Uh...I've got an account on FanFiction, too, if you, uh, wanna check that out. The pen name is the same. But I'm not putting the link. Figure it out.

Ah, finally. Introductions are over. As we all know, I can't do those to save my life. Moving on!

Now, because I have Amazing Couples on FanFic, I'll put Awful Couples here. Woot! (Note: MAJOR SPOILERS UP AHEAD FOR BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER AND HARRY POTTER...I guess. DON'T READ IF YOU ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF READING THE HP BOOKS OR WATCHING BtVS.)

Awful Couples of All Time

Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel

Buffy and Riley (That one episode in season four...ghosties...shudders)

Giles and Olivia (SHE SHOWS UP IN ONE FREAKIN' EPISODE THEN FALLS OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH!)

Angel and Drusilla (One question: WHY?!)

Angel and Cordelia (Cordy is dead, okay?! Be happy, Angel, and stay away from these sick, twisted girls!)

Willow and Kennedy (Anti-Tara, Joss? Really? Leave Willow alone already!)

Xander and Dawn (You've got to be kidding me. Ever heard of pedophilia, guys? We don't accept that here in Ashley-world, moving on!)

Spike and Buffy (I love Spike. I always will. But, honestly? I can't. I don't care what anyone says, I know Spike loves her, but after everything that happened in seasons 5 and 6, I think they both need to move past it all and let each other go. No matter what they do, it will NEVER be perfectly right again. The two years in which Spike was obsessed with her and she used him...they've scarred me pretty bad, so it's probably scarred them worse.)

Gunn and Fred (Let me just get this out of the way before I say anything else: I. Love. Wesley. He's a British badass, and, you know what? He's better than Gunn. Gunn's a wonderful guy, I guess, but he's a smart-mouthed know-it-all and he offends my intelligence constantly. Then again, I don't like Fred either, so I guess this couple might work...but I want Wesley to not be sad. :( )

Connor and Cordelia (Okay, she's pretty much your mom, Connor. GET. OVER. HER.)

Harry the Potty (er, Harry Potter)

Hermione and Ron (He's an ogre. Wanna date an ogre, girls? Date Ron.)

Harry and Ginny (What the hell is with all the Weasleys? You want to hook someone up with a Weasley, go with one of the twins, but, Ginny? She sucks freaking buffalo balls.)

Draco and Patsy (She's a vile, vile girl!)

Snape and No One (HE DESERVES LOVE!!)

James and Lily (You two created a toilet. How does that feel? Not good, huh? Go be with Severus, Lily, do us a favor. And, for the love of all things pure and simple, someone Avada Kedavra James already! ((Oh, right. Thanks, Voldy!)) )

Voldemort and No One (HE DESERVES HIS SNAKE!!)

Other Books/Movies/TV Shows

Any Couple In Twilight (Bella: OCD Edward: OCD Jacob: ADD. I win.)

Dean/Sam (I love both of them, but incest? Really? God, people these days...)

Dean/Lisa (NO LISA. NEVER LISA. I AM DEAN'S ONE AND ONLY...I mean, what?)

Sam/Ruby (Don't even make me explain this one. Please.)

Hannah/Booth (HANNAH ALSO NEEDS TO DIE. I AM NOT BOOTH'S ONE AND ONLY, BRENNAN IS BOOTH'S ONE AND ONLY. GET. IT. RIGHT.)

Would you like to hear about the music that has pumped me to write my best work? Yeah? YEAH? Okay, no. I won't tell you. I'll give you a few songs, though, just as a preview. (Note: these are so not a few. So ignore that little word there, because if you scroll down reeeeeally far, there's a crapload of music.)

One Summer's Day by Joe Hisaishi, and everything else on the Spirited Away soundtrack. (What can I say? I'm a Miyazaki girl.)

Seventeen Forever by Metro Station. (Will you be seventeen forever? Edward will. *Note: I believe that Edward is a buttmunch. No offense to him ((jk, I mean SO much offense towards him!).*)

Angel by Natasha Bedingfield. (Angel will be my angel. Play on words. Woot.)

Rock With You by Michael Jackson. (...Oh, how I miss the 80s. Not.)

Permanent Heartbreak by The Friday Night Boys. (Thank you, Skippy. Your fault.)

Where the Lines Overlap by Paramore. (Actually, I like more of their songs. But that's a previewwww.)

Anything in the album Maybe I'm Dreaming by Owl City. (The Saltwater Room, Rainbow Veins, I'll Meet You There, On the Wing, Dear Vienna, Air Traffic, Early Birdie, The Technicolor Phase, This is the Future, West Coast Friendship. But I've never heard Sky Diver.)

Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring by Bach. (Didn't see that coming, did you?)

Coffeeshop Soundtrack by All Time Low. (It's an addiction, really.)

Walk Through the Fire by Buffy the Vampire Slayer cast. (And all of the songs on the Once More, With Feeling soundtrack!)

Animal by Neon Trees. (Now, THIS is an addiction.)

AFTER MIDNIGHT BY J MINUS. (God, this is a beautiful song. Beauty. B.E.A.U.T.Y. And I like midnight. :D)

To Plant a Seed by We Came as Romans. (If you plan on listening to this, tis very screamo-y.)

Hot N Cold by Woe, Is Me. ("You change your mind like a...psycho bitch but the sex is good so I think I'll keep you around.")

Real Love by Regina Spektor. (I know real love. That's what Angel and Spike are for.)

Do You Know What I'm Seeing? by Panic! At the Disco. (Just a really cool song...makes me think of a Greek garden...dunno why.)

Ballad for Dead Friends by Dashboard Prophets. (Played on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. :D)

Sugar Water by Cibo Matto. (Also played on Buffy the Vampire Slayer! :D)

Wonderwall by Cartel. (I know this isn't originally theirs, but I like the way they did it more.)

Mr. Spock by Nerf Herder. (SO FREAKIN' FUNNY!)

Crash World by Hilary Duff. (Okay, yeah, she's kind of a sucky singer, but, come on, the song is awesome.)

Until the Day I Die by Story of the Year. (Watch the whole series of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, then tell them this doesn't describe G-man. ((AKA Giles.)) )

Alice is Dead by Hania Lee. (I'm going through this phase where Alice in Wonderland crap is showing up at every corner of my life, so, since it's obviously a sign, I'm now listening to the music. Might as well roll with it, ya know?)

Slow Down by The Academy Is... (I love this song so freakin' much. With songs, I usually have one favorite part that I'm addicted to, but this one has multiple addicting parts. Yay!)

Her Name is Alice by Shinedown. (Hell yes.)

Over My Head (Cable Car) by The Fray. (I cry a lot when I hear this song. Wonder why.)

I'm Gonna Fly by Sydney Forest. (It reminds me of my childhood, because that's when I watched Kiki's Delivery Service. Oh! If you're awesome, watch it. And you'll become awesomer.)

I Can't Take My Eyes Off You by Melanie Doane. (Holy butterballs, this song is so beautiful...WAAAAAH, I MISS YOU, TARA!!!!!...I'm okay now.)

L.A. Song by Christian Kane. (When I first heard him...well, I was considering adding him to my fictional boyfriends count! ((But I didn't. :P)) )

Pretty Girl by Sugarcult. (I imagine Buffy getting abused by Angelus and get all butterfly-happy inside.)

Little Lion Man by Mumford and Sons. (I saw a video about Wesley with this song...I MISS YOU, WESLEY!!!!!!!!)

Falling by Florence and the Machine. (I don't know why I like this song, but it kind of reminds me of American Girl Dolls. I literally have absolutely no idea why, and it frightens me.)

Mercy by OneRepublic. (Angel of mercy...I MISS YOU, ANGEL!!!!!!!!!)

Find a Way by SafetySuit. (Um...I don't know why I like this song. It's pretty? Don't ask me questions.)

Enjoy the Silence by Anberlin. (I actually think I used to hear this when I was younger, because it seems familiar...but I'm not sure. It's odd.)

Eyes on Fire by Blue Foundation. (DON'T SAY IT! I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING! I DON'T LIKE IT BECAUSE IT WAS IN TWILIGHT! Truthfully, I didn't know it was in Twilight until recently. I had discovered in a BUFFY fanvideo. Meh. But I still love it.)

Angels on the Moon by Thriving Ivory. (I used to listen to this song a lot when it played on the radio, but I haven't heard it in a while. Memories!)

All at Once by The Fray. (There is no excuse for this. I just love The Fray.)

Burnin' For You by Blue Oyster Cult. (Blame Supernatural. :) Also, I'm partial to Fire of Unknown Origin.)

Clocks by Coldplay. (Now, THIS is a song from my carefree days.)

Hideaway by The Weepies. (This song reminds me of pretty summer days. Also, the song The World Spins Madly On reminds me of Wesley and Fred, because they never got their chance and when Fred died, Wesley was all depressed until he died.)

Mr. Brightside by The Killers. (I love this song so very much, for no apparent reason at all.)

Explorers by Sky Sailing. (Also Captains of the Sky and Brielle. Fun fact? Sky Sailing is the early work of Owl City.)

Carry On Wayward Son by Kansas. (I heard this song on Guitar Hero ((lame, I know)), but then I heard it again on Supernatural. Needless to say, I was a happy clam.)

Somebody That I Used to Know by Gotye. (I'm not much of a radio-listener, but this song I heard on a very quirky and lovely Buffy the Vampire Slayer fanvid, so I fell in love with it.)

Set Fire to the Third Bar by Snow Patrol. (I don't know what's so pretty about this song. It. Just. Is.)

Hell's Bells by ACDC. (Remember who to blame!)

Eye of the Tiger by Survivor. (Um...Jensen Ackles, Yellow Fever. Look it up. Laugh your face off.)

I'll Make a Man Out of You by Disney, Mulan. (I listen to this whenever I'm writing a really funny scene, because it puts me in such a good mood. :D Favorite Disney song ever!)

Burnin' For You by Blue Oyster Cult. (Sigh. Supernatural.)

Superstition by Stevie Wonder. (Again...Supernatural.)

Simple Man by Lynard Skynard. (Sensing a pattern?)

Ramblin' Man by Allman Brothers. (This I have an excuse for. It's one of those feel-good songs that I never listen to. :) )

All Right Now by Free. (Another feel-good song. I feel good now!)

Enter Sandman by Metallica. (It's funny because I don't even like Metallica. ((But Dean sings Metallica when he's nervous. What a doll.)) )

Love Me Dead by Ludo. (I heard this in a funny trailer for Castiel/Dean. I've grown attached.)

Stolen by Dashboard Confessional. (This is the cutest song in the world. It's the kind of song you'd want to hear your sweetheart sing to you. Ahhhh. :D)

Stockholm Syndrome by Muse. (Heard this in a Sam/Dean video, and you can tell I really like the song if I put it on the list when I actually hate Sam/Dean.)

Shattered by Trading Yesterday. (I used to hear this song a lot, but I lost touch and soon rediscovered it. Yay for Internet.)

Everything is Alright by Motion City Soundtrack. (Fantastic song, I'd highly recommend listening to it if you're down. It always reminds me of Supernatural and Buffy, the former because I heard it in a fanvid, and the latter because it sounds so 90's and so adorable, like the show.)

Don't Panic by Coldplay. (Originally heard it in a Supernatural fanvid, but it always reminds me of the cold, dead feeling you get when summer's over, all the fun's over, and it's October. Also, something about my childhood and the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving special...but pretty much that cold weather with leaves and other fall crap. It's such a sad song but so beautiful. I can only listen to it in increments or I go crazy. ,) )

Just Kidding, I Pretty Much Love Everything That Coldplay Makes. (Warning: Not a real song.)

45 by Shinedown. (Holy God. This song is so full of emotion, so full of truth...HOLY MOTHER OF BUTT SAUCE. ((That was weird.)) Do listen to this song. Like, for rizzles. It's really powerful.)

I Will Follow You Into the Dark by Death Cab for Cutie. (I like this song, it's sweet and nice. But the cover by Gavin Mikhail is really earth-shattering, so I'd recommend listening to both this and the cover by him if you want the full awesome effect.)

Stars and Boulevards by Augustana. (The lead singer can't exactly hit some of the high notes, but...I don't know. It's just a really catchy, laid-back summer song to me. Even though the lyrics don't make it seem like that...)

Dirty Laundry by Bitter:Sweet. (I don't know. This is just a fun song. Kinda inappropro, but it's really cool.)

Everybody Loves Me by OneRepublic. (Again, fun song. This one's a little funnier, though. :P)

Drops of Jupiter by Train. (This is the kind of song that makes me want to get up and do some kind of mind-blowing dance that my unflexible legs cannot do. In other words? Amazing song.)

Getting the picture? Yep, that would be my music tastes. But with most of the artists, I like other of their songs, too. I'm a narrow-minded person, though. Never forget that. So, ya know. Enjoy. Listen. Happy. Fun.

Yay, I love manga. And anime. But manga's more fun! Some mangas I adore: Shugo Chara!, Ultra Maniac, Mamotte! Lollipop, Kitchen Princess, and .hack. Some animes I adore: Sailor Moon, (these coming up are movies, mostly by Miyazaki, who is my second hero) Spirited Away, Howl's Moving Castle (I HATE YOU, HOWL!...'cept sometimes), and Kiki's Delivery Service.

Anyway, does you want to hear about my family? If not, skip this top ten list!

10. My mom's side of the family are hilarious Puerto Ricans. I'm closer to them.

9. My dad's side of the family are hicks. (Not that I don't like hicks!) We don't see them as much.

8. I love all three of my aunts. They're all sweet.

7. I love my one uncle. Last time I saw him, I watched Paranormal Activity 2 and later told the story to my easily-scared friend backstage at play practice, when it was dark and spooky and she spazzed.

6. My parents are not together, but they're BFFSTIH. (Best friends for some time, I hope.)

5. I have a younger brother, whose leg I broke when I was three, and an older sister who sometimes scares me.

4. We used to have three guinea pigs, but they passed on. (Cube's gone now.) Instead, we have the cutest, fattest cat ever named BOOTS! (I call him Bootsbutt...he's so cute.)

3. I am the middle child. D:

2. We eat dinner together every day. We're a good family.

1. I LOVE MY SECOND-COUSIN, ARIANA! ALSO CALLED PUDDING! SO CUTE! (Kadyn WILL marry her.)

Now, here's a real paragraph that describes me:

Hi. I'm Ashley. I'm kind of a picky person, so I don't watch TV much, unless the shows Bones, The Nanny, Supernatural, Grimm, Angel, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Pretty Little Liars, or Switched at Birth are on. Otherwise, I don't watch much TV. I'm also a music freak. When my computer's sound stopped working, I freaked (but me gots a new laptop). How would I get my music? Grrr. I'm also Puerto Rican, but I don't look it. If you met my family, you'd understand. I'm in my teens, and I'd love it if you checked out TwilightGirl4's work. She's really good! And quite funny! Oh, and then there's taylorsplash. Well, she's...she's a different one. That's all for now!

Um, what else? Well, I have a story posted here, called Lessons Not Learned. I, um, have some dilemmas going on, so if anything happens in that story that you don't like, I'm sorry. The story as is is kind of fuzzy. I don't know how it's going to end. It scares me. However, the story is ending soon...but don't be too happy/sad/angry/frustrated! I'm the kind of writer that picks right up on another story once one is finished. Update: It's over, ya'll. Say bye-bye to Angel, Spike, Alcee, Gwen, Lulu, etc. Hope you had fun on the ride!

Here's another fun thing: I wrote a new story, The Diary of a Chicken Salad. It's much more lighthearted, less drama-y, I didn't use any names from TV shows that I'm married to (though the whole Willow thing was an accident, as I started the outline of the story before I started watching Buffy, though I added the boys' names in when I started watching it), and...well, overall, I think it'll be kind of fun. Not sure how it'll work out, but, hey, if you didn't like LNL (or, I guess, if you did, since, ya know, I'm still the writer), you can read this one! Win-win! (Quick note: I don't update very quickly, boo me, blah, blah, but if you DO like this story, I'd advise reviewing. I'm not sure if I'm going to continue with this, not because I'm lazy, just because I'm not feeling too inspired. So, review lots and maybe some inspiration will strike!) Edit: Ugh. I haven't removed it, but it would make more sense if I had. I just have so much going on right now, there is no way I can continue with a novel. I'm sorry, guys!

Anyway, I am a reader. Big on bookworm-ia. (Note: NOT A DISEASE.) Some of my favorite authors are Sarah Dessen, Scott Westerfeld, Jane Austen, Lewis Carroll, Patricia Cornwell, and Meg Cabot. (Note: These are in no particular order.)

Some of my favorite books are: Someone Like You, Pride and Prejudice, The Mediator series, Harry Potter series, the Uglies series, Lock and Key, Just Listen, The Truth about Forever, ALICE AND HER ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND! (just because it's stalking me doesn't mean I don't like it! :P), Pants On Fire, Book of a Thousand Days, Impossible, Angel (not the boy, sadly), The Looking Glass Wars series, The Lovely Bones, Blank Confessions, anything by Patricia Cornwell (but especially the Scarpetta series), and...well, many more. Those were just off the top of my head. (And Google's.)

I likey Alice in Wonderland. :) If you read above, in my music tastes, then you realize it's stalking me. (If you didn't read above, then I probably sound like a total loon, so you might want to do that.) I've read the books, totally loved them (Alice likes kitties, too!), I hate the Disney movies because they totally screwed it up, and I bought Alice: Madness Returns for 20 bucks off (no, I'm not a cheapo, I just came with the 60 bucks and it was 40 instead). I started this new obsession (BUT, IT DOES NOT REPLACE BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER EVER) when I played the online game Alice is Dead (wanna play it? It's at kongregate.com, search for Alice is Dead. There are three games, but the third one isn't on Kongregate), and, since then, it's been stalking me. It's attached to me, I like that. :) I'm okay with the Tim Burton movie, but I think it could've been better. (I mean, for one thing, Alice is a BRUNETTE. Get that through your thick skulls! Lewis Carroll...he made her as a BRUNETTE. I still can't see her as a brunette, but at least I know. Now you do, too.) After I play the game (as in American McGee's Alice, which I'm playing now) and get the soundtrack and wear it out, I'll probably resort to sequels (not made by Lewis D:).

I love Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Never the movie. Never the comic books. Always the series. But the character Buffy is a moron. I'd love to stab HER with a stake. (Note: those two sentences don't even come close to my hate for her. They just barely scratch the surface. BARELY.) I'M IN LOVE WITH A CHARACTER NAMED ANGEL. IS THAT NORMAL? (Of course it's not.) I've got this rivalry between Spike and Angel going on. After watching the whole series of Buffy, I was like "Spike's my guy. I feel bad about that, sorry, Angel, but Spike is it." Now, I've watched Angel (I hate watching two sister/brother shows at the same time) and I don't know. I just don't know. (Though I just want to say that I think I really do love Angel more, but it's as if a part of me is still like, "Oh, HELL no, you're in love with Spike, bitch!" so I'm just like, "Ehhhh...whatever.") I also love Tara, Willow, Giles, Anya (BUNNIES!!), Xander (when he's not being a DRAMA QUEEN), Jenny Calendar, Kendra, Drusilla, Amanda, Chloe, Rona, and Molly. I'm sorry to the ones who have died. So sorry. (By the way, those video games...fun! If you have violence issues/lurv the show/want to be a Slayer/just simply enjoy killing vampires, Buffy the Vampire Slayer is the game for you! Note: Personally, I don't really like Chaos Bleeds as much, because of the saving options and the fact that the camera stays on the person all the time. Me: You know, it'd be nice if I could see the hideous, powerful demons that want to rip my heart out coming up behind me. Eurocom (the developers): But...you can see Buffy's pretty face! Me: DIE.)

Currently, I'm a Supernatural fangirl. Why, I cannot tell you. But one day, I was on YouTube (OH NOES!) and I saw a fanvid about Buffy with Dean. I was like, "*eyes glued to screen* WHO IS THIS LOVELY MAN I SEE?!" and I soon found out that it was none other than the lovely-but-mentally-unstable Dean Winchester, brother of the adorable-but-kind-of-square Sam Winchester, of the television show Supernatural that may or may not be renewed for an eighth season. (I hope it will be a yes on that one.) Edit: It was a yes on that one! Yay, season eight! I'm on the end of season three (but right now, it's 4/22/12, and I'm sure by next week, I'll be halfway through season four), and I'm in love with it. Edit: I'm on season seven now. Hopefully I'll be all caught up by the time season eight approaches! Dean is my favorite of the two brothers, because he's prettier and he's more like me. Also, Jensen Ackles. EEEP. Yeah, but I actually do like the plotline, the whole vigilantes-who-are-too-hot-to-be-alive-carrying-out-their-father's-legacy thing is not only superhot, but something that I liked about Buffy and Angel, too. (Except Buffy was a huge stickler for the law, while Dean and Sam...not so much.) I could never love it as much as Buffy or Angel, but, for now, it's my newest obsession. (Also, I've been watching Grimm, Pretty Little Liars, and Switched at Birth, but none of them are quite as awesome as Supernatural, so they're only small blips on the Ashley-love radar.) And I wrote this before I found Castiel, and I just want to say that Castiel is the most amazing guy ever. I don't love him as much as Dean...but after the events of seasons four and six, I'm tired of Sam. He's driven me over the edge. But Cas...I hate what Sam and Dean do to Cas. Like, if Cas messes up once, they ostracize him, but if Sam freaking sucks blood from a demon, he's all okay. I HATE THAT.

Willow's costume from Lessons Not Learned, Chapter Seven: Masquerade: http://www.partycity.com/product/teengirlsqueenofheartscostume.do?sortby=ourPicks&pp=20&size=all

Willow's New Year's party outfit from Lessons Not Learned, Chapter Fourteen: New Year: http://www.polyvore.com/willows_new_years_outfit/set?id=26356410

Words like foppotee, scaevity, etc.: http://www.savethewords.org

My favorite actor: David Boreanaz. End of story. Forever and always.

If you read that whole thing...kudos to you. You must be magical. No prize, sorry, just a little praise from the wannabe-Slayer. :) If you've got any questions about me/what I do/what I write/all that other crap, you can message me. There's a little button at the top of the page, right, so you can just click that and knock yourself out.

WAIT! DON'T GO YET!

I see no point in living if I can't beautiful. (That was said by Howl, not me. Promise.)

Kay. You can go now.

Ashley. (Call me Ash-a-lee and I will smack you upside the head.)