hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 11-30-13, id: 952750, Profile Updated: 01-11-14
Author has written 1 story for Young Adult.

This is KeepCalmandWriteWhatever. Just to clarify things I did used to be KeepCalmandWriteANovel, I did change my pen name again.

So you want to know about me, huh? Probably not, but I'll tell you anyway.

My first name is Aleah, I'd prefer to be called Allie and that's all you need to know. Or any of the following: Sadalram, Ariachan, Tanakaise, or Allie's good too. NO QUESTIONS ASKED.

I am in eighth grade and currently epically failing (not literally) and though my favorite academic subject is english, we haven't written much this year. so I found , and that led to this, where I can post any random story I want to.

I try to comment on as many stories as possible, especially because the categories here are so vague that it's hard to find something you actually want to read. Or I do anyway. I have moods.

Just because I don't actually upload, you know, actual stories that much doesn't mean I've abandoned my account, I go on all the time to review and read stuff. In other words, I suck.

Random Stuff About Me:

I like filling up my profile with useless junk.Technically my favorite color is purple, but really I like every color of the rainbow and all the other ones.I am also I fan of all the seasons, because each has their own unique feature that I like. But by favorites, it's between fall and MBTI personality type is INFJ or INFP (different results whenever I take it for some reason, leaning towards INFJ) rarest in the world oh yeah!I do not judge people based on how they look but...I judge a book by it's cover. Seriously, I know I'm not the best at it but summaries mean a lot to me, especially about what might be happening in the actual story. I mean, not intentionally, but it just happens.I have ADD or ADHD-I or LAD (Laziness Abundancy Disorder) or whatever you want to call it, and so basically you can be guaranteed that every time I visit I'm supposed to be doing my favorite animal is an Eagle, my favorite land animal is humans and if you want to get specific my favorite land animal would have to be my dog Batman. He's a chiweenie dog. Half chihuahua half dachshund.Bananas are a good source of potassium.I like shoes.I have a life size teddy bear named Heinrich birthday is February birthday's not actually Feb. 29thMy Birthdays the 17th. of February.

I know karate, kung fu, and 47 other dangerous words.

You're weird. I like you

There were four cows in the field. Mama cow and three baby cows.
The first cow says "mama, why am I cold Daisy?"
To which mama replies "Because when you were born a Daisy fell on your head"
The second cow asks "Mama why am I called Rose?"
Mama says: "Because when you were born a rose fell on your head."
To which mama cow replies to ever so nicely "BRICK BE QUIET!!!"

"This is a pen"
"Only use it in times of severe distress"
"This is a PEN!"

Who's gonna take us seriously if we don't have a laser gun?

"it's ok because...I'm a ninja"

I am NOT short. I am concentrated epicness.

Everything here is EATABLE. i'm EATABLE. But that, my dear chilren, is called cannibalism, and it is frowned upon in MOST SOCIETIES.

I have a magical box! It's wayyy better than yours!!

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.

The greener grass on the other side of the fence is probably artificial turf.

Never do anything you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics.

The statement below is true.
The statement above is false.

What happens if you are going at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on?

Answer truthfully(yes or no): is the next word you are going to say no?

Your mission is not to accept the mission. Do you accept?

If the temperature this morning is 0 degrees and the Weather Channel says, "it will be twice as cold tomorrow", what will the temperature be?

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.
They told me I was gullible and I believed them.
Some people march to the beat of a different drummer. And some people tango!

The speed of time is one second per second.

I didn't fall. I attacked the floor with my epical ninja skills!

DO NOT interrupt me while I'm talking to myself.

Do NOT make me throw a possum at your face.-Anon

The hardest job in the world must be working in a bubble wrap factory. Can you imagine the self control that is required?

All the Auto-Tune in the world will never ever sound as cool as talking into a desk fan

There was a piece of chocolate cake in the fridge and a note, “Don’t eat me.” Now there’s an empty plate and a note, “Don’t tell me what to do.”

Lol has gone from meaning, “laugh out loud” to “i have nothing else to say”.

Good morning. I see the assassins have failed.

I've always wanted to spin around on a chair and say "I've been expecting you"

DEATH. Our nation's No. 1 killer.

I'm not clumsy. it's just the floor hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies & they wall gets in the way.

If it weren’t for electricity we’d all be watching t.v. by candle light

In a parallel universe Unicorns: "I don't believe in humans.

That awkward moment between birth and death

"I think it has become obvious that medicine companies have no idea what fruit tastes like."

"What doesn't kill you makes you smaller"-Mario

SCIENCE FACT: If you took out all your veins from your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

Story of a girl

she called me to get my phone number.

she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate."

she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.

she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

she tried to drown a fish.

she thought a quarterback was a refund.

she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.

she tripped over a cordless phone.

she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.

she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.

she studied for a blood test.

she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.

when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.

when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.

when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home

Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope.

Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said "2 to 4 years"

Couldn't call 911 because there was no 11 on any phone button.

When asked what the capital of California was; answered "C".

Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 125.

After losing in a breaststroke swimming competition, complained that the other swimmers were using their arms.

...And that girl...was me :3

Lol, just kidding.

My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems.

There laughing at us because we're idiots. We're laughing at them because they just figured it out.

Friends ask why you're crying. Best friends already have the shovel ready to bury whoever made you cry.

I'm the girl that who can watch tons of horror movies and not get scared but will scream at the top of my lungs when the toast pops out of the toaster.

I love school. Except for the learning part. That part gotta go.

Don't try to out-weird me. YOU WILL LOSE.

You can take my scarf. You can take my food. You can take my santa claus. But if you dare take my hat... if you dare, i will scream and tear at your face like an angry beaver... So i suggest you don't.

I'm the type of girl that will burst out at laughing over something that happend... yesterday.

hey You!! No, not you!! Yer, you. No, the other guy. Yer, you!! Do you like tacos??

I didn't lose my mind. It's at home sitting next to my common sense.

i didn't fall, i was testing gravity... it still works.

I'm on a diet. I only eat chocolate on days that end wioth 'y'

I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore... I am perfect!!

Life is random. So am I.

Yer. i've been to the dark side... They lied about the cookies

Never annoy a writer. She may put you in a book and kill you.

Automatic doors make me feel like a JEDI.

yeah. I'm a loser. But i'm the coolest loser you'll ever meet.

i do know it all. i just don't know it all at once.

Anyone can get hit by a moving car. It takes skill to be hit by a parked car.

I am smiling. That alone should scare you.

I'm the kind of person that walks into a door and apologizes.

Everyday I beat my previous record of consecutive days i've stayed alive.

I've tripped up the stairs before... but when i hit the wall, i knew i had a true talent.

i run with scissors. it makes me feel dangerous.

Reality continues to ruin my life.

22=6. Oh yeah. I rock at maths.

one does not simply walk into a shopping centre. There is evil there that does not sleep.

I've got a jar of dirt!!

I'm short. Fear me.

That half-hearted struggle to stop your relatives from giving you money.
" No no , really no, I won't take it ,please no... okay thanks"

Note to self: Do not push a door when it says 'pull'

My friends are the kind of people who will spend hours trying to drown a fish. But i still love them to death.

Then Suddenly!!

Nothing happend... but it happend suddenly!!

Was that an earthquake?? Or did I just rock your world!!

Apparently 948237593047184937835733...

will not bother to read that number. I didn't either.

i'm the type of person who doesn't know why they start laughing, so I laugh harder.

Don't follow in my footsteps. I run into walls.

I'll eat all your pie while you're not looking, because Big Bird is my leader and he told me to

ok... so i'm a little crazy, but that's how we roll.

Don't make me angry. Because if you do that, I'll slap you with my slappy slap slap flip flop!!

People that don't know me think I'm quiet. People that know me wish i was.

For all the Americans: Don't worry about the world ending today; it's already tomorrow in Australia.

Do you remember Pluto as a planet?? Yeah, those were the days.

OH NOES! RUN BEFORE THE PENGUIN ARMY OVERTAKES YOU!! (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (")
(") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (") (")

Oh that song? I kinda got in trouble for running around screaming it in Kohl's...

HAHA. I don't get it.

life's simple. Eat. Sleep. Hide from my angry army of potatoes and the evil Spatulous and HIS army.

life isn't about waiting for the storm to's about learning to dance in the rain.

Why yes I do randomly use british accents.


Man1: Man2, what are you doing?
Man2: Swimming on the floor.
Man1: is that even possible?
Man2: Yes. Now leave me alone, i'm doing butterfly.

As I was sitting there wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger and hit me.

There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased that line.

Basic Definition of Science: if it's green or wiggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics.

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask myself, 'what's wrong with my brain?' and then I say 'this is going to take more than one night'.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the least.

I’m not afraid to die. I just don’t want to be there when it happens.

I got an A in philosophy because I proved my professor doesn’t exist.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it...

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Less Than Half by Zan Geon reviews
Demon, Angel, Human. To say that Korlan's family is a little strange is an understatement. It doesn't help that he was born with not one but multiple "Blood Powers". Will he control these powers or will they control him. Updates whenever.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: M - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,669 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 1/7/2014 - Published: 11/30/2013
The Paper Children by dorandsugar reviews
A new product is released to the market, the Paper Child. The Paper Child is advertised as "the perfect child" and is a sentient being that soon becomes a hit with purchasers. Yet the picture isn't pretty and everything is far from perfect.
Fiction: General - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,118 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/1/2014 - Complete
Happy New Year by FeatheryFlow
Happy new year lovelies. This shall be a new year of writing about the power of love. Never forget it. It is the most beautiful emotion there is.. if given a chance. Please review, fave, and PM your thoughts. I love all my readers dearly. :) -FeatheryFlow
Poetry: Love - Rated: T - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 181 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/1/2014 - Complete
The Hardest Word by moonlight543 reviews
The hardest word to hear and say? But why? It's just one word. Rated K because content is appropriate for everyone.
Poetry: Friendship - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 164 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 1/1/2014 - Complete
Letter in the River by DreamWriter10 reviews
Cressida Blackburn's life takes an interesting but good turn after discovering a letter in a bottle floating down the river. New relationships are formed, adventures are had. Cress is happy. But some people aren't going to let her stay that way. Rated T for some language and mild kissing. There are some Christian elements, so if you don't like it, please don't flame.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 27 - Words: 50,187 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Published: 12/30/2013 - Complete
Broken by Ink Spotz reviews
In a future world, everyone is divided into four borders to keep the peace. When food starts running out in the borders, the borders fight each other to claim what's left of the food. Follow the story of two different border goers who try to survive the odds stacked against them and find out what is really tearing their worlds apart. (Rating may change).
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 31,006 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 11/15/2013 - Published: 9/8/2013
Musings by PLANaDIFFERENTfate
Mopey morbid mind-matters meet ADD addled anecdotes.
Fiction: General - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,984 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/21/2012
Midterms by PLANaDIFFERENTfate reviews
Shouldn't exist. An inspired poem
Poetry: School - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 125 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 1/19/2012 - Complete
Testing by Unknown Sorrow
Standardized tests...
Poetry: School - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 96 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/30/2007 - Complete
The Narcissist's Reflection by Tied Up Tied Down reviews
The Reflection of Perfection... cracked
Fiction: Fable - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,135 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Published: 8/30/2006
Narcissistic by goddessofsnark
Everything's always about ME.
Poetry: General - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 123 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/29/2003
Crossroad of Destiny reviews
You only had one mission. The mission that could make it or break it, are you ready? An old English paper, we were supposed to take a different essay that we did and change genres, so I turned it into adventure. BTW, the prompt was Moment that Matters. And the title makes no sense.
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,061 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/1/2013 - Complete
Lu-tan (1)