let february die
hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 08-01-11, id: 791009, Profile Updated: 08-05-11
Author has written 1 story for Life.

there is beauty in the breakdown.

x

his little whispers
love me, love me”
that's all i ask for
love me, love me
he battered his tiny fists to feel something
wondered what it's like to touch and feel something

monster
how should I feel?
creatures lie here
looking through the windows

that night he caged her
bruised and broke her
he struggled closer
then he stole her
violet wrists and then her ankles
silent pain
then he slowly saw their nightmares were his dreams

monster
how should I feel?
creatures lie here
looking through the windows

i will
hear their voices
i'm a glass child
i am hannah's regrets

monster
how should I feel?
turn the sheets down
murder ears with pillow lace
there's bath tubs
full of glow flies
bathe in kerosene
their words tattooed in his veins
|| meg & dia : monster ||

... by morning her soul will be gone. ...
|| from first to last : and we all have a hell ||

... lie to me
convince me that i've been sick forever
and all of this will make sense
when i get better. ...
|| evanescence : breathe no more ||

... i may seem crazy
or painfully shy
and these scars wouldn't be so hidden
if you would just look me in the eye

i feel alone here and cold here
though I don't want to die
but the only anesthetic that makes me feel anything kills inside

i do not want to be afraid
i do not want to die inside just to breathe in
i'm tired of feeling so numb ...

|| plumb : cut ||

x


my name is alison.
i am nineteen; bisexual; shattered, broken and (desperately) bleeding.
i am a writer, poet and artist.
i am also a suicidal cutter.
i find relief through my words and art that i want to share with all of you here
in the hope that it will touch someone; change their perspective; help them to
feel less alone; or just grant them release.
i first became broken on january 18, 2005, when i was twelve years old,
but the catalyst for everything was february 6, 2010,
when i was raped, and as a result, destroyed and torn away from
myself.
i am an extremely open and honest person,
and often, my words are raw.
but i promise you that they will always be real.
i am not telling you all of this for the sake of attention or sympathy.
i need to let it out somehow when i can't bleed.
if i can change at least one life on here through my words,
which i hope to do throughout my entire life,
then all of this hell will be worth it.
please feel free to contact me anytime.

take back the night : kill the desperate memory reviews
GRAPHIC DEPICTION OF RAPE - TRIGGER WARNING this is my dead soul poured out in words.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 494 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 8/5/2011 - Complete
a certain slant of light (24)
a lonely september (0)
a magadalene romance (16)
a silenced revolution (174)
account not in use (0)
addie pray (0)
adsaige (69)
after-sex cigarette (1)
aiur (5)
alkfhdakjd1 (0)
all you need is oxygen (167)
always gats b y (28)
alyxnic (5)
Amarone (24)
amavian (17)
and flowers (42)
ApresMoiLeDeluge (10)
Aquafied (65)
as beauty dies (21)
ash the arsnist (107)
Ashelin (306)
Ashes.to.Acid (79)
Aslan Israel (194)
beautiful. only tempermental (2)
beauty and the breakdown (43)
between the lyrics (159)
bittersweet.season (83)
bleed gilead (18)
Bonjour Skitty (12)
bread and circuses (0)
breakdown in the waiting room (123)
brevis (89)
Bright Green (11)
burning in effigy (92)
caralita (24)
cassandove (107)
ce n'est pas que je m'appelle (4)
Chandra-Moon (50)
channel-violet (10)
Chaos Apple (87)
chaos called creation (144)
citrus scented (80)
classic violet (198)
clockwork kiss (75)
colorful (38)
contrast and friction (36)
creepy kiss on tuesday (82)
crinkled aster ribbon (42)
crocodile (22)
CuriousContradiction (5)
daisy chain heart (17)
deathbyeuphoria (18)
Delicate (7)
desolus (18)
diffident (29)
dirty windows (29)
do not resuscitate (0)
dollface and her cancer (59)
dress her up in fairytales (123)
drink me pretty (30)
E Board (109)
eine.hexe (2)
Eire Rain (1)
Elizabeth Ebony (26)
ellina HOPE (0)
emily ophelia (44)
empty tea bottles (12)
Ephemeral Seraphim (0)
Escapist (79)
euphemismsforlukewarmtragedies (0)
evm (16)
fairies and snapple (24)
Faith Adeline (21)
Faithless Juliet (939)
feverdog (16)
fluorescent youth (27)
for shame (51)
forsaken renegade (7)
four winds (119)
frugale (28)
funeralmoon (34)
gg. lass (260)
girl- reinvented (166)
give me november (18)
glimpses from an ivory tower (64)
glossolalias (69)
godawful teen-angst poetry (127)
gods dont bleed (20)
goodbye-revolution (0)
gravity of being green (11)
h3r0 z3r0 in love (59)
HellHeartedlyBent (59)
Holly Rose E (31)
i hope you choke on skittles (4)
i think that maybe (4)
i was a postcard (47)
i'll ask the stars above (41)
if i could fall (0)
if sighing (16)
if.these.bullets.could.talk (14)
in the city of neon and chrome (0)
in theory (124)
insomnia in dreamland (16)
it's not your fault (30)
Kate Marshall (36)
kelsi bones (233)
Kira of Hecale (47)
kissing walls (78)
kit feral (14)
la nuit mes yeux t'eclairent (19)
lackluster (63)
laughter at the funeral (74)
left-handed lovers (3)
lessons you learn (0)
like a lover (47)
like falling stars (26)
linaeve (72)
lipleaf (22)
Little girl Big world (131)
lovelaced (90)
lovelikeamixtape (230)
mate.feed.kill.repeat (495)
mercury.love (70)
mezzie (226)
Midnight In Eden (102)
miss lavender (79)
mizu no kokoro (132)
monster dia (8)
Moondog Dozier (879)
Moonjava (24)
moving in stillness (32)
ms. ogynist (2)
myno (0)
narcissus loved me (29)
negligible fictional force (37)
Neon-Sushi (0)
nevermore199 (144)
no thanks (14)
no.peace.los.angeles (871)
nobody's dream girl (7)
noctema (171)
none of burt's beeswax (31)
NothingMoreNothingLess (477)
notso darling (11)
october lies (30)
Ohmm (31)
Ondine's Curse (15)
oxytocin (189)
painting andromeda (64)
pangur (0)
persephone in waiting (83)
persephone wretched (9)
persephone's sketchbook (9)
petsnail (24)
plastic figurine (0)
poet tree (34)
poetic abortion (90)
poetic heretic (43)
rage of aquarius (1)
rain is acidic and we are time (2)
realityescapesher (64)
relapse into change (1)
riotmaker (197)
rusted Wings (6)
S Noelle Long (217)
saccharine lust aerial (12)
scoreboards.on.bedposts (40)
shadow-of-a-trackless-sea (18)
sharks don't sleep (164)
she left ringing in his head (32)
she smolders (0)
she's not breathing (24)
sheisdressedinpoetry (19)
siphoned afterglow (233)
sloppy firsts (20)
sluttering (0)
smile for the sunshine (333)
smile persephone (98)
Society's Cavity (24)
softersin (395)
speakeasy-love (478)
stained blue (46)
stolen hugs (216)
sylvia's syndrome (0)
synapse collapse (31)
t-t-t-ouch (195)
t. earnest (30)
tablesalt (12)
tainted x love (18)
tangerine dreamer (69)
teardrenchedviolets (0)
teh tarik (57)
the art of being obsolete (1)
the cereal killer (69)
the duck in the rain (278)
The Fourth Fate (35)
the lily (19)
the naked civil servant (0)
the prophet apathetic (53)
the sun softly smiles (34)
the tomorrow people (26)
the tuesday after (28)
the ultraviolent (5)
these calories are killing me (185)
this is my love for you (84)
this young lady (3)
ThisCut-UpAngel (281)
thursdays and rain (67)
tired-for-days (31)
tonight we bloom (1)
trying (67)
Tytherpol (0)
unbeautiful (10)
underreigns (34)
viennacantabile (49)
ville de diable (42)
water lily nymph (57)
wayfaringstrangers (54)
we are immortal (47)
whatsLefTof.me (40)
White Tea and Ginger (58)
whoregasm (56)
Whoregasmic (5)
Winterbridge (4)
wishing.on.echoes (54)
wonderland called (8)
words like bullets (6)
words on napkins (13)
x.Miss.Twiztid.x (48)
ylem (0)
young and the reckless (145)
your mom is typewritten (5)