Author has written 1 story for General.
So I really suck at these but I will try my hardest.
Books I like
Maximum Ride- Best series ever!!!!!!!!
Percy Jackson and the Olympians- My favorite book series in elementary school, and still basically is
The a Inheritance cycle- Really really enjoyed it. Kinda sad about the end of inheritance though
Hush Hush- Love them!!! Patch is on my top five list of most gorgeous fictional character seated at number two. Fang is still number one
Witch and wizard- Pretty good trilogy, I loved the plot.
Heroes of Olympus- Has the potential to be just as great as PJO
The Kane Chronicles- Really good. I was sad when it ended though:(
Rangers Apprentice- This was a really good series. I was especially sad when they ended the series with a cliff hanger
Gone series- Awesome books. Sometimes they're so intense that I have to put down the book.
Divergent trilogy- I absolutely love these books. Still need to read Insurgent
The Unwanteds- I really like this one because it felt like the world I've always dreamed of
Seven Kingdoms Trilogy- I really liked these they were really interesting
I am who I am with no exceptions- Haley Williams (Paramore)
I like hardcover books, because every time someone says that reading is stupid, I smack them with whatever book I have on hand.
Love? I'd rather fall in chocolate.
Yes, I hit like a girl. You would too if you hit a little bit harder.
The only thing better than chocolate is a good friend with chocolate
When Life gives you lemons, squirt them into Life's eyes and see how Life likes lemons then!
Remember there's a light at the end of every tunnel, just make sure its not a train.
Don't take life too seriously, it's not like you're getting out alive
The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with
Some people are like Slinkies: not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face, when you push them down a flight of stairs
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
Tough times never last, but tough people do
Imagination is more important than knowledge
You say I've lost my sanity. Well I have news for you. You can't lose what you never had
Yeah, Im a loser. but the coolest loser you'll ever meet
There's nothing wrong with talking to random objects, its when they start to talk back that you need to worry.
Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
What you call dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
I could've eaten Alphabits and crapped out a better essay!!
Constantly choosing the lesser of two evils is still choosing evil
You laugh because I'm different...I laugh cause I just farted!
He who laughs last didn't get it.
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt
If you haven't found something strange during the day, it hasn't been much of a day
Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well
You need only reflect that one of the best ways to get yourself a reputation as a dangerous citizen these days is to go about repeating the very phrases which our founding fathers used in the struggle for independence.
Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.
Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, anymore than standing in your garage makes you a car
If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you
I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book
Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm.
There’s too much blood in my caffeine system.
Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss
All people have the right to stupidity but some abuse the privilege.
why are they called apartments if they are all stuck together?
There can be over one million fangirls of someone, but in your own mind, they always belong to you
I know I'm in my own little world, but it's okay, they know me here
You know what makes me sad? YOU DO! Why don't we just waltz on over to nambi-pambi land and get you some self confidence, you jackwagon! Tissue? Crybaby!
Heaven doesn't want me and Hell is afraid I'll take over.
They say "guns don't kill people; people kill people", but I think guns help. If you just stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you would kill too many people.
Real girls aren't perfect, perfect girls aren't real. You want a perfect girl? Go buy a Barbie.
Having the love of your life say "We can still be friends" is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.
She's my best friend. Break her heart and I'll break your face.
Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down
On a scale from Waldo to Anne Frank, how good was that hiding spot?
I like you. People say I’ve got no taste, but I like you.
“Are you being sarcastic?” “Well no duh!”
Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.
I’m not listening, but keep talking. I enjoy the way your voice makes my ears bleed.
I’m not your type. I’m not inflatable.
“I’d insult you, but the sad truth is that you wouldn’t understand and if I tried to explain it to you, your brain might implode from information overload.”
Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either.
This place is so weird that the cockroaches have moved next door.
I would have liked to insult you, but the sad truth is that you wouldn't understand me.
He always finds himself lost in thought; it's unfamiliar territory.
You should do some soul-searching. You might just find one.
If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?
I'm not so good with the advice... Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand.
This is really cool:
Bruno Mars had a GRENADE and Taio Cruz had DYNAMITE and they threw them to Katy Perry who exploded like a FIREWORK, the bang was so loud the Black Eyed Peas forgot THE TIME while Rihanna had memory loss and ran around saying WHATS MY NAME and then Eminem looked around saying IAM NOT AFRAID then Willow Smith started to WHIP her HAIR which scared the Far East Movement and they started to fly LIKE A G6 and then NELLY woke up saying it was JUST A DREAM.
Things I like
- Macaroni and Cheese Sandwiches (I don't care if you think they're gross)
- Flying (I know we all want to fly so why not say you like it even though you haven't experienced it?)
- My kindle
- Chapters or barns and Nobles. It depends if I'm in the states or not.
Favourite Maximum ride quotes:
Max: "Will you quit that?"
Gasman: "What does that mean" (points to a sign that says Stay Off the Third Rail!)
Fang: "Man, you weigh a freaking ton. What've you been eating, rocks?"
Dr. Martinez: "I take it you don't want me to call your parents?"
Max: “I’m okay now. Maybe it’s a stomach bug or something.” Yeah, the kind of stomach bug that causes brain cancer.
Max: “Sixty dollars?”
Fang: “Yes! Freaks rule.”
Mike: “Where’s your gear?”
Random Person: “Is this a movie?”
Agent: “And how do you spell that?”
Iggy: “Max? Can I come in?”
Max: “Something’s wrong with me, but I don’t know what.”
Fang: “Holy (insert a swear word of your choice here).”
Max: “Did you know that wasn’t me, the other Max?”
Max: “Lay off the freaking horn!”
Max: “I hate you!”
Dr. Martinez: “Fang? Are you – like Max?”
Max: “So, you have your price. Your soul for a cookie.”
Max: “Fang, Fang, Fang. I love you. I love you sooo much.”
Max: “What I said yesterday didn’t mean anything! I love everyone in the flock! Plus, it was the Valium talking!”
Fang: “There is one bright side to this.”
Jeb: “The truth is, Max, nothing is as it seems.”
Ter Borcht: “You haf a malfunctioning chip, you get debilitating headaches, and your leadership skills are sadly much less than ve had hoped for.”
Ter Borcht: “Vhat ozzer abilities do you haf?”
Ter Borcht: “Do you haf any qualities dat distinguish you in any way?”
Ter Borcht: “Does anysing on you vork properly?”
Ter Borcht: “Is dere anysing special about you?”
Gazzy: (in ter Borcht’s voice) “I vill now destroy de Snickuhs bahrs!”
Max: “Now, let’s say they come get us.”
Ter Borcht: “It is time to eliminate you. You haf failed all de tests. You are not useful.”
Max: “Gosh. It’s like looking in a mirror.”
Scientist: “As high as a plane?”
Fang: “Have you guys been playing in toxic waste again?”
Nudge: “No. I looked for you too. Were you behind the tree?”
Total: “I don’t have fleas.”
Iggy: “They call me the White Knight.”
Max: “I’m only a kid! I can’t get married!”
Max: When Fang asked if it was time to get back, I thought hazily, Back to what?
Max: “Did you leave the flamethrowers lying around again?”
Ensign: "I'm supposed to lead some temporary recruits to mess, kit, and then the BSSTC grounds."
Iggy: "If you wanted me to take a shower, all you had to do was pay me ten bucks, like you usually do."
God created boys before girls because every true artist creates a rough draft before a masterpiece.
15 Ways to Get Kicked Out of WalMart
1-wander through the store dressed in all black with a fake walkie-talkie humming the Mission Impossible theme. When someone asks what you're doing, scream "LOOK OUT!!" and push them behind a shelf
2-Pass out bananas to random people and snicker loudly after they take one.
3-Buy 350 packets of tuna and scream "THIS CAN'T BE RIGHT!! YOU HAVE TO PUT SOME BACK!!" once the cashier tells you the price
4-Walk around looking confused in the CD section and ask someone where you can find some "musical devices"
5-when the announcer-thing comes on, throw yourself on the floor and scream "THE VOICES!!THEY'RE BACK!!"
6-start a fish stick fight
7-walk up to random people and give them giant bear hugs. Then scream "I MISSED YA, MAN!!"
8-(this requires a friend) Jump in a cart and have a friend push you around screaming "The British are coming!!"
9-walk up to an employee and murmur "code red in aisle 3" and see what they do
10-slip a bra and a lacey pink thong into a really macho-looking man's cart (just make sure he doesn't have any girls with him)
11-attempt to fly off a high shelf
12-throw confetti on random people walking into the store
13-whisper "I know your "little secret"' to people in the checkout line
14-stand inside the freezer at the frozen food section
15-walk up to empoyees and whisper "I saw dead people...They want me to take you away...to aisle 8..
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair!).
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (well no dur.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
On a cup of noodles: "WARNING: product may be hot when ready" (Apparently we use ice cubes to cook noodles nowadays.)
A newspaper headline read :FIVE MEN DO THE WORST THING EVER. And then there was nothing more on the subject but a picture of a jail. Anyone else curious what the 'worst thing ever' is?
A computer packaging label read "WARNING! Contents are liable to overload. HANDLE WITH CAUTION!". Don't computers need to be plugged in to overload in the first place?
On a package of sesame seed burger buns: "NOTE: ingesting sesame seeds will not cause sesame plants to grow in your stomach". Do I even need to say ANYTHING after that?
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