Name: Dalton (and Asha)

Age: 22 (and 20)

Height: 6ft 3in (and 5ft 1in)

Weight: 254lbs (I'm 90lbs he outweighs me almost 3 to 1!)

Eye color: (not sure why you'd want to know this): blue-green (They are the most beautiful color ever! Mine are brown :-p) I happen to like brown

Complexion: I'm the whitest person that we know though I'm not an albino or anything like that. I don't tan I just burn horribly then go back to being white as hell. (I on the otherhand am tan. Arabic background and being tan kind of go hand in hand afterall).

Birthplace: Georgia the state not the country. And no I only lived there for a year so I'm not a "hick". (I was born in Saudi Arabia and I moved to America at age 12).

Launguages: I speak American Damn it, and a few insulting words in Spanish, German, and Arabic. (He means English *sigh*. I also speak English as well as Arabic, and I'm learning Spanish).

Outlook on Life: I'm cynical, not "Oh god the world sucks! Now I'm going to cute myself." No I'm more of "Hahaha people are stupid" (meaning that he isn't a sad about it he finds it funny "in a pathetic kind of way". I on the other hand am an optimist. And proud of it!)

Favorite Movie: Monty Python and the Holy Grail (Shaun of the Dead and yes I know that's a wierd movie for a girl to like).

Favorite Book: All Quite on the Western Front (The Bartimeaus Trilogy they're hilarious!)

Favorite Games: Mass Effect series, Dragon Age series, Bioshock series, F.E.A.R. series (Not me to scary), Left 4 Dead series (I love anything with zombies!), Dawn of War 1,2, and the expansion packs (Not me), Fable series (I don't like Fable 2), and the Overlord series (the minions are sooooo cute, and soooooo evil!)

Favorite T.V. Shows: Red Vs. Blue (We know it isn't really a T.V. show but it's awesome so it's on the list), Ugly Americans, Scrubs, Frisky Dingo, The Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead (I really like zombies as I said before!), The Office, Parks and Recreation, 30 Rock, and Community

Our pets include: A 180lb Newfoundland named Bernie (He's so cute! And huge!) A 35lb Pitbull American Bulldog mix named LuLu (She's still growing. She's the most well behaved puppy ever!) And a Bearded Dragon named Spike (He's a lizard and I guess he's cute in a spikey kind of way)

About us: We are a newly married couple from the northeastern region of the USA. (I still can't believe we're married!) Asha is currently in college for nursing. (Good thing too given his history of accidents induced by two parts tardishness and one part bad luck).

I am the most accident prone person that either of us know. We're putting up a running tally of all my injuries above scrapes and bruises (unless they have good stories behind them) for others entertainment. (Oh and be warned some of these are kind of graphic).

I was recently compaired to The Most Interesting Man Alive from some beer commercials due to my awesome injury stories. "Stay Thirsty my Friends!" (Thank you for that by the way SimplySupreme. :-/ The last thing Dalton needed was an ego boost).

Broken Bones: 14

Broken shoulder: (He got pushed down an escalator by some random person for running up and down the damn thing because it looked "fun").

Broken right foot: I drop kicked a thirty pound medicine ball at age seven.

Two broken ribs: A horrible, horrible sledding accident.

Fractured skull: (He fell asleep sitting on a park bench and hit his head on the concrete ground).

My femur enjoyed fresh air far too much for it to be healthy: (He was hit by a car and tossed into a tree after shoving me out of the way).

Snapped my left big toe: (He had an “accident” with a staple gun).

Fractured my hand: Falling through a glass table. (He was drunk out of his mind).

Dislocated right index finger: I passed out after spending fifty-six hours up strait during my twenty-first birthday weekend.

Broken nose: My 180lb Newfoundland named Bernie head butted me.

Another broken nose: I chased Asha through a mirror maze in a carnival and ran face first into the wall. (He was lucky I could set his nose or it would have ended up bent!)

Snapped finger bone: (All I will say is it involved a nail). An evil nail!

Broke my left foot: Tripping over an inflatable pool.

Broken ankle: (He tripped over his own feet on Holloween).

Snapped my left arm: I took a tumble out of my bedroom window on the second story of our old house. (He was actually quite lucky he missed our concret padio by less then a foot. Only his arm hit it).

Took a tumble down a cliff: (He slipped off of the path and tumbled down to the next switch-back). When I tried to walk I found that my pinky toe was hanging from a sliver of skin. Don't worry the doctors fixed it (*sigh* the doctors kind of need to stop he'll never learn this way).

Other injuries:

Three inch scar on my thumb: I babysitted my sister's hamster and it bit me. So I lifted my hand out of the cage with it hanging from my hand with blood dripping down its face. So I glared at it and flung my hand around to get it off and the evil little bastard hit the brick wall head first and died. I regret nothing! I lived as few men dared to dream! (I would feel bad for it but it was evil. I think it was possessed!)

I was headbutted by an adolescent elephant during our honeymoon in Thailand. (Adolescent meaning it was only as tall as him). I lost consciousness for a few seconds in mid air but hitting the ground 13 ft away was a nice wake up call.

I was shot by a crazed druggy who tried to mug my then fiance now wife. I "only" got a punctured lung and the bullet grazed my heart after bouncing off of my shoulder blade. (That was sooooo much fun! It wasn’t stressful or scary as hell at all). I'll tell you it's quite disconserting to wake up and your first human contact being a doctor who says ,quite casually I might add like he was talking about the weather, that my heart stopped twice once for over a minute! (He is fine now so don't worry).

Random strange thing we learned about me recently: I have "Sensory Intergration Dysfunction in respect to cold". (Meaning that for some bazaar reason Dalton feels about one fourth the cold that normal people would feel. Unfortunatly this doesn't mean that he is immune to cold he can get frostbite like anyone else). I admit that does explain how I almost never get cold and can wear t-shirts in the winter.

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.