Emerald Viper
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Joined 06-19-12, id: 849235, Profile Updated: 03-15-15
Author has written 34 stories for Fantasy, Humor, Supernatural, Mythology, Sci-Fi, Horror, Romance, and Humor.

You are most likely to find me sitting on the front porch of my house with a cup of tea. I enjoy writing. It does not pay my bills.

My other hobbies include motorcycles, computers, cooking, making jewelry, tabletop RPGS, comics & anime, history, fencing & archery (SCA), hiking, yoga, and Tae Kwon Do. I hate washing dishes and I am a notorious insomniac. I collect masks and old issues of Doctor Strange. I love animals, especially dogs and horses. I have a very clever yellow lab named "Gumbo".

I currently live in Texas, but I have also lived in seven other US states, England, and Italy.

I am always on Facebook or somewhere else filled with uselessness. I watch way too much science-fiction, especially Doctor Who.

My favorite writers are Neil Gaiman (Sandman), Douglas Adams (Hitchhiker's Guide), Roger Zelazny (Amber and Lord Demon), Robert Asprin (Myth series), Garth Nix (Sabriel), Terry Pratchett (Discworld), and Jim Butcher (Dresden Files). I do snarky banter. If I make you laugh, it's a win. I also write reprehensible fan fiction for White Wolf games such as Exalted and Vampire: The Masquerade.

In the mundane world, I am a museum curator. It is the coolest job in the world.


Feedback:

I appreciate criticism, but please make it constructive! If you comment on my stories using profanity, your comments will be removed. Please note that all stories are marked with a date such as (2003). Some of these stories were written when I was 15 - 16 years old. I understand that they could be better, but I probably won't revisit them.

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The Sovereign Sword by Gorilla0132 reviews
The Old Gods, long lost to the pages of the histories, have risen again. Now kings and tyrants must rise from the ashes in order to stand amongst the vengeful deities. As global war threatens to consume the lands of Eos, the fate of humanity hangs perilously in the balance.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 25 - Words: 172,819 - Reviews: 143 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 12/15/2015 - Published: 3/10/2013
Tongue of the Dead by Solemn Coyote reviews
Language and the afterlife. (Labyrinth 8/22/15 WINNER)
Fiction: Spiritual - Rated: T - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,883 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/18/2015 - Complete
Emilies by Solemn Coyote reviews
She was presented to the Smiths on Solstice morning; shivering and wrapped in ribbons to hide her feeding ports.
Fiction: Sci-Fi - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,520 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Published: 1/28/2013 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Sinnifer and the Vulture (2015) reviews
Seekers are bound by divine contracts to find everything from misplaced keys to lost civilizations. When Hazel strikes a deal with the Guardians to reunite her family, the secrets she uncovers will shake the foundations of her world. Related to short story "Hyde and Seek". Fixed an error in Chapter 55 pointed out by a reader.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 55 - Words: 224,436 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 10/9 - Published: 3/6/2015
CR: William Wallace Was a Ninja (Labyrinth September 2016) reviews
Death gets involved in a little "breaking and entering". Also, ninjas. The prompt was "Mash-Up" and my objective was to get it as mad as possible. Related to "Nikki Lovecraft" and "A Fool's Errand". You might enjoy this more if you read "A Fool's Errand" first or after. (Warning - Quite a lot of cussing).
Fiction: Sci-Fi - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,215 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 7/26
SOM: Out of Character (Labyrinth June 2016) reviews
"Food, Loot, and Madness" - A little bit of love for my tabletop role-playing friends, the contest prompt being "a story involving a dream" and an in-depth look at a character who will eventually appear in my Sword of the Makers series (albeit minus the fourth wall breaking). Still working on this.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,857 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/29
The Ballad of the Catfish God (2016)
My Dungeons and Dragons players decided that a large catfish they found was a deity. That wasn't even the worst thing they did. To commemorate one of our players moving to a new city (alas, we'll miss her), I wrote the story of her ridiculous character in the form of an "epic". The form I started with falls apart halfway through, but I am still working on it. Lots of inside jokes.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 812 - Published: 6/1
SOM: Dreams of Endymion (2013) reviews
Ten years ago, Luke Witchstorm washed up on a beach with no memories of his past. When he puts on a cursed ring, he finds himself drawn into a web of intrigue and dark magic. Following the clues he left for himself, he must retrace his own steps to uncover the secret of how he died, and why he came back. Sword of the Makers series. Partial update, 8/31/15. Slow, but not dead.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 47 - Words: 139,861 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 5/6 - Published: 12/9/2012
CR: A Fool's Errand (2016) reviews
Death walks into a bar, gets arrested. Short story, not a novel. Related to "Nikki Lovecraft".
Fiction: Sci-Fi - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,057 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/10
Prince Charming (Labyrinth February 2015) reviews
Prince needs a date for the MET Costume Institute ball. His best friend Ellis is a drag queen with fabulous taste in shoes. (I'm going to try and work on this some more before the deadline - not sure if it will come together).
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,399 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/31
CR: Raedawn (2002-2015) reviews
An orphaned human raised by Elves, Teyame has never quite fit in with his adoptive family. When a demon seer brings him a devastating message, Teyame embarks on a quest to save the world by killing the gods.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 84,768 - Reviews: 6 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 1/10 - Published: 12/12/2015
If We Shadows: Tempest (NANO 2015) reviews
A cop, a retired bounty hunter, a thamaturge with a dangerous interest in physics, and a mind-wiped fairy mobster join forces to search for a missing girl. A delivery boy finds himself drawn to a house where something evil is stirring, and an insane Sumerian goddess sets out to retrieve the pieces of her shattered soul. These seven individuals are about to meet in a perfect storm.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 18 - Words: 23,672 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 11/8/2015 - Published: 11/1/2015
Swamp Gods (Labyrinth October 2015) reviews
Bobby LeJeune is about to bring the girl he wants to marry home to meet his folks. Some gris-gris may be required. Prompt - "When people show you who they are, believe them." - Maya Angelou. (The characters should probably be speaking Louisiana Creole, but Creole is hard. I used Cajun French because I'm more used to it. Hope it doesn't hurt the ambiance.)
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,563 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 9/30/2015
In Zugzwang (Labyrinth August 2015) reviews
"In zugzwang" refers to the moment in a game of chess where all possible moves are bad ones. Sigurd the Saintly has been roped into negotiating the annual truce between the Summer and Winter Courts of Faerie.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,174 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/19/2015 - Complete
Mother, Must I? (Labyrinth June 2015) reviews
Horror for Children prompt. The dead must be fed. My attempt at writing a fairytale in the style of the Brothers Grimm.
Fiction: Horror - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Horror - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,133 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Updated: 6/28/2015 - Published: 5/30/2015 - Complete
D: Lovely (Failed Labyrinth June Prompt 2) reviews
Robots x Romance Forum Prompt. In the near future, "companion" robots are a common fixture in the homes of lonely, busy executives like Pierre Durant. Ordered to cook, clean, "pick up things on the floor" and "search the internet", Pierre's "Lovely" takes great pride in caring for her "Sir". Unfortunately, he does not seem to notice her existence.
Fiction: Sci-Fi - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,157 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/18/2015 - Complete
CR: Damnation Canyon (Failed Labyrinth June Prompt 1) reviews
A religious order which condemns the practice of magic hires a wizard to solve a hostage situation in a notoriously dangerous canyon infested with demons and full of arcane traps. Related to CR: Heretic.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,502 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 5/6/2015 - Complete
CR: Nikki Lovecraft (2009) reviews
Death gets run over on the George Washington bridge by a dangerous blonde who's in the demon-summoning business. Things go downhill from there. Short story, not a novel.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,032 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/1/2015 - Complete
CR: How George Met Chaucer (2009)
Two rival pirate clans, the Cavendashes and the Le Rois have been fighting over the island of Katunwe for a hundred years. George picked the wrong beach for his summer vacation. Short story, not a novel.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,428 - Published: 4/1/2015 - Complete
Toward the Light (Labyrinth April 2015) reviews
("What is hell? I maintain that it is the suffering of being unable to love." ― Fyodor Dostoyevsky) Two fallen angels attempt to escape from Hell. I put it under "Mythology" because I didn't know what else to call it.
Fiction: Mythology - Rated: T - English - Spiritual/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,092 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/31/2015
Nivarra's Tail (1995-2015) reviews
A young centaur goes on an adventure with an immortal wizard, a wisecracking cowardly dragon, and the spoiled brat who is supposed to become the king of their world. Related to "Hyde and Seek".
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 9,250 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/7/2015 - Published: 1/31/2015
Hyde and Seek (Labyrinth February 2015 Contest Winner) reviews
Everyone has a dark side. What happens when it gets loose?
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,083 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/31/2015
The Devil and Robert Johnson (2015) reviews
A young blues musician meets the Devil at the crossroads. SHORT STORY - *Rough Draft*
Fiction: Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,035 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/28/2015
SOM: Emissary (2013) reviews
Journeyman wizard Stephan Lucian is sent by the Order of Light to strike a deal with dangerous creatures of old magic. When he accidently breaks ancient faerie laws, he finds himself working as an emissary for the enemy. But all is not as it seems, and the secrets which lurk in the depths of the Sickle Wood may alter the balance of the world. Sword of the Makers series.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 19 - Words: 62,412 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 8/17/2014 - Published: 3/6/2013
SOM: The Cursed Company (2014) reviews
The Mercenary's Guild has always provided a refuge for people trying to outrun their problems. But when a mysterious girl arrives at the Coalborn Guild House in the middle of a blizzard, the members of the Cursed Company find themselves living up to their unfortunate nickname. Sword of the Makers series. Side story, not a complete novel.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,701 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 8/2/2014 - Published: 7/16/2014
SOM: Kestrel's Tale (2013)
This is the back story of Kestrel Yfair from the middle of "Dreams of Endymion" . It really is too long for a flashback and the first-person perspective makes it a bit jarring. Sword of the Makers series. Side story, not a novel.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 17,713 - Published: 7/29/2014 - Complete
SOM: Paladin (2013) reviews
Known for having a quick tongue and a quicker knife, Jack Mercy is the law amongst the thieves and whores of Ancaradis. Five years ago, he was the lieutenant of a Deathwalker. When his master was slain, he returned to stabbing and skullduggery. Now the Order of Light has come to him with a message. Mercy is the Paladin, chosen to save the world. Sword of the Makers series.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 60 - Words: 183,879 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 5/21/2014 - Published: 9/22/2012
Clan Havoc (NANO 2013) reviews
Thirty year old Steve Camden is a loser. He can't hold a job and he lives with his mother. but in the LARP "Realms of Arcadia" he's a heroic prince. When Steve is swept into a fantasy world that resembles Arcadia with his friends, it seems like a dream come true, but the LARPers don't have powers or real weapons. Can Clan Havoc make it home, or will everyone take lethal damage?
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 25 - Words: 71,311 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 2/15/2014 - Published: 4/6/2013 - Complete
SOM: Child of Man (2014)
When Duke Arsenio Valsarra's lover died, he vowed to care for her child as if it were his own. But the Duke's son is not what he seems to be. Sword of the Makers series. Side story, not a complete novel.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,137 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/10/2014 - Published: 2/9/2014
CR: Witness (2004)
Felix meets his father's mistress and learns that he has a younger brother. Meanwhile, Ireval's sanity unravels, and the gods prepare for war. Chaos Realm series.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 9 - Words: 191,045 - Favs: 3 - Updated: 6/30/2013 - Published: 6/29/2013 - Complete
CR: Heretic (2008) reviews
Raised in a religious order which condemn sorcery, a young priestess-in-training discovers she has magical powers. Chaos Realm series.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 16 - Words: 98,751 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 6/10/2013 - Published: 4/13/2013 - Complete
SOM: Seyadra's Tail (2010) reviews
Seyadra Ayud, a fugitive from the Tower and one of the last dragons in the world, seeks to fulfill a promise she made to her father centuries ago. Sword of the Makers series. Side story, not a complete novel.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 31,424 - Reviews: 6 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 4/13/2013 - Published: 3/10/2013
SOM: The Nok Market (2012)
Journeyman wizard Fabian Van Guise stumbles upon a faerie market and makes a dangerous bargain. Sword of the Makers series. Side story, not a complete novel.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,610 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/6/2013 - Complete
CR: Wanderers (2005)
Elhil has a habit of getting himself into trouble. Of course, "trouble" for a 4,000 year old immortal often means that the fate of more than one world is hanging in the balance. Chaos Realm series.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 13 - Words: 217,776 - Favs: 3 - Published: 9/30/2012 - Complete
The Wolf Prince (NANO 2011) reviews
A young wizard accidentally steals a magic box. Along with two thieves and a hapless "inventor/adventurer" he travels around the world and through time. Incorporates Celtic, Persian, Indian, Chinese and Norse mythology and lots of Shakespeare.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 27,719 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/25/2012
Stephanie Meyer Eat Your Heart Out (2010) reviews
A believable vampire love story. Sort of. This is not Twilight fiction, nor does it contain any Twilight characters.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,494 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 8/1/2012 - Complete
CR: The Immortals (2001) reviews
A demon is summoned into a realm where magic and technology coexist and the laws of physics are subject to change without warning. A magical genius with a passion for candy-coated alchemy, a perma-stoned dragon bard, and a host of dimension-hopping gangsters fight with her to save their world. Chaos Realm series.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 16 - Words: 242,038 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 7/14/2012 - Published: 6/23/2012 - Complete