Redrosey18
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Joined 07-24-12, id: 859525, Profile Updated: 02-17-13
Author has written 7 stories for Manga, Romance, and Young Adult.

Love fanfiction so much and now im on Fictionpress, hope everyone is as nice here as on fanfiction!!!!

Birthday: August 25

Current Temp: cold, its winter

Current Location: Living room, watching Star Trek

Eye Color: Blue

Hair Color: Dark Brown with light brown high lights

Height: 5' 3''

Right Handed or Left Handed: Right

The Shoes You Wore Today: DCs

Your Weakness: CHOCOLATE!

Your Fears: Being eaten by a really big fish

Your Best Physical Feature: Eyes or hair

McDonalds or Burger King: Burger King

Chocolate or Vanilla: chocolate

Do you play an Instrument: flute and panio

Fave Food: pasta

Fave Music: everything

Copy/Paste

98 of teenagers do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels

If you have ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love to lie down in the grass and watch the sunset, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever started a book, then started another book, then another, and then three weeks later finished the first book and so on, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped UP stairs before, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think believe in werewolf rights copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

If you've ever pushed on a door marked pull or vice versa, copy and paste this into your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone. Weird is the same as different which is the same as unique, so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you are one of the two percent who haven't, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever walked into a window copy this onto your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCaffe, Hyperactiveley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, WeaselChick, Celyna, ShadowShapeshifterAndHerCat, Sanoon, Phantom-Flames, Leopardheart, Littlewhisker, Flamestar211, Firestar's Gal, Ravenstar-of-ShadowClan, RedRosey18

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy this into your profile.

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent that would die laughing their butts off.

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you ever forgot your name, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree,copy this into your profile.

If you think the rabbit from the Trix commercial should go to the store and by his own damn box,copy this into your profile.

If you know someone who needs to get run over,copy this into your profile.

CATS ROCK MY SOCKS! If you think cats are awesome, copy this to your profile, and add your name to this list: Brambleclaw's Babe, Amber Sea, Mistwing, Emberflame of MoonClan, Skyeheart and Silverwing, Firehawk, Rainfire, Snowfur, Firestar's Gal, Ravenstar-of-ShodowClan, RedRosey18

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, zElDaPhAnToM-bLiNdBaNdIt-RaVeN, Firehawk, Rainfire, Snowfur, Firestar's Gal, Ravenstar-of-ShodowClan, RedRosey18

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself (I find that I am a very tough opponent). So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

If someone actually thinks that you are evil and/or plotting their death, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ARE evil and/or plotting their death, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever had a conversation with someone else in your head, then suddenly started talking to them out loud, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have spelled your name wrong Paste this in your Proile

If you are accident prone Paste this in your Proile

If you think that it's not fair that the guys in manga and anime are almost always better than the guys in the real world, copy and paste this in your profile! Then add your name. List: Mit-chan007, Ni-Chan, vampgirl8, Setsuki Angel Princess, KatiechanXoxoXSesshoukun, Fluffy's Master, Pumpkin Maximus, StoryKitten, aem81197, RedRosey18

If you've ever spent a long amount of time looking for something that you were holding/wearing, copy this to your profile and add your name: I-P-O, Kilala26, Konnichiwa Minna, Kin756894, Alice001, AnimeKeepsMeSane, IchiAi, RedRosey18

If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile

If, like me, your addicted to disney, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever looked at somethin' that wasn't there because someone said "look it's ", then copy and paste this into your profile

If you ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes, copy and paste this into your profile

If your one of those people that gets excited when you see just two reviews, paste into your profile

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy and paste into your profile

Too many teenagers have smoked or tried Marijuana, if you haven't, put this into your profile

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, Sparrowflight, Snowfur, Rainfire, Firehawk, Emberpaw, Goldenfeather, Ravenstar-of-ShadowClan, RedRosey18

If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool! If you could read that put it in your profile!

please post if you believe that gay marriage should be legalized where it is not yet.

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America. (Take that Fred Phelps!)

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans. Re-post this if you believe in legalizing gay marriage.

Don't laugh at me because I'm weird, for I laugh at you, because you're normal.

I used to have superpowers, then my therapist took them away.

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was blamed.

The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.

Fighting is mind over matter. I don't mind, and you don't matter.

Knowledge is power, power corrupts. Study hard, be evil.

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

1) My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If your going to kill each other, do it outside, I just finished cleaning."

2) My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3) My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into next week!"

4) My mother taught me about LOGIC.
"Because i said so, that's why."

5) My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck you're not coming to the store with me."

6) My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean under wear, in case you have an accident."

7) My mother taight me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8) My mother taight me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9) My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Look at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

10) My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11) My mother taight me about HYPOCRISY.
"If i've told you once, I told you a million times, don't exaggerate!"

12) My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room looks like a tornado went through it!"

13) My mother taught me about the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this life, I can take you out."

14) My mother taight me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15) My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parent's like you."

16) My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17) My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when we get home!"

18) My mother taught me about MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, their going to freeze like that."

19) My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20) My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When the lawn ,mower cuts of your toes, don't come running to me."

21) M y mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22) My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23) My mother taught me ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24) My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25) Finally, my mother taught me JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

If you believe in telekinisis, raise my hand.

It's always the last place you look...of course it is, why the hell would I keep looking after I found it?

You don't die of a broken heart...you only wish you did.

Sticks and stones may scar my skin but words slice through my soul within.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.

Procrastination isn't the problem; its the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off!

We use 10 percent of our brains. Imagine how much we could accomplish if we used the other 60. (If you don't get this, I'm sorry for you.)

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice and I'll kill you.

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

Never say 'Things couldn't get any worse.' God takes that as a personal challenge.

It's people like you that make people like me need medication.

People say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well, I think guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that ?

It is not a human’s power that rules the world; it is a human power that destroys it.

If a missing person sees their picture on a milk carton that offers a reward, would they get the money?

Boys are like slinkies; practically useless, and yet it is SO amusing to watch them fall down the stairs!!

I'm INTO THEATRE & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I’m a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude
I'm BI, so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naïve
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I’m WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshipping baby killer.
I’m A GOOD LIAR, so I MUST be an actor/actress
I’m a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone’s ass
I’m a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian
I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant
I’m FRENCH, so I MUST be homosexual
I’m a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict
I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian
I’m a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie
I’m INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs
I’m a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math
I'm BLACK, so I MUST be on welfare
I'm PUNK, so I MUST cut my wrists
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist

I'm IRISH, so I MUST be a alcoholic

I'm BLOND, so I MUST be a stupid ditz

I'm BRUNETTE, so I MUST be a nerd.

I'm in the Band, so I MUST be a geek.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore
I'm a JEW, so I MUST be greedy
I have A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS so I MUST be dating them all
I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd
I love RENT so I MUST be an emo lesbian with AIDS.
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST believe in heaven.
I'm an ACTRESS, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST be a romantic sap who cries over everything.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST be weak.
Stereotypes suck!
Copy, paste & add

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn’t have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

Repost this if you believe homophobia is wrong.

Work vs Prison

IN PRISON... you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.
AT WORK... you spend the majority of your time in a 6X8 cubicle.

IN PRISON... you get three meals a day.
AT WORK... you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it.

IN PRISON... you get time off for good behavior.
AT WORK... you get more work for good behavior.

IN PRISON... the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
AT WORK... you must carry around a security card and open all the doors for yourself.

IN PRISON... you can watch TV and play games.
AT WORK... you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

IN PRISON... you get your own toilet.
AT WORK... you have to share with some idiot who pees on the seat.

IN PRISON...they allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK...you can't even speak to your family.

IN PRISON... all expenses are paid by the taxpayers with no work required
AT WORK... you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners.

IN PRISON... you spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out.
AT WORK... you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.

IN PRISON... you must deal with sadistic wardens.
AT WORK... they are called managers.

So why is it, again, that we work?

What makes life 100 percent?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100 percent? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants more than 100 percent. How about achieving 103 percent? Here's a little math that might prove helpful.

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

then:

H A R D W O R K
8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98

K N O W L E D G E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96

but:

A T T I T U D E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100

and:
B U L L S H I T
2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103

So, it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge will get you close,
attitude will get you there, but bullshit will put you over the top.

And look how far this will take you...

A S S K I S S I N G
1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118

Think about it... and have a nice day at work... : )

FRIENDS: Will help me find my way when I'm lost
BEST FRIENDS: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions

FRIENDS: Will help me learn to drive
BEST FRIENDS: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance

FRIENDS: Will watch my pets when I go away
BEST FRIENDS: Won't let me go away

FRIENDS: Will help me up when I fall down
BEST FRIENDS: Will point and laugh because she tripped me

FRIENDS: Will go to a concert with me
BEST FRIENDS: Will kidnap the band with me

FRIENDS: Ask me for my number
BEST FRIENDS: Ask me for her number

FRIENDS: Hide me from the cops
BEST FRIENDS: are probably the reason they're after me in the first place

FRIENDS: let me make an idiot of myself in public
BEST FRIENDS: are up there with me making an idiot out of themselves too.

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN! We messed up!"

OR, "LET'S DO IT AGAIN NEXT WEEK!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through highschool/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!

FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this shit!

Did you know...

kissing is healthy.

bananas are good for period pain.

it's good to cry.

chicken soup actually makes you feel better.

94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.

lying is actually unhealthy.

you really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.

it's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.

89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.

it's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.

chocolate will make you feel better.

most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.

a good friend never judges.

a good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.

boys aren't worth your tears.

we all love surprises.

Old Is When:

1. Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face

2. You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

3. Getting a little action means you don't need fiber today.

4. Getting lucky means you can find your car in the parking lot.

5. An all-nighter means not having to get up to go pee

Quotes

"When in danger or in doubt,

Run in circles, scream and shout"

"If yaoi was a deadly virus, half of the world would be dead." -Random person from Deviantart.

Misa: I couldn't stand living in a world without Light!

L: Yes it would be dark.

HOW I EXPLAIN LIFE AND DEATH...

Life, is like God's way of kicking your sorry ass out of heaven and yelling, "AND DON'T COME BACK!!"

Death, is like God's way of dragging you back up to heaven by your collar, mumbling, "Okay, I think you've done enough damage..."

Interesting and insane laws:

Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a 500 dollar fine.(damn there goes my plan! lol)

It is illegal for horses to eat fire hydrants.(but thats a horses favorite flavor, fire hydrant :D)

It is illegal to allow a dog to be in a public place without its master on a leash.

It is illegal to allow a pet cat to run loose without a taillight.(why does my cat need a tail light?)

It is illegal to carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock.(but thats the ideal lunch time)

It is illegal to drive a motor vehicle on city streets unless a man with a lantern is walking ahead of it.("sorry officer i ran over my lantern dude 2 miles back")

It is illegal to eat in a place that is on fire.(but its soo fun!)

It is illegal to have sex on a parked motorcycle.(well yea cuz the lantern dude doesn't want to see it XD)

It is illegal to purchase an alcoholic beverage after midnight on Sunday, yet one may do so on Monday.

It is illegal to purchase or use Sparklers in the city, yet you can buy fully disassembled automatic machine guns.(we're so screwed up)

It is illegal to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.(but its a great work out! and your multitasking)

It is illegal to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.

It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.(well what if my house is on fire while hes napping? then hes not doing his job!)

The penalty for jumping off a building is death.(assuming your still alive after jumping)

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.(but i don't have any other time to use it!)

On a bag of Fritos: ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.(damn you fritos!)

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."(...how do i use regular soap????)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."(but i love the frozen crunchy-ness)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."(...i wonder what happens XD)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."(i thought it was gonna be cold! isn't that what heating is?)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."(but its quicker!)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."(we'd be so much safer if them damn 9 year olds stayed off the road!)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."(I hope so!)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."(as opposed to space)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."(oh i know the other use...the killing people use...right?)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."(damn it! why would you put nuts in peanuts???)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."(what if i wanna eat the nuts before opening the packet?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."(damn i hought i'd really be superman)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands."(but its the most convenient way!)

These are newspaper headlines that are...well they made me laugh. These were copied from a profile after i couldn't stop laughing

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter

This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!! They put in a correction the next day.

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

No, really? Ya think?

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

Now that's taking things a bit far!

Miners Refuse to Work after Death

Good-for-nothing, lazy slackers

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

See if that works any better than a fair trial!

War Dims Hope for Peace

I can see where it might have that effect!

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile

Ya think?!

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

Who would have thought!

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

You mean there's something stronger than duct tape? Oklahoma's new construction program!

Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge

He probably IS the battery charge!

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

Weren't they fat enough?!

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

That's what he gets for eating those beans!

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

Do they taste like chicken?

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

Chainsaw Massacre all over again!

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Boy, are they tall!

And the winner is...

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

It’s not just me right?

A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
The white man said, "colored people are not allowed here."
The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:
"When I was born I was black,"
"When I grew up I was black,"
"When I'm sick I'm black,"
"When I go in the sun I'm black,"
"When I'm cold I'm black,"
"When I die I'll be black."
"But you sir..."
"When you're born you're pink,"
"When you grow up you're white,"
"When you're sick, you're green,"
"When you go in the sun you turn red,"
"When you're cold you turn blue,"
"And when you die you turn purple."
"And yet you have the nerve to call me colored"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Copy this onto your site and help stop racism

How You Know You’re Addicted to Yaoi/Slash

1. You start mentally pairing up random guys on the street.

2. You wish you had gay friends just so you could perve on them kissing their boyfriends.

3. You don’t remember the last time you read a heterosexual fanfiction.

4. You have developed a sexual fetish for handcuffs, leather and BDSM.

5. If you are a heterosexual girl, you keep trying to seme your boyfriend, despite the fact that you don’t have the necessary parts.

6. You suddenly become interested in gay rights, thinking this will increase your opportunities for voyeristic activities.

7. You try to get your friends into it, simply so you can talk to them about it without them getting that bored look on their face.

8. You keep lying about the number of hours you spend each day on the computer reading slash fanfiction, watching yaoi anime etc.

9. The most exiting moment of your life so far was when you discovered hentai manga.

10. You celebrate turning 18 not because you can watch R movies, but because you’re old enough to watch movies with explicit gay sex scenes.

11. It’s the only aphrodesiac you need.

12. When your boyfriend tells you he’s gay and has been dating another man, you immediately ask if you can join in.

13. Your gay son wishes he had a normal, homophobic mother who didn’t ask him questions about his latest sexual exploits.

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Something About That Bruised Face by messedupinthehead69 reviews
I suck at summaries. This story contains abuse, and boy love (AKA boyxboy yaoi gay couple ETC) Please tell me how bad I suck
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,438 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 3/29/2013 - Published: 1/28/2013
Amethyst and Sapphire by ShingetsuXMangetsu reviews
Ancel is a fledgling vampire prince living in New York and trying not to become a monster. One night he's cornered by a group of werewolves and saved by one too. He's found love but his blue-blood family hates werewolves boyXboy, gay, yaoi, please read A/
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 37 - Words: 68,721 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 9/16/2011 - Published: 1/1/2011
Without a doubt by Kenya Bloodstone reviews
Slash m/m Ciaran is the shy new kid in school. Adam is the outspoken overly friendly guy who decides to befriend Ciaran. Will Ciaran allow Adam into his heart or has he suffered to much to feel the love from the other boy? *Abuse*
Fiction: General - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 23 - Words: 232,066 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 6/7/2008 - Published: 11/12/2007
How Long is Forever? by gummybaby reviews
Slash Kaylen's got an abusive boyfriend, a new job as a high school History teacher, and a new penchant for a certain someone's apple pies.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 8,789 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 87 - Updated: 3/23/2008 - Published: 2/6/2008
Cutter by KorruptedKamera reviews
a poem about cutters
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 71 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Published: 5/12/2002
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Love Me reviews
Watari is so annoyed with L always being so calm and composed, so he decided to play a little prank on him. Of course, L being L he won't let things go Watari's way but could this harmless prank bring love to L. Boyxboy, yaoi, lemon, OCxL
Fiction: Manga - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,533 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/14/2013 - Published: 2/11/2013
Darling Thoughts
I always thought that I was worthless, that I was nothing. I mean how could I not believe it when I was told that every single day. Then I met a man and everything changed. Abuse, rape, slight bulling and thoughts of suicide.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,656 - Published: 7/14/2013
Love Sick
Unrequited love is a funny thing. Especially when you're small, weak and shy but more importantly when the one you love can read you like an open book. AU, Yaoi, Thoughts of Suicide
Fiction: Manga - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,028 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/13/2013 - Published: 2/11/2013
Little Flower
I always watched, I watched them hug, I watched them kiss and it made me sick. Sick with myself for how much it hurt, the pain tearing me apart every chance it got because I had fallen in love with my brothers boyfriend. AU, Cutting, Suicide, Yaoi
Fiction: Manga - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,776 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/13/2013 - Published: 2/11/2013
Missing Parts reviews
Does god exist? Raven has convinced himself, becuase of all the bad things he's seen, that he doesnt. After meeting Alex, the popular christian boy at school and having all his expectation blown away, will he think differently? Boyxboy, Child abuse, Thoughts of cutting
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,503 - Reviews: 2 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 3/5/2013 - Published: 2/11/2013
Rules of Life reviews
Long sense presumed dead it is happy news we are bring as Hazel Beckman was found alive after being kidnapped 11 years ago from the local park. Police raided the house on suspicion of drugs only to find Hazel being held in the house. Suspects are in custody and Hazel has been moved to a secure place. Boyxboy, very dark, abuse, recovery
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,094 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 2/17/2013
Suicide Note
Is suicide the ultimate freedom? Emmett Grey thinks so. One-shot
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,682 - Favs: 1 - Published: 2/11/2013 - Complete