incrediblectopus
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Joined 09-17-12, id: 871448, Profile Updated: 07-14-14
Author has written 1 story for Fantasy.

I haven't written any stories. I have a bunch of ideas floating in my head, but I can never focus on anything long enough to finish it.

My favorite authors are:

Rick Riordan

Derek Landy

Tamora Pierce

Clive Barker

J.K. Weaver

JoanofArc7777777

(I'm sure the list will grow, but I can't remember anybody else at the moment.)

Facts!:

I am a girl.

I am in high school.

I have braces. They are gold. Silver is just too mainstream.

I like hard candy too much to give it up, so as a result I have accidentally dislodged the brackets from my teeth a few times.

I loathe PE.

I like shiny things.

I know how to knit.

I have memorized all of the countries of the world.

Science is my favorite class.

I have a shower curtain with the Periodic Table on it. It makes me happy.

I like Shakespeare.

I love Shel Silverstein.

I have recently joined OBOB. Look it up.

I am a fangirl. In fact, I discovered this site through FanFiction.net. I frequent the fandoms of Harry Potter, Twilight, and Avengers, mainly because there are hundreds of thousands of fics about them, and you can always find something that piques your interest.

Some marvelous quotes I have discovered:

"To what do I owe the honor, gorgeous? It's not my birthday, but I sure as fuck wouldn't mind lighting your candlestick on fire before blowing it."
"When in doubt, try another hole."
--When the Walls Come Tumbling Down, by rmhale. (FanFiction.net)

"My friends get high on life and drunk on juice boxes."
"I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it!"
--?

I am currently reading:

Peter and the Starcatchers, by Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Cynical Ranting of Hayden Paretski by The Original Psycho reviews
I glare at him. "What exactly IS your problem?" He slams a fist into the tree, bruising his knuckles on the bark as blood leaks in thin streaks across his hand. "The PROBLEM is that I'm in love with you!" Oh, crap. SLASH.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 14 - Words: 52,130 - Reviews: 389 - Favs: 498 - Follows: 570 - Updated: 1/2 - Published: 4/10/2009
Ursa Minor by lounolan reviews
After some rough years former bad boy Matthew O'Neill is trying to piece together a new life with all good things. A pretty, if maybe super religious girlfriend, a group of close, if somewhat crazy friends, a loving, if a bit unusual family. But his mind is still a mess sometimes. And for some reason the new student with the bluest eyes ever just won't leave him alone. M/M Slash
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 119,818 - Reviews: 101 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 9/27/2015 - Published: 3/3/2013
The Carnivore by Laurence Spencer reviews
Rory is odd. His sister's boyfriend, Deacon, is a blond alpha-male and probably a carnivore... and Rory is just begging to be eaten. Slash, M/M. Complete, epilogue to follow.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 49,697 - Reviews: 124 - Favs: 231 - Follows: 233 - Updated: 3/4/2015 - Published: 1/8/2012 - Complete
Optimism For Beginners by Error-Author reviews
Sequel to A Textbook Case. Two years after Matthias Lauhlin leaves St. Augustine he finds himself right back where he started. Except somehow everything seems to be backwards and he’s being stalked by the personified form of optimism. MxM
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 12,285 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 10/14/2014 - Published: 6/23/2010
See You Smile by DawnSister reviews
OMG I'm such a creep. I have a new neighbour. He's gorgeous, but all I can do is watch him from behind the ivy on my decking. He's going to get a restraining order I swear. He's half my age. Am I a dirty old man? (M/M, age gap, some drama and a lot of inner angst)
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 76,886 - Reviews: 105 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 10/9/2014 - Published: 9/21/2014 - Complete
After School Study Sessions by Laurence Spencer reviews
Jared's sexual preference is often, and Wren is just too much fun to mess with. M/M, slash, smut.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 13,945 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 7/5/2014 - Published: 5/13/2013
Back to the Drawing Board by Pretty Rad reviews
Slash. Sequel to "Clean Up On Aisle 7." Shaun's trying to move on; it's just not that easy. His mom's disapproval doesn't help. Nor does the fear of his dad's reaction, Steph's and Benji's ridiculousness, and a girl with an annoying crush. Oh. Then there's fact that he apparently doesn't know how to have fun. Luckily, he meets someone who can help with that. And maybe a bit more...
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 40 - Words: 171,870 - Reviews: 168 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 12/1/2013 - Published: 12/1/2012 - Complete
The Conquest by Caddaren reviews
A demon from the third sector of Hell finds herself in a blooming friendship with one of the six High Princes. Various passions are smothered underneath the growing bond. After a while, however, greater powers decide enough is enough.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 21 - Words: 51,099 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 11/10/2013 - Published: 11/21/2012
All In by UnbridledSilence reviews
Phineas is so nerdy that even his name labels him. He has gone his entire life without sex and is determined to solve that problem. However, when he books an escort to take his virginity he somehow ends up with Chance instead. Who is NOT impressed when the beautiful young man he took to bed tries to pay him. 6/16/15-uploading chapter edits. New chapters soon!
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 104,957 - Reviews: 226 - Favs: 128 - Follows: 187 - Updated: 10/1/2013 - Published: 5/12/2013
Welcome to Hellsbane by JoanofArc7777777 reviews
"She stared up into the fiery eyes of the seven-foot-tall Lion; literally fiery eyes, the beast was made entirely of flame. She shouldn't have been surprised really; other freshmen got to face off against Goblins and Baykoks, but of course she would get stuck with Ifrit, Lord of the Blaze. She wished he was Ifrit, Lord of the Candles; it was a FAR less threatening title." HIATUS
Fiction: Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Adventure - Chapters: 24 - Words: 91,621 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 9/1/2013 - Published: 11/26/2012
Now See Here! by Wynja reviews
Mark catches the eye of one of the company's most powerful men, but he can't see it himself. Literally. This is an office romance story… with a bit of a twist… (male/male)
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 48,926 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 166 - Follows: 79 - Updated: 8/16/2013 - Published: 6/15/2013 - Complete
Alien Abductions are Fun! SLASH DRABBLE by UnbridledSilence reviews
SOL, the artificial intelligence programmed by over fifty people and retaining personality traits from all of them (mostly the perverted ones), decides that his pilot needs some love. Plus, SOL is a bit bored. So he kidnaps Keegan from Earth during a stop to buy odd looking foot wear for a client. This is just a drabble story about their lives and adventures in space together-SLASH
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,583 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 7/16/2013 - Published: 7/2/2013
Haze by asteriaphoebe reviews
A lone traveler passed a country, hoping to see the amazing dance between the Prince and the Princess.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: K - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 274 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/30/2013 - Complete
Prisoner 543 by J.K. Weaver reviews
Flash Fiction about a wrongly accused prisoner.
Fiction: Essay - Rated: T - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 876 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/12/2013 - Complete
More Than That by Pretty Rad reviews
One-shot. Slash. I'm dead. You know—a ghost. Which is perfectly fine with me. Or it used to be, at least. Before I met him. Before I feel in love with him. And that's a problem. Because he's alive. While I'm not. And I hate it. It's awful. More than that, it's excruciating. Especially when I find out about the bruises and scars and how much he hates living. (Warnings within)
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 14,635 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 11 - Published: 2/14/2013 - Complete
My First Love by petbuddy reviews
helped me to write it
Poetry: Love - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 163 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/10/2012
Why? by petbuddy reviews
questions
Poetry: Life - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/2/2012
A Verry, Verry Short Story by penguin5689 reviews
Well... You'll just have to read it to find out what its about.
Fiction: General - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 37 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/2/2012 - Complete
Shrieks to Shreekz by AzureKate reviews
Raj had nicknamed him "Shrieks" due to his tendency to shriek at things, especially things he didn't like. But Shrieks, who sometimes communicated by writing, had spelled it "Shreekz," and when Raj tried to explain the correct way to spell it, Shrieks, to no surprise, shrieked at him. The two had "argued" over it ever since.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,554 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/1/2012 - Complete
The Lullaby Tree by petbuddy reviews
melodic peaceful poem
Poetry: Fantasy - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 80 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 11/30/2012
Lingering Scent by petbuddy reviews
Poem about a cheating wife and husbands loss
Poetry: Love - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 59 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/24/2012
I 90 West by goudacheese reviews
Ivan has no love for adventure, nor does he have any sort of desire to see and/or experience the world around him. In point of fact, overly long trips of any sort kind of make him want to die, so there is obviously no reason for him to force his best friend on a journey across America with him. Obviously. M/M slash etc
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 60,720 - Reviews: 172 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 11/21/2012 - Published: 6/26/2012 - Complete
Father Time by petbuddy
poems about aging any feedback appreciated
Poetry: Life - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 175 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/21/2012
Snakes and Snails by Anihyr Moonstar reviews
Everyone knows when a boy pulls on your hair, it's because he 'likes' you. "Derik, ow!" Quan yelps, whipping around to glower heatedly at his friend. "Quit it!" Snapshots from the childhoods of two friends who grow up to be something more complicated. Pre-SLASH.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,135 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 28 - Published: 7/4/2012
The Side Effects of Forgetting by seventhswan reviews
Kellan can't remember how he's supposed to act, but he thinks it probably doesn't involve making friends with the lunatic girl-next-door and letting his best friend put his hand down his pants. M/M Slash.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 32,395 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 294 - Follows: 29 - Published: 12/8/2011 - Complete
Stop Stalking Me! by Burlesque Graffiti reviews
So my name is Calen. I'm 21 and I'm an aspiring artist. Oh and I have a stalker. A rich, hot stupid stalker who won't leave me alone because I crashed into his car. Yeah...Great.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 49,203 - Reviews: 237 - Favs: 328 - Follows: 390 - Updated: 4/1/2011 - Published: 11/15/2008
Put It in Drive by Ryette reviews
Every Friday, Riley gets home from work and parks his car around the block because the guests at Jasper’s parties always block Riley's driveway. So when Riley parks in his own driveway on a Friday, he gets pretty suspicious. Birthday present for Emily.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,842 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 135 - Follows: 14 - Published: 3/4/2011 - Complete
Body, Mind, Soul by big.break.and.laryngitis reviews
They say that Alex--yeah. They're saying he didn't even know." Deana's secret is out and Alex is alone. He won't talk about it, and nobody seems to know the full story. But Julian wants to get to the bottom of things. Complete.
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,611 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/23/2010 - Complete
What a Lovely Scarf, Seth by Pretty Rad reviews
Slash. I swear, this boy’s the definition of calm and collected. I doubt he even knows how to be angry. Even when he found out his boyfriend was cheating on him, he was all suave and cool about it. Seriously? Hell! Nana would love him...Oh...Nana...
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 10 - Words: 48,930 - Reviews: 276 - Favs: 335 - Follows: 91 - Updated: 10/30/2009 - Published: 7/7/2009 - Complete
Sunny Mr Finnigan by iBrandi reviews
Out of all people, Finn Blake the Ultimate Jock was probably the last person you'd pick to turn gay. Yet there he was, hiding behind a truck, making creepy stalker eyes at the littlest punk ever. Ah, romance.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,569 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 223 - Follows: 19 - Published: 10/8/2009 - Complete
Make the Yuletide Gay by Aggy Bird reviews
In which we find romance, angst, a dash of mystery, bad puns, and Santa Jr.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,863 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 316 - Follows: 20 - Published: 2/1/2009 - Complete
Soundless by Nicale reviews
Shawn is deaf, but at the age of five he learned that he could read thoughts. He goes to visit his father, and once there meets someone who will change his life. M/M.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Angst/Supernatural - Chapters: 30 - Words: 52,185 - Reviews: 294 - Favs: 632 - Follows: 171 - Updated: 1/20/2009 - Published: 11/1/2008 - Complete
Rocked Like Me by Enigmatic Night reviews
I may be somewhat strange, but he's got arrogance down to an artform. I may have thrown a rock at his car, but it's no excuse to concoct a plan to kill me. Honestly, who does he think he is? The nerve of some people. Course language, you've been warned.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 31 - Words: 166,623 - Reviews: 1168 - Favs: 1,441 - Follows: 499 - Updated: 12/6/2008 - Published: 3/25/2007 - Complete
Minuet of the Night by Tygati reviews
Slash. An ancient vampire avoids love for fear of madness, but even he must eventually wear down in the face of overwhelming persistence and impossibly blue eyes.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 6 - Words: 15,500 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 17 - Published: 6/24/2008 - Complete
Jack Olsen: Private Investigator by a.s. bygones reviews
When Jack goes undercover at his old high school, the last thing he expects is to find his old high school crush teaching English. But he makes the most of it. SLASH.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,871 - Reviews: 84 - Favs: 452 - Follows: 38 - Published: 7/13/2007 - Complete
Promiscuous Ambivert by xanthofile reviews
[slash] Russel Shaw is always ok. Never ruffled, put out, or angry. Most believe he's far too casual and never pays attention to the rules. But for a free cone of banana ice cream, who needs those things anyways? [oneshot]
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,384 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 5 - Published: 6/21/2007 - Complete
An Open Letter to Teenagers by Xineph reviews
Read it.Please.
Fiction: Essay - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,608 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/17/2007 - Complete
The Girl for Me by failte200 reviews
Slash. TG. Straight jockboy Kevin thinks he has gay, cross-dressing Danny under his thumb. Kevin only likes girls. So... why does he keep thinking about her? Or him. Whatever.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 77,510 - Reviews: 413 - Favs: 793 - Follows: 128 - Updated: 2/14/2007 - Published: 11/27/2006 - Complete
Good Enough For Me by a.s. bygones reviews
Tristan attends the wedding reception of a friend and is surprised when he sees who the groom is. Rated to be safe. SLASH. One shot.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,281 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 10 - Published: 11/27/2006 - Complete
Nectar reviews
The tale of a vampire and it's hunt.
Poetry: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Drama/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 114 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 12/2/2013 - Complete
J.K. Weaver (11)
petbuddy (130)