![]() Author has written 5 stories for General, Fantasy, Life, and Romance. "... the world around me can see what they want to see." Quote of my day: "All life demands struggle." July 24, 2012: My quote for today would be "Be fierce, loyal, and kind to anyone deserving." Whoa. I was different a few months ago! I'm like, allll sad now because feel REALLY REALLY OLD! I was reading this and I'm like, "I CAN'T KEEP UP WITH MYSELF!" Haha. So I'm moving on to a new step in my life but for an unknown reason, I do not feel it so! Mom said, and I... unfortunately quote "BECAUSE YOU HAVE A NUMB HEART!" Do you ever feel like you're waiting for some kind of emotion that never comes? It's like when you are walking down stairs and you expect there to be another step and there isn't and you're like "WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON??!" (PSHHHH YAH GRACIE! I just used "and" three times in a row, GOT A PROBLEM?!?!) Anyway, I haven't been hit by any emotion about leaving school yet nor any emotion about entering a new one! I KNOW! It's the weirdest thing, but I suppose it will come eventually! Jan. 16, 2013: When life gives you a world of crazy people, you run. Don't be surprised when you look to the side and a bunch of lunatics that are as scared as you are have been running beside you this whole time. For the new year: “Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” Thank you to everyone that has made me who I am today. Y'all probably don't even know it. Thanks to my best friend, Sarah. I don't even know who I'd be without you. I always acted like the calm and responsible one but I used to be embarrassed to say sorry. Thank you for forcefully drenching me with your sorry's every time I was upset and along with that, thank you for teaching me selflessness. To my bestie, Gracy. You killed everyone with your stupid kindness and I learned that maybe the best way to avoid fights is to pretend you care about some foolish person's mistakes. Haha. That foolish person was me a lot of the time, wasn't it? To Lexi. Because I was freaking mad when you left me to be the only one that couldn't touch her toes in PE class so in my blind rage, I started tumbling classes and am loving it! To cashier guy at my local supermarket: you were so lost when you came to this country and seeing you become this super outgoing and incredibly happy person makes me know things always get better with time. Jan. 17, 2013: Normal can never be amazing. - Mini car commercial 2013 If you spend all your time trying to be normal, you'll never know how amazing you can be!!!! Walk with confidence and smile like someone just smashed a pie in your face! Well, at least, I would smile if that happened... wouldn't you? Juliet Scar Feb. 2, 2013: Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. - Will Rogers Oh, hello! I didn't see you there! HAhah, I just imagined one of those reallly cheesy greetings... So, today, was a good day. I went to hang out with my friends, ahem thinking of weird substitute names... Lindy and Cassy, yaaa, that'll do. Except for the part where brother drove past me in the parking lot and I jumped up and down waving my arms in the air frantically because it was cold and I wanted him to drive me home then he slowed down, looked me straight in the eyes passively, and sped away!!! HOW RUDE. Then he has the pooping nerve to smile at my panting figure stumbling through the door... I hate running. But I hate the outdoors more. Do any of y'all dislike the open emptiness of the streets? Wait, I was gonna attach some kind of moral to this but forgot it. Oh, well. It's not like many people will read this :) Kids, don't sit in the middle of a street. You're at risk of being pancaked by speeding cars! So the other day was a depressing day! The first person I got to know in high school left to another school and didn't freaking tell ANYONE. She followed one of her old friends to her school. She was a really disconnected girl and I guess I do understand. Loneliness goes off her in waves but it seems she was so very comfortable in it. Holding on is hard. Perhaps more so even then letting go. She was one of those people who find it really hard to hold on and difficult to let go. A year ago, I would have dropped everything to move in with my father. It was because I knew that everyone I held dear would still be there if I came back. Sometimes, it's that security of knowing that things won't change that encourage you to leave it all behind. It's what you hold onto when you're out exploring different choices, but as soon as that constant changes, you won't know what to do with yourself. And everyone knows that the only constant in this crazy world is change. November 25, 2013: Years from now, none of this shit's gonna matter. Well said well said. My lunch buddy said something quite similar (sub name: Syddy). OH HOW I'VE CHANGED. I was reading what I wrote in Feb 2013 and I was like HOW THE HECK WAS I SODA DANG ALL-KNOWING AND SMARTICLE SOUNDING???!! That person that wrote that doesn't even sound like me. Goodness. All thoughtful. And wise. HA! Ha. ha. So life has been decent lately. You know what? I just decided now that I will never respond "Good" or "I'm fine" to the typical "How are you?" question. Nah nah nahhh too repetitive. I'll say "Decent" instead. Yes yesh the little things the little things Decent. Well it could be worse. PSH. This was the hardest week of the school year so far. Out of the five days of the week, I missed two. Lemme give you brief overview: FREAKING car crash. Sympathy for the causer of the crash because he was merely 17 with no dada and a mom with no job, that worked and paid for his carinsurance by himself. FREAKING soreness. FREAKING physical therapy. Then I stupidly misplaced my WHOLE SEMESTER NOTES and couldn't turn it in, therefore got a ZERO on the WHOLE SEMESTER NOTES. Resulting in an effing EFF in my AP class. End of semester #nochance. So I did what any stressed out teenage gurl did. I cried. I cried until my eyes were puffy and my mouth tasted salty and my face felt hot with tears. I cried and my mom got worried. I cried until my mom banished that concern and just got plain mad at my nonsense rivers. Like any mom would.. hahaaha. I thought I was the only one stressed out and crying. That afternoon my friendy Cassy texted me saying "This fucking world is out to piss me off." and " I'm pretty sure I failed my oral spanish test and then I cried at lunch 11/21" I laughed and thought, TWINZIES! Everything changes when you finally figure out everyone is as scared as you. It hits you like a key lime pie to da face. Stings like H-E-double hockey sticks. So, what if I don't wanna curse?! :D Got a problemo? I end with a previous quote from a year ago that fits into this blabbery: When life gives you a world of crazy people, you run. Don't be surprised when you look to the side and a bunch of lunatics that are as scared as you are have been running beside you this whole time. God, I'm loving this quote right about now. July 2, 2014: Those who cannot change their mind cannot change anything. So, I've changed. Yes, quite a bit. Like, 2/3 years ago, I read books at school during lunch time. Now I know that even though reading is entertaining, it doesn't change that real freaking life is real and words on a page aren't. I've been involved with competitive dance and will be starting competitive cheer soon enough. I wanted to dance long before I began and there was one thing that kept me from dancing. When I look back at it, I am ummm surprised at myself I guess...? That thing was that I was afraid of people seeing my ears. To anyone that will ever read this, my advice to you is Just Do It (lol Nike). Not long ago, I was self conscious of my ears. Now, I can go out on stage in front of three judges in a leotard and perform for the audience like notgonnalie A BOSS. Now, I'm not ashamed or embarrassed or scared of what people will think of me (not nearly as much anyway). Of course, reading stories is still entertaining but only a rare pastime. And writing...? Well, I've traded an empty room, pencil and paper for a big room full of life, a sports bra, and nike pros. If you're in your room reading and ever feel alone, throw on some booty shorts, a cami and just go to da beachhhh. Or better yet, join a sport at school. Trust me, being alone all the time to indulge yourself in reading isn't getting you nowhere. |