from Storms; Crossover Mania LOL) I LOVE ROXAS!
Crazy is when your are going through this as a checklist.
Crazy is when you quote Charlie the Unicorn at random momments.
Crazy is when you eat twenty pixie sticks in one day.
Crazy is when your crazy.
Crazy is when start talking nonsense everyday during gym.
Crazy is when you convince your friends your 'high' because you can't stop laughing even when nothing is funny. And then all of you convince the nearest adult that you're having a breakdown.
Crazy is when you trip up the stairs, and laugh all the way back down them.
Crazy is when it is last day of school you scream and run around in circles.
Crazy is when you get drunk on air and laugh during the saddest part of the move.
Crazy is when you can call yourself something else, and completely become that person, forgetting your reason for hating the world,
Crazy is when you laugh at nothing during school and laugh when everyone looks at you like your insane.
If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list!
SERIOUSLY! COPY AND PASTE THIS!! PASTE IT I SAY!!
(I bet you never knew, or wanted to know, that i was this crazee.)
(You HAVE to know your crazee when you spell crazee wrong. LOL. =)> )
You know what Mommy
You went to the doctor today.
I can hear that doctor again.
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
If you're against abortion, re-post this and if you almost cried post this in your profile
This story is about a little girl that was abused. If you care at all, paste this in your profile:
My name is sarah
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all
I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long
When I awake I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home.
When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight
Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the wall.
I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry.
He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.
He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate.
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor.
My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy,
child abuse, MAKE IT STOP!
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
REPOST THIS IF YOU THINK HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG.
If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't ignore it because the Bible says if you deny Me, I will deny you in front of My Father and the glory of Heaven.
If you have cried when your favorite character died/almost died copy and paste to your profile
I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.: Iheartjake1220, FaerieRose13, Dancer4Life15,Marigold Winters, SparklingTopazEyes, chocoholic4eva, xXKatieCullenX, Bby-Leyla-Vamp, Shiny-silver-volvo-stalker, MegTheVampire, Crimson Love20, Scarlet Dawn, Queenoflove, Bealive-Your-Imagination, Lilchany, suckishLEMONADE, Alice Rocker
Fancy a challenge? Try this: I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool!
Copy the bunny into your profile to help him achieve world domination, and come join the dark side. (We have cookies.)
Scarlet: OMG A BUNNY!! Bye Lazy! I'm off to the dark side!
What?? I have a name you know.
Scarlet: They have cookies dude. We can't not go!
Louis: Ooh, I want to go!
Terry: The Dark Side has to be more exciting than here.
Sam: Ooh, goody! Cookies!
Till: We want to come too!
Wrevor: Biscuits are our favourite snack!!!
Till: We'll drive!
You can't drive!
Wrevor: Says who?
Todd: Well, I'm not staying with you so, I'm coming too!
-we all set off-
AJ: Guys...? Guys...? Hello? Guys??? *looks around* Where did everybody go??
If you're a bad athlete and proud of it copy and paste this to your profile.
If everytime you hear the word rum, you automatically think of Captain Jack Sparrow, put this on your profile!
If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get, like, two reviews, copy this into your profile.
If you think you should be able to watch what you want on TV without being called immature, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you believe in doing what you love, no matter what other people might think, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are a chocoholic copy this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you say it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile..
If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into your profile!
If you have a lot of fanfic ideas in your head but are unable to bring yourself to write them, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a tendency to talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that Writer's Block sucs, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.
A large percent of writers don't know the difference between 'your' and 'you're'. If you're one of the ones who does know and wants to SLUG them, put this in your profile.
If you get a kick out of explosions, put this in your profile.
If you can't stop putting these things on your profile, copy and paste this to your profile!
If your profile is longer than the chapters of most of your stories copy and paste this to your profile.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you like to read what people put in their profiles, and you like Copy & Paste stuff, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!
If you already have a gajillionof these "copy this into your profile" things, copy this into your profile.
If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.
I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it. If you are insane, enjoying every second, and proud of it, copy this and paste it into your profile.
If you have ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.
If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE
If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile
If you have ever made up your own language just for fun, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think it's stupid that girls are associated with the color pink, copy and paste this into your profile
If people think you are mentally insane copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy and paste this into your profile
If you spend multiple hours each day reading and/or writing copy and paste this into your profile
If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have a million and one notebooks, and still need more for your imagination or creativity, copy this into your profile
If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have no idea what people are talking about yet you pretend that you do, copy and paste this on your profile.
CoPy AnD pAsTe ThIs To YoU aRe PrOfIlE iF yOuR aWeSoMe!i!
YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...
You talk to yourself a lot.
You talk to yourself about talking to yourself.
When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else.
After uttering a profound peice of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow, this stuff is great for sugar highs..."
You live off of sugar and caffine
People think you're insane.
You'll check your e-mail every day of the week one week, and then dissappear off the face of the earth the next.
You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.
No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.
The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.
Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.
People think you have A.D.D.
You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.
You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.
You start thinking about making lists like this and start laughing for no "apparent" reason
Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.
And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.
(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)
Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over. (I think it succeeded)
Do not read this next posting. I only posted it cuz I'm super paranoid.
-This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. -Lucillia
You may continue reading. (ten bucks says half of you read it.)
Scarlet: There's nothing left to read though!
There isn't?? -looks at design- Crap! You're right...
Todd: I told you but you wouldn't listen.
Terry: I can vouch for him.
Todd: Why? Are you people stalking me again?
All my VIMHs and probably some random people (Jen aka suckishLEMONADE): -staring at him- Maaaaybe...
Todd: Er... -takes a step back-
Scarlet: You're breath smells like mints!
Todd: ... -runs-
Scarlet: AFTER HIM!
Everyone: -tramples me to follow Todd-
Unsafe External Link