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Author has written 1 story for Fantasy.
Hi! I'm Catalina! This is my profile and I hope you like it. There's a lot of stuff on it but it's all fun stuff (I hope). I've written one really crappy story that no one will read past the first chapter (except Roses are redx!) but hey, life goes on doesn't it? I live in the U.S. and I'm a kid (pretty obvious from the story, but it never hurts to mention these things). I'm actually obsessed with Harry Potter and Fanfiction, so you'll be seeing some of that stuff in my profile. I love to write, but I don't seem to be all that good at it. Anyway, enough about me. Onto the rest of my profile!
These are pictures of some of my characters:
Ann Helkery/Wellers: http://www.guardian.co.uk/tv-and-radio/2012/mar/25/geraldine-somerville-titanic-interview-day ORhttp://www.turboimagehost.com/p/3890048/GeraldineSomerville-SA_PS_1995-06.jpg.html OR http://www.bbc.co.uk/survivors/fiona.shtml
John Wellers: http://images.wikia.com/harrypotter/images/a/a6/Adrian_Rawlins_(James_Potter).jpg
Autumn Wellers (YOUNGER): http://www.washingtonpost.com/rf/image_606w/2010-2019/WashingtonPost/2011/07/06/Style/Images/hrkd7.jpg
Lily Helkery (YOUNGER): http://hp-intothefire.wdfiles.com/local--files/ginny/ginny2.jpg
Autumn Wellers (OLDER): http://data.whicdn.com/images/12270915/ginny-weasley_thumb.jpg
Lily Wellers (OLDER): http://sugarquotes.weebly.com/uploads/5/2/1/4/5214858/7681787_orig.jpg
Natalie Brown: file://localhost/Users/zhehan/Desktop/Photo%20on%202012-02-23%20at%2017.36.jpg
Angela Steelmer: file://localhost/Users/zhehan/Desktop/啊...the%20hem,%20hem%20folder/IMG_4248.jpg
Hermione McRoy: file://localhost/Users/zhehan/Desktop/啊...the%20hem,%20hem%20folder/IMG_0144.jpg
Sophia Harris: file://localhost/Users/zhehan/Desktop/IMG_0144%2012-48-36.jpg
Paulina Nkansah: file://localhost/Users/zhehan/Desktop/啊...the%20hem,%20hem%20folder/IMG_0144%2012-49-14.jpg
Seth: I think of Seth as Harry Potter without the scar and glasses :)
Nate: Like Ron, but better looking and with chocolate brown hair
Sackanah: Think of her like a human aphrodite that looks normal smiling wickedly. Ruby red lips, almond shaped caramel eyes, midnight black hair tumbling down in ringlets. Get the idea? And while she's deranged—Bellatrix Lestrange
Lestrangeo: Bald as a egg. Black sunglasses, black suit, black pants, black belt (not as in karate), black shoes...yeah
Emma Helkery: For Emma, I couldn't choose which picture, so I'll let you decide: http://www.snitchseeker.com/gallery/albums/userpics/84186/26155596.jpg or http://content8.flixster.com/photo/10/08/88/10088898_ori.jpg
Nancy Levane (I know this picture doesn't look a posh like—just think of this as Nancy Levane after she puts her hair down and loosen's up a bit): http://s3.amazonaws.com/ths_assets_production/attachment_resources/attachments/2308/original/hair-color-success-2.jpg
Ok that's all.
P.S. You don't have to tell me that the twins are Ginny Weasley/Bonnie Wright...I know that. And you may or may not have noticed that Ann Helkery/Wellers and Emma Helkery are both the actor that acts Lily Potter (née Evans) and John Wellers is the guy that acts James Potter (Senior). The rest are all anonymous :) If you want pics of other characters just PM me. That's all!
This is the stupid test! 100 stupid things that people do! Bold the ones that apply to you!
1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it
Wow, I'm an idiot.
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
tihs is weird, but interesting! If you can raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed erveylteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! Paste this to your profile if you can read this
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism
Lend you their umbrella
Take yours and say 'RUN BITCH RUN!'
Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.
Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandma, by Grandpa.
Call your parents DAD and MOM and GRAMS, GRAMPS!
Would bail you out of jail.
Would be sitting next to you saying "THAT WAS FRICKING AWESOME"
Have never seen you cry.
Won’t tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when you’re not down anymore.
Ask you to write down your number.
Have you on speed dial.
Only know a few things about you.
Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you
Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
Loses your crap and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."
Would knock on your front door.
Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."
You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
Already know not to tell.
Are only through school/college.
Are for life.
Will comfort you when the guy rejects you
Will go up to him and say 'its because you're gay isn't it?'
Will help you when you're lost
Will be giving you bad directions and screwing with your compass
Will go with you to a concert
Will be helping you kidnap the band
Will hide you from the cops
Are probably the reason they are after you
Will buy you a pregnancy test
Will be standing outside the bathroom door screaming, "Name it after me!"
Find your Prince Charming
Find him, kidnap him and then bring him to you
Will pick you up when you fall down
Will pick you up, then trip you again
Borrow your stuff for a few days then return it
Have had your stuff for so long they've forgotten it's yours
Will leave when they feel insulted
Will forgive you even if you don't know what you said wrong
Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying
Will cry with you and then go beat up the sorry loser who made you cry
Will offer you a soda
Will dump theirs on you
Will sit at the side of the pool with you when it's that time of the month
Will throw you a tampon and push you in
Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough
Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "Girl, drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste that kind of shit!"
Will be crying at your funeral
Will be sitting in jail for killing the guy who murdered you
Are little gems
Are like huge fricking diamonds!!!!!
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Man: Is this seat empty?
Man: Your place or mine?
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Man: I would go to the ends of the world for you.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put u and i together.
Man: Your eyes, they're amazing.
Man: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?
Girls, copy and paste this on your profile!
19 things you can do to make people think you're insane!
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.
Love fanfiction? Copy and Paste this onto your profile.
Fanfiction is a site for vampires trapped in human bodies.
Fanfiction is a site for wizards wating for their Hogswarts letter.
Fanfiction is a site for secret fourteen year old spies for MI6.
Fanfiction is a site for unclaimed demigods.
Fanfiction is a site for those of us who care about who Katniss will choose.
Fanfiction is a site for people who cried while reading Just Listen.
Fanfiction is a site for people who daydream and constantly imagine the impossible.
Fanfiction is a site for people who never give up.
Fanfiction is a site for those of us who aren't accepted in the real world.
Fanfiction is a site for people who have been called at least one of the following- Weirdo, Loner, Nerd, Lick, Geek, Shy, Silent, Creepy, Crazy, Insane, Eccentric, Psycho, Odd, Mental or Different.
Fanfiction is a site for girls who are deperately in love with a non existant guys. (Because they're the best kind...)
Fanfiction is a site for girls who have dreamt of Edward Cullen.
Fanfiction is a site for girls who've asked the question, 'Are you team Edward or team Jacob?'
Fanfiction is a site for people who've ever asked the question,' What do you think, Gale or Peeta?'
Fanfiction is a site for girls who've ever doodled 'Mrs Alex Rider' on their schoolbooks.
Fanfiction is a site for people who've ever compared their classmates to characters from books.
Fanfiction is a site for people who've ever compared their teachers to Voldemort.
Fanfiction is a site for people who've ever compared their parents to the Volturi.
Fanfiction is a site for those of us who can't express ourselves in life.
Fanfiction is a site for people talk to themselves... a lot.
Fanfiction is a site for people who laugh at jokes that no one else gets.
Fanfiction is a site for people who get funny looks for reading in class.
Fanfiction is a site for people who've ever exclaimed 'Voldemort out, bitches!' in the middle of an awkward silence.
Fanfiction is a site for people who always get asked to read out their stories in English Class.
Fanfiction is a site for people who admire the guy who tries to be different.
Fanfiction is a site for people who say long words that other people don't normally understand.
Fanfiction is a site for people aren't afraid to sit alone and read at lunch.
Fanfiction is a site for people who dared to call a popular guy a plonker.
Fanfiction is a site for girls who've ever dared to call a popular girl a bitch.
Fanfiction is a site for girls who don't need guys to complete them.
Fanfiction is a site for people who ditched reality and went for something different.
Fanfiction is a site for people who hang onto dreams.
Fanfiction is a site for people who are different, but don't care because, they know it's who they really are.
Copy and Paste this onto your profile if you are one of these people.
A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain."
Funny 'Wow, really?' moments:
Amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic.
I used to be normal, until I met those freaks I now call my best friends.
Having the love of your life say "We can still be friends," is like your dog dying, and your mom saying you can keep it.
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.
The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
Never knock on Deaths door. Ring the doorbell and run away; he hates that.
The trouble with alarm clocks is that they always go off when you're asleep.
My favorite word is sarcasm.
Hippopotomonstrousaequipodaliophobic - Fear of long words.
My best friends are the kind that if my house were on fire, they'd be roasting marshmallows and flirting with the firemen.
Tell the truth and run.
Friends come and go while enemies never do; they just multiply like gremlins in an olympic sized swimming pool.
Be insane- well behaved people never made history. (I have so totally got that covered)
I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that thing up in two seconds. When I play Rock, Paper, Scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you!"
"Sir, we're surrounded!"
Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy."
Therapist = The/rapist . . . Scary thought.
"Oh crap she's a morning person."
"Hi, can I come in? I'm already in, so say yes."
So You Want To Be A Death Eater: Your Guide To Everything Evil!
Greetings, new follower:
If you are reading this letter then you have doubtless been accepted into the select band of professional wizards known as the Death Eaters. If by some unprecedented chance you are reading this and you have not been accepted into the Death Eaters then I suggest you put down this letter and leave now, or the consequences for you will be as terrible as my lifelong study into the Dark Arts can make them.
Please find enclosed a short introductory guide to Death Eating, which you must memorise and then eat, to prevent security leaks. (Due to an unfortunate fatality last week, it is now permitted to cut the guide into small pieces before swallowing).
The next meeting is scheduled for midnight, 11th June, when I trust we will have the pleasure of watching your initiation ceremony. Please remember to bring a clean handsaw and enough twine. It's so distressing when people don't prepare for these events properly.
Yours in infamy,
So You Want To Be A Death Eater?
Welcome to this helpful guide to being a Death Eater. This leaflet should provide you with all the information you need to become a successful servant to the Dark Lord. It will if you know what's good for you. Please read every page before eating.
List of Equipment required for new Death Eaters:
(Equipment marked must be obtained from Messers. Gorgon & Black Limited, outfitters to the intensely evil and terminally stylish since 12 BC. Their premises are on Knockturn Alley, but they now do mail order as well.)
Long Black Robes (Casual)
Cane (For favored members only. Unauthorized possession of a cane will result in a heavy fine. Before possessing cane, it is necessary to pass a rigorous series of tests to ascertain that your carrying-a-cane-in-a-nonchalant-yet-evil-fashion skills are up to scratch).
Curses and Counter-Curses by Professor Vindictus Viridian
Death Eater may also own snake or dragon or hippogriff. But only Lord Voldemort may possess a basilisk.
Death Eater Rules:
No Death Eater shall be a spy for Dumbledore.
Frequently Asked Questions:
What happens if Voldemort is displeased with me?
As this is a fairly run (and currently short-staffed) organization, you will probably receive a warning. And some soul-destroying torture. A second offense and you will probably die a slow death. Options include:
Being slowly eaten by a manticore.
What should I do if I decide to leave the organization?
Make your funeral arrangements as quickly as possible.
What is the salary like?
You should be in this job for the principle of the thing, not for sordid reasons. So let's just say that it's much, much better than they pay at the Ministry. There will also be opportunities for pillage, looting, theft, etc., and Christmas bonuses are guaranteed.
Does the Dark Mark hurt?
Of course it does; this is an evil society after all. What are you, a wimp?
Can the Dark Mark be removed by laser treatment?
No. Only a moron would ask such a stupid question.
But it can be temporarily obscured by a good-quality concealer. (Make sure it's a shade darker than your skin tone, as a lighter shade will simply draw attention to the tattoo. Pat translucent powder over the concealer to make it last longer.)
Is there a retirement age for Death Eaters?
You probably won't live long enough to have to deal with this problem.
Can I kill personal enemies or just opponents of Voldemort?
Murder is encouraged on principle; however, personal killings should be reserved for each individual Death Eater's free time, as obviously serving Lord Voldemort is much more important. Occasional massacre outings/ dark revels may take place as rewards for good (i.e. bad) behavior.
What should I do if Voldemort is defeated at the height of his powers by a one-year-old boy?
This circumstance is so unlikely that there is no point devising a protocol to deal with it.
The Death Eater Anthem
(To be memorised by each new recruit as soon as possible). Please note that this tune should never, never, never, never be sung to the tune of "Blackadder," an inane Muggle television program to which we are completely oblivious and never watch. Honestly.
Who lurk beneath the undergrowth?
Being a Death Eater is naturally a dangerous job. Lord Voldemort accepts no liability for any pain/suffering/torture/impalement/loss of limbs/grievous bodily harm/disintegration/insanity/imprisonment/loss of soul/death which you may experience while in his service. No good will come of any attempts to sue him as a negligent employer. Trust us.
However, in order to protect members, these safety guidelines have been developed for Death Eaters both during leisure time and on missions for the Dark Lord:
Don't try to take out Harry Potter yourself. It is extremely presumptuous. Leave it to Lord Voldemort, who has much more practice.
Employ masterly deceit to conceal your allegiance to the Dark Lord: e.g., if someone accuses you of being a Death Eater, laugh carelessly and say: "No, I am not a Death Eater. Would you like a cup of tea?" This Machiavellian trickery should be enough to convince them.
If this does not convince your accuser, have them discreetly murdered. (Sussex and Fox Ltd, of 13, Knockturn Alley, run a very efficient assassination service and are currently offering cut-price deals for friends and associates of the Dark Lord. Present your membership card at the counter for further details.)
Keep your wand on you at all times, even if you are asleep/on a hot date/in the bath/on the beach/wearing very tight-fitting leather garments (or all of these at once).
Ostentatious indicators of evil, such as manic laughter/dressing entirely in black swooshy robes (Snape, this means you)/ making sinister comments/killing people should be practiced only in private.
If you suspect someone of being a spy, kill them and their family at the first opportunity. If it turns out they were not a spy at all, pass it off as a light-hearted practical joke.
Only eat food prepared by yourself or your faithful minions. Do not trust your spouse(s)/partner(s), no matter how pretty he/she/they may be.
Similarly, do not accept drinks from anyone. This may cause offense when visiting a pub or bar but it's better than being dead. Obviously.
Do not take off your mask for any reason while on a mission. If people see your face while you are conjuring the Dark Mark/ massacring etc, they may suspect that you are a Death Eater.
Do not try to smoke while wearing your mask, as it is not fireproof.
Never address your colleagues by name while on a mission. Survivors may recall it at a later date. For the same reason, never mention your address or telephone number to anyone you are kidnapping/raping/torturing/killing, no matter how attractive they may be. Evil relationship experts have stated that romance is unlikely to flourish under such circumstances anyway.
Burn all sensitive documents. Not only will this deter spies, it is also amusing as it contributes to global warming.
Set up an anti-Apparating spell round your residence (but make sure you have a Portkey handy so you're not embarrassingly trapped there if the place is attacked by Aurors).
Prepare a secret hideout for yourself should your cover be blown. Failure to do this may lead to your sharing a hideout with another Death Eating family, which often results in friction over use of bathroom facilities, television, etc.
Don't upset Lord Voldemort. It will only end in tears. (And multiple burns, fractured limbs, mortal torment, etc.)
Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is.
Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’.
Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever.
Professor Moody … the best ‘teaching’ Hoqwarts has seen in a while.
Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to tell her.
Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Leige’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’.
Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy.
Draco Malfoy … disagrees.
Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand.
Ron Weasley … is very afraid.
Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much.
Ginny Weasley … wants her Hogwarts toilet seat.
Fred Weasley … knows if he and his twin giggle at an idea for more than fifteen seconds, they may assume that it’s against the rules and therefore should not carry it out.
George Weasley … knows he and his twin will carry it out and are not remotely sorry.
Lily Evans … swears she is not in love with James Potter.
James Potter … doesn’t believe her.
Remus Lupin … would prefer less jokes about ‘his time of the month’.
Sirius Black … killed by drapery.
Andromeda Black … is going to marry a muggle – screw the consequences.
Bellatrix Black … is quietly going insane.
Narcissa Black … would like a new hairbrush.
Voldemort … does not think it would be funny if HP were to put on earmuffs and pulled out a mandrake in his presence.
Gryffindors … will jump off a cliff.
Slytherins … will push someone else off.
Hufflepuffs… will call five hundred others and build a staircase.
Ravenclaws … will get hold of a flying carpet.
In my mind Fred never died =D
And Lupin, Tonks, and Snape are hiding somewhere in Russia living a long and happy life together (although i think this is a bit irresponsible as they should probably be taking care of Teddy... Remus and Tonks I mean... Snape taking care of Teddy would be... well a bit weird...)
Twilight is a fad... HARRY POTTER IS A LIFESTYLE
Harry Potter oath
I promise to remember Tonks
Each time I knock something down.
And I promise to remember Charlie Weasley
Whenever I'm out of town.
I promise not to obey traffic laws
For Sirius's sake of course.
And I promise to remember Lupin
When my heart fills with remorse.
I promise to remember Arthur
Whenever I am at St Mungo's Room.
And I promise to remember the Weasley Twins
Every time fireworks boom.
I promise to remember Lily
When I see someone that holds pure beauty.
And I promise to remember Dobby
Whenever a pair of socks spots me.
I promise to remember Teddy
When I see someone with turquoise hair.
And I promise to remember Molly
When someone tells me they care.
I promise to remember Ginny
Whenever bogey hexes are unfurled.
I promise to remember Hermione
when a question pops in my mind.
I promise to remember Ron
when best friends stay close behind.
And I promise to remember the death eaters
When someone speaks of dominating the world.
Yes I promise to love Harry Potter
Wherever I may go
So that all may see my obsession
Because I know what the wizards know.
We defended the stone, when no one saw it coming. We found the chamber, when everyone thought it was the end. We freed the prisoner, so the innocent had their freedom. We were chosen by the Goblet, and witnessed evil return. We fought with the order, and learnt of our fate. We learned of the prince, and the dangerous road that waited a head. We dominated the deathly hallows, and all was well. Who are we? You may wonder. We are the one's who stuck with Harry 'till the very end.
I have always been in between Ravenclaw, Gryffindor, and Hufflepuff, but never Slytherin.
Personality Lab Test: Hufflepuff
The Almighty Guru Test: Ravenclaw
Sorting Hat.Com Test: Gryffindor
Hello Quizzy.Com: Gryffindor
Quibblo Test: Ravenclaw
All The Tests.Com: Ravenclaw
So I suppose I'm mostly Ravenclaw :)
;) *Catalina* ;)
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